The river was wide, and the waters rushed through in rapids. We couldn’t swim across, or more specifically, Tripitaka couldn’t swim across.

  I sighed as I looked out over it and back at Tripitaka. “I might have something that can help.”

  I tapped into my chi, and used it to control the water. Lunus this was hard.

  I pulled the water out of the river under the eyes of Wukong and Trip. And formed a bridge.

  Okay, now I needed to increase the tension until it can hold Trip’s weight. I tightened my focus. Just a little more…

  “Okay. You should be able to cross now. But hurry.”

  Trip gave me a look that said he thought I was crazy, but took a cautious step onto the bridge. He looked amazed as it held his weight. He went to take another step, but froze.

  There was a roar, and an enormous snake-like being broke through the water, and right through my bridge which splashed back into the water as my focus shattered.

  Wukong pulled Trip back onto dry land just in time, and threw him behind him as he raised his staff to defend against the dragon.

  Wukong fought the beast back, and prepared to end it, but the dragon retreated back into the water.

  Wukong screeched in frustration. “Get back here you shitty lizard!” He screamed more profanities at the water as I rubbed my temples.

  “Wukong, stop that. It’s not coming back so you can kill it. And we can’t cross while it’s here. We need to figure something out. Let’s set up camp.”

  He growled at the water one more time before turning back. “Fine.”

  I sighed and brought out the tents. This journey was beginning to get to all of us.

  It wasn’t just the silence of the past few days. Well, it was a big part of it.

  It was also the fact that Wukong wouldn’t let go of his stupid pride. He always thought he was right about everything. I knew he was frustrated because of his circlet, but still, it was hard to travel with him like this.

  Something had to change. Both between us, and between him and Trip, because he was seriously starting to look depressed.

  I built a fire and we sat around it, Wukong and I together and Tripitaka on the other side.

  I looked between the two of them and sighed. This wasn’t going to be pleasant. “Any ideas on how to get past the dragon?”

  Wukong shrugged. “I say we bait the dragon out so I can kill it. Then we can lay it’s body across the river and get across.”

  Trip shook his head. “We shouldn’t kill it. It’s just trying to to defend it’s territory. It’s innocent.”

  “Of course you’d say that. But guess what? We still have to invade it’s territory to get across, so unless you have any actual solutions, why don’t you stay quiet.”

  Trip frowned at Wukong’s aggressive rebuke. “Maybe instead of fighting it, we can try to talk with it.”

  “Oh, yeah, it seemed real interested in talking just now didn’t it?”

  “Maybe if you didn’t immediately attack it, it would have! It’s a better idea than baiting it out so it can just dive under again when you try to kill it!”

  “Oh, here we go again. Wukong, how dare you save my life? Wukong, don’t you dare defend me from something when it tries to eat me! Wukong! How dare you kill something that tried to kill us first!”

  “Wukong!” Tripitaka was standing now and yelling. Wukong stood up too.

  “Oh, what? Did I do something you don’t like? Are you going to ‘punish’ me again?”

  “Both of you, SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!” I stood in between them and stared them both down. Wukong was the first to sullenly sit back down, and Trip glumly followed. “You’re both behaving like insufferable children right now. Here’s our plan.” I pointed at Wukong. “You fly off and find Guanyin. She wouldn’t send us on an impossible journey, so she has to know a way we can get through. I’ll stay here and protect Tripitaka until you get back. Got it?”

  He grumbled. “Got it.” He summoned Nimbus and hopped on. He rose up and flew away. I watched until he was out of sight, and then sighed.

  I looked back at Trip. His depression seemed to have reached it’s maximum level. I sat back down.

  “You can’t argue with Wukong. You’re just stooping down to his level, and he’ll never admit you’re right.”

  “Well, I don’t want to punish him! But he keeps fighting with me on everything. I’m supposed to be his master! How can I teach him anything if he doesn’t listen to me?” Trip broke a stick and angrily tossed it into the fire. It was the closest I’ve seen him get to actually hurting something in anger.

  Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

  No matter how frustrated he got with Wukong, he didn’t punish him again. It seemed he meant what he said about wanting to teach Wukong too.

  “I’m still not happy with you either. And while I agree you need a way to control Wukong the way you went about it wasn’t right. You basically tricked him into putting the circlet on. Why didn’t you just talk to him about it? He might have put it on willingly.”

  Trip snorted. “Really? You think he would have put on a circlet that hurt him whenever I want it to willingly?”

  “Maybe? He’s done stupider things. And before all this, he was serious about taking you as his master. Despite how he’s been acting the last few days, he really does want to change. He wants to be better. But he won’t learn if he feels like you’re forcing him to learn, like trapping him with a circlet that hurts him whenever you want it to.”

  Trip sighed. “Well, what do you suggest? Should I take it off? I won’t have a way to control him then.”

  “No, I’m saying you need to come to some sort of agreement. Establish some boundaries on when you can and can’t use the circlet. Once Wukong feels like he has some control, he’ll work with you and not against you. But you’ll have to show a lot of patience with him.”

  Trip sighed. “Okay. Its worth a shot. And Yue…” he trailed off, and buried his head between his knees.

  “Trip? Are you okay?”

  “You, you don’t really think I’m like a slaver right?” His voice cracked, and I heard the layers of thick emotion and guilt underneath. What I said back when Wukong put his circlet on must have really gotten to him.

  “Oh Trip.” I walked around the campfire and pulled him into a hug. “I don’t. I think you could have done better. But it was a difficult situation for all of us. You just want what’s best for Wukong, even if we disagree on the methods. I won’t apologize for what I said, but just know I still think you’re a good person. You’re not a slaver. You’re nowhere close.”

  Trip cried as I gave him a shoulder the cry on. I patted his back. Wow, he was crying really loudly.

  Wait. That wasn’t Trip crying. My eyes widened and I whirled around to see the dragon was back.

  It stared at us with tear-filled eyes as it sobbed. “That-that was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seeeeeeeeen.”

  It sounded female and she threw her head back and cried some more.

  “Uh.” I pulled some large scrap cloths from my necklace. “Would you like this to dry your tears?”

  “Oh, thank you.” She gently took the cloth from my hands with her short arms, then brought her nose down and blew into it.

  She then tried to hand it back to me. I pinched it, careful to keep it away from me and threw it directly into the fire.

  She seemed calmer now. “I’m sorry, it’s just, the two of you were so moving. The way he was so devastated at something you said, and the way you comforted him without even apologizing, but it was clear you still cared about him. It was all just so sweet. It made me wish I could have a conversation like that with my dad, although I know that will never happen. I’m sorry for trying to eat you earlier. Can we start over? You seem like really good people.”

  Wow, she talked fast. “Um, well, sure! I’m Yue, and this is Tripitaka. We’re on a journey for the Buddha to collect scriptures from the west and bring them back east.”

  Her eyes widened. “Wait. Waitwaitwaitwait. You’re the super special monk on a journey? Did Guanyin send you?”

  Trip nodded. “Uh, yes. She did give me this cassock and staff and told me about everything. She’s also saved my life a few times.”

  “Ooooooooooh. So, I’m like, really sorry now. You see, Guanyin saved me from execution. She brought me here and told me to wait for the super special monk on a journey to come through here. But it’s been a while, and a lot of other people who weren’t you have come by, and I was getting really hungry waiting. I’m like super-duper-ultra-mega-sorry. Can you please forgive me and let me come with you?”

  Trip looked at me, flabbergasted. Well, I didn’t know what to tell him. I was just as flabbergasted as him.

  “Ah! Guys, look out!” Fuck, my husband had the worst timing.

  He flew between us and the dragon with his staff flying. It smacked the dragon between her eyes and she roared. She and Wukong resumed their battle now twice as fierce as before.

  Guanyin floated down next to us and sighed. “I’m sorry about this. I didn’t think the other disciples would do this sort of thing. Wukong! Stop fighting the nice dragon! And Ao Lie! Who said you could eat people while you were waiting for the pilgrim!”

  “What? But she tried to eat us!” Wukong gave another swipe at the dragon, Ao Lie apparently.

  “Wukong!” Guanyin gave him a tone that said one more swipe and he’d be finished.

  He growled and backed off. He flew over by me and hopped off Nimbus with a sour look on his face.

  Ao Lie was a lot more sheepish. She swam over. “Oh, gods, I’m so sorry Guanyin, you have no idea. I’ve just been waiting for a long time, and I got really hungry because dragon form takes a lot of energy you know? And I just wanted a taste really, I swear I haven’t eaten anyone else, I promise.”

  Guanyin held up her hand to stop Lie’s tirade and sighed. “Just help these nice people across the river and on their journey okay? Do you remember what we discussed?”

  Lie nodded eagerly. “Of course! Hop on board folks, I’ll get you to the other side faster than you can say zamblooey!” Lie brought her long body up to the bank, easily moving through the rapids.

  Wukong walked towards Lie, and I turned to Guanyin before following him. “Thank you for your help.”

  She waved me off. “It looked like you already had everything figured out by the time I arrived. Oh, but I should warn you. There are two more disciples up ahead, named Wuneng and Wujing. If you tell them those names, they’ll know I’m the one who sent you and they’ll aid you on your journey. If you find yourself blocked, you’ll likely find them nearby, willing to help.”

  I nodded. “Got it. Thanks again!” I followed the rest of the party onto Ao Lie, and she ferried us across the river.

  We hopped off on the other side. And Ao Lie climbed up onto the riverbank and shook herself off.

  “Now, let me introduce myself! I am the great! The powerful! The adorable! The Ao Lie! Daughter of the eastern dragon king!”

  Wukong cocked an eyebrow at her. “I think I threatened him once?”

  “Yeah, you did! My dad gave you your staff!”

  Trip gave her a small smile. “Well, having a dragon along is certain to be very helpful.”

  She snapped her fingers. “Exactly! Now to use my fantastic powers of transformation to make this journey a piece of cake!”

  She began humming her own theme song as she twisted up into the air. The wind whipped up as she spun faster. Water spun around her and we squinted as a brilliant light began shining from her.

  She compressed, spinning faster and faster until she was just a ball of water and light that exploded into a rainbow of colors, and there, standing where Ao Lie, proud dragon, daughter of the eastern dragon king stood.

  Was a horse.

  “Tadaaaahhhhhh! Please, save your applause for the real show. This is but one of my myriad of tremendous powers.”

  “Pfffffft!” Wukong began laughing his ass off. Trip just stood there confused. I was trying to fend off a growing migraine.

  Lunus, I hoped the next two disciples were fucking normal.