I was wrong! I was so very, very wrong. I couldn't have been more wrong! School is boring! I could actually feel myself get dumber the more I listened. Shouldn't it be the opposite? Aren't I here to learn? Why!?

  I thought for sure my homeroom teacher would be at least somewhat interesting to listen to, given her earlier personality, but as soon as the lecture started, her voice turned dull and apathetic.

  If you don't want to be here just say so lady! No need to torture innocent teenagers with your blandness. Or is that what she wanted? Was she some kind of sadist getting off on boring her students to death?

  I'd say respect, but as I'm one of those students, I firmly reject such a blatant attack on my person!

  And I wasn't the only one whose mind melted into mush. At one point Tatsuki's eyes just sort of… glazed over, and drool started coming out of her mouth. It took but a single day to break her spirit. Poor thing.

  Of course, not everybody disliked school for some reason. Uryuu, that damn suck up, seemed to thoroughly enjoy himself, staring at the teachers with intense eyes. And he wasn't the only one. Ryō Kunieda, a somewhat tall girl with long, straight black hair and a beauty mark under her left eye was also rather enthusiastic in her quest for government approved knowledge.

  What a cute couple those two would make…

  The teachers didn't seem to know what to make of the two of them, doing their best to avoid eye contact. You'd think they'd enjoy having such interested students, but nope. They probably don't get paid enough for enthusiasm.

  Chad and Ichigo held on pretty well, or at least better than Tatsuki. They didn't go catatonic at any rate. And Orihime seemed to actually enjoy herself, so, you know, good for her.

  However, as lunch time came around, those bastards, Ichigo and Chad, did leave it up to me to snap Tatsuki out of her school induced coma, knowing how she would react.

  Violently, if you were wondering.

  But that didn' compare to the travesty that was Orihime's lunch. It wasn't as bad as Karin's cooking, at the very least, because I couldn't hear the moaning of the damned coming from it, but it was still rather repulsive.

  Why she thought to put pickles, mayonnaise and wasabi on a peanut butter and jelly sandwich is beyond me. But at least she seemed to enjoy it, even if it made the rest of us feel queasy.

  Tatsuki and I vowed to never let her and Karin cook a dish together. We feared for what would befall the Earth should we allow them to team up.

  There was one highlight of the day, and that was P.E. The teacher was an overly enthusiastic middle aged man who thought he was better than everyone, challenging us to a push up contest. He said that whoever managed to beat him wouldn't have to run laps that day.

  So guess what I did? You have 4 choices:

  A. Back down like a total wuss and run the laps like a beaten dog.

  B. Assert my dominance over a man clearly going through a midlife crisis.

  C. Ignore everything and take a nap.

  D. Slap Tatsuki on the behind and tell her to go get him.

  You have thirty seconds, go!

  Cue Jeopardy Theme Song

  Time's up! Let's see what the answer is. If you guessed B: Assert my dominance over a man clearly going through a midlife crisis, you win! What do you win? Nothing. Sucks to be you.

  Also, fun fact, Tatsuki actually slapped me on my behind and told me to go get him. Which might explain why I didn't stop for so long. Our coach gassed out after about 120, which was respectable, but I tripled that without breaking a sweat. I think I made the poor guy cry when the butt slapper sat on my back and I kept going until I reached 500.

  Not the worst way I've ever spent my time.

  As the day went on, I thought for sure I would die from the boredom. But somehow, I persevered until I eventually heard that most glorious of sounds.

  The bell!

  "Freedom! At last I may escape this wretched establishment of forced education!" I shouted, standing up and throwing my hands into the air with pure, unadulterated joy.

  "Bit wordy there, big guy," Tatsuki smirked from her desk. As a mature and responsible member of society, there was really only one response I could give to such blatant antagonism.

  I stuck my tongue out at her.

  "Tough talk from the girl who drooled all over her desk. Tell me, just what were you daydreaming about? Was it me?" I taunted back, getting a flushed look from the sexy tomboy.

  "As if! If I was thinking about you I would have been barfing," Tatsuki claimed. But her words didn't stop the shit eating grin I wore.

  "Really? So why did you slap me on the ass earlier then?" I asked.

  "That was just… motivation," she said back.

  "I see. Motivation huh? I'll remember that when it's time for me to motivate you," I said, looking her up and down. It was way too easy to get her flustered. It was kind of cute, if you don't take into account the very real threat of getting kicked in the balls.

  "You better not. I'm warning you," she threatened.

  "Oh, what are you going to do to me?" I asked, giving her a challenging look. I think she took exception to that.

  "I'll kick your ass, that's what!" she growled.

  "Still thinking about my ass, huh?"

  "Why you…"

  "Will you two stop flirting already? You're making me nauseous," Ichigo said, standing up from his own desk. I found his words funny, but Tatsuki disagreed.

  "We are not flirting!"

  "I was," I said.

  "You shut up!" she yelled back. The other members of class watched us bicker like an old married couple with varying expressions. One girl, whose name I can't recall at the moment, looked to be on the verge of passing out.

  Am I really that scary? No, it had to be Tatsuki. I'm adorable.

  Most of the others looked either amused, annoyed, or a strange combination of both. Not that I particularly cared, mind you. They could think whatever they want of me.

  Speaking of people who looked like they were about to shit themselves every time they glanced in my direction, I couldn't see Keigo. Did he run out as soon as the bell first rang? That's some serious speed if true, because I didn't see him at all.

  I did see his friend, Mizuiro leave with the calm grace of a man with zero fuck's to give.

  Respect.

  Regardless, our group of objective weirdos made our way out of the classroom. I couldn't wait to get home and start fixing up the joint, now that I've survived the first day of school. Not gonna lie, it was more difficult than I thought, but I managed it.

  As we were walking down the stairs, I noticed that same guy from earlier, the ugly one, staring up at us with that scrunched up face of his, phone placed to his ear. Our eyes met for a second before he gave a grin and ran off.

  Wonder what that was about?

  If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

  "Hey, Ichigo…" I muttered.

  "I saw," he said back. Well that's not a good sign. His face was looking extra bitchy now. I can only imagine we're going to engage in some good old fashioned violence. Chad seemed resigned to what was about to happen as well and even Tatsuki had a nervous look on her face, walking a bit closer to Orihime.

  Speaking of the orange haired boobie monster, she was completely oblivious to the growing tension, bless her heart.

  As we made our way outside it became abundantly clear that we were going to have to deal with some nonsense. First off, there was Keigo, being held hostage by some douche with a bright blonde afro and way too many piercings.

  Seriously, did he think that made him look tough? Because he just looked stupid.

  Surrounding him were a multitude of other assholes, or as I like to call them, future patients. Because when I'm done with them, they'll need to go to the hospital. And wouldn't you know it? One of them just so happened to be that squinty eyed fuck from earlier.

  There were also a couple of guys sitting on motorcycles holding chains like they just read a T.V Tropes page on how to be a thug. It was just sad, honestly.

  "There you are, Ichigo and Chad. You kept me waiting," said blondie. He gave the two a savage smirk, probably feeling real good about himself too. Unfortunately for him, things didn't quite pan out the way he imagined.

  "Uh, who are you again?" Ichigo asked, giving him a blank look. I snorted a bit at the guy's sudden change of demeanor. Where just seconds ago he looked like your typical smug prick he now had an almost heartbroken look on his face.

  Damn, Ichigo is a savage.

  "What do you mean? It's me, Reiichi Oshima! We've fought like, 5 times! Don't pretend you don't know me!" he shouted, sounding almost desperate.

  "Sorry buddy, doesn't ring a bell," Ichigo stated, and the now named Reiichi looked like he was about to cry. Kinda makes me feel bad for when I break his nose later.

  "What? But? I… you… Chad! You remember me, right?" he pleaded. But unfortunately for him, Chad didn't remember him either.

  "No, sorry," Chad replied in his usual bland tone. Reiichi looked like he was about to have a mental breakdown, so I, being the thoughtful person I am, decided to throw the guy a bone.

  "I remember you, Reiichi Oshima, you fiend!" I shouted, getting everyone's attention. The blonde haired thug looked surprised for a second before an excited look crossed his face.

  "Really!?" he asked hopefully.

  "Of course. How could I ever forget you?" I responded back. The guy sniffled a bit, choked up with emotion. Damn my dude, it's not that serious. You're making this whole, jumping us thing kind of weird.

  However, as happy as he was to be recognized, there were some that weren't so believing. Namely, Ichigo.

  "Do you really remember him?" he asked.

  "No, of course not. But just look at him, poor guy. He looks like a kicked puppy. I just wanted to throw him a little bone before kicking his ass, that's all," I said. I wasn't quiet either, and I know for a fact Reiichi heard me. Pretty sure I just crushed his spirit.

  "Why bother? Seems like a waste of time to me," Ichigo responded, making me shrug.

  "I just thought it would be weird to fight a guy who was crying before I punched him, you know?" I said back. Ichigo gained a thoughtful look on his face at that.

  "You know, that's a good point. Never thought of it that way before."

  Reiichi, who had been listening, was turning bright red. The cloud of depression that hung over him gave way to a righteous anger so great it was almost palpable as he shouted at us.

  "You assholes think you're funny!? Let's see if you're still laughing after this! Boys!"

  Once he shouted that, more and more of his minions started crawling out of the woodwork. They surrounded us while chuckling obnoxiously the whole time, trying and failing to be intimidating.

  I mean, there were only like, 20 of them. What's to be afraid of?

  Chad, Ichigo and I stood facing them without much care. Honestly, we kind of just looked bored by the whole thing. Especially Chad. But then again, that was more or less his usual expression.

  What did surprise me was Tatsuki and Orihime. I thought for sure the tomboy would place herself defensively in front of Orihime to protect her but no, that's not what happened. They were back to back with their fists raised, ready to throw down.

  I was confused. Since when was Orihime someone who could throw a punch? Did Tatsuki teach her Karate or something? It would make sense if she did, I suppose, but I don't remember that really being a thing.

  Guess we'll see.

  "Hahaha, not so funny now, are you!? But hey, maybe if you grovel, I'll go easy on you!" Reiichi boasted. I turned to the other two beside me, confusion clear on my face.

  "Is this guy stupid or something? Doesn't he know he should be the one groveling?" I asked.

  "Thought that was obvious," Ichigo responded, with Chad giving a nod.

  "Act tough all you want, but ain't no way you can take all my boys!" Reiichi shouted, showing a startling amount of ignorance. Guess it really is bliss. Let's see how long that lasts, shall we? Time to show him the truth of the world.

  Quality is far more important than quantity.

  -New Quest-

  Goon Attack!

  You have been accosted by several people of the thug variety. Beat them up!

  Reward

  - 100 experience

  -Gain 3 Affection with Ichigo, Chad, Tatsuki and Orihime

  -Improve reputation with schoolmates

  -Starts the Conqueror's Quest line

  Failure

  -Reduced reputation with schoolmates

  -Lose 10 Affection with Ichigo, Chad, Tatsuki and Orihime

  -Gain the Beta Male Title

  Thugs remaining: 22

  Accept?

  [Yes] [No]

  Should have known this was coming. Clicking Yes, mentally of course, so I don't seem like a weirdo, I prepared to face down the horde of nameless grunts.

  "You must be joking if you think these scrubs have a chance of beating us," I said, standing there with my arms crossed over my chest and giving them a cocky smirk. That seemed to offend them, because one of those scrubs charged at me.

  "You think we're a joke!? Then get ready for the punchline!" he shouted, cocking his fist back, ready to clock me. And you know what? I let him.

  -22 Hp

  You know, he did better than I thought, but it still wasn't enough to make me budge. I simply stood there, arms still crossed over my chest, giving him a look that said, "Is that it?"

  "Um, that was supposed to knock you out," the guy said, looking like he was about to piss himself.

  "Really? Now that is a funny joke. Here, let me try one. Knock Knock," I said. It was obvious he didn't want to answer, but he eventually relented, resigned to whatever fate had in store for him.

  "...Who's there?"

  "Concussion."

  "...Concussion who?"

  As soon as he asked the question I grabbed him by the face…

  "Concussion you!"

  …And slammed him into the ground. Removing my hand from the still man, I nodded in satisfaction at his unconscious form. I stood back up to full height, rolling my shoulder.

  "One down," I said. The rest of the schmuck squad surrounding us looked scared out of their gourds, but also really pissed off. That, combined with their dangerous levels of stupid, meant they were unlikely to realize they were outmatched and continue this pointless endeavor.

  "Concussion you? Really?" Tatsuki asked with a smirk.

  "Don't act like you aren't impressed," I shot back, seeing as her Affection increased by 1. Looks like she enjoyed watching me dominate another man physically.

  That can be taken in so many ways…

  "The move was impressive, but the one liner needs some work," she japed back. I rolled my eyes at her. Everyone's a critic.

  "Wow, that was really amazing. You're just as strong as you look," Mizuiro said, walking up to me without a care in the world. I raised an eyebrow at that. How was he so chill right now? He wasn't like the rest of us who knew how to fight.

  "Uh, thanks. Who are you again?" I asked, getting a sheepish look from the boy.

  "Oh, how rude of me. Let me introduce myself. My name is Mizuiro Kojima. Nice to meet you," he said, giving a bow.

  "Well, aren't you polite. Call me Ushio," I said, though I didn't bow back. Not like I have to pretend to be polite. Nobody really expects me to be anyway.

  "Thank you," he said back, giving a smile that had absolutely no emotion behind it. He looked more like a doll than a person. I couldn't remember his backstory all that well but what the fuck happened to him to make him look like that?

  "Hey, Mizuiro, was it?" Ichigo said, getting our attention.

  "Yes? How can I help you? Ichigo, right?"

  "Yeah. Listen, not so sound rude or whatever, but why are you here?" he asked. You know, it was very polite of all those thugs to just let us have our conversation like this. Maybe they were too scared to move after I pwned their buddy? But stupid could only be held back for so long.

  "Right. Well you see, when Keigo and I were leaving, these guys showed up and decided Keigo would make a good hostage for some reason. Which is why they have my friend over there," Mizuiro calmly explained.

  "Help me!" Keigo cried.

  "Shut up!" yelled Reiichi.

  "What gave them that idea?" I asked, confused. It didn't make sense for them to grab some dude that has no affiliation with the person they were after. Ichigo was a pretty nice guy, but he wasn't exactly in the habit of helping total strangers.

  …Or was he?

  "They probably overheard him complaining loudly about all of you and mistook it for praise," Mizuiro said, more or less throwing his friend under the bus.

  "That right?" Ichigo asked with a raised eyebrow.

  "Mizuiro, you traitor!" shouted Keigo, large crocodile tears streaming down his face.

  "But he's a really good guy deep down, he just has a habit of believing every bit of gossip he hears. Other than that he's pretty dependable," Mizuiro complimented, in a backhanded sort of way.

  "Dependable, that guy? Really?" Ichigo questioned, staring at the guy who was laid out on his belly now with Reiichi stomping on his back. Keigo was reaching out for us in a manner that looked anything but dependable.

  Pitiful would be a better word to describe it.

  "I know he doesn't look like much, especially now, but he's always been there when I needed him. That's more than I can say for some people…" he said, looking down, his mask of indifference cracking just a bit.

  "I see… Guess we might as well save him then. Right Chad? Ushio?" he asked us. Chad nodded and I shrugged my shoulders.

  "Sure. Blondie's an asshole anyway so I don't mind. Wonder if I can write this off as an act of charity…" I pondered, getting sweat drops from the others.

  "I don't think beating up delinquents is tax deductible," Ichigo commented, but there was a smirk on his face.

  "Really? But it's basically community service," I complained, getting a chuckle out of the others. However, it seems our adversaries finally ran out of patience.

  "Enough talking! Get them!" he shouted, as the group charged at us.

  "Ready Orihime?" Tatsuki asked, taking a stance.

  "Ready Tatsuki," she replied, mirroring her friend's stance with a determined look on her face.

  The guy charging at me had a bat this time. Correction, I have a bat, he has a broken leg. I grinned at my four remaining opponents, casually twirling my new bat in circles as I approached.

  "Alright, who wants to spend some quality time with daddy?"