Eh?

  I froze at the messages in my HUD. Was I seeing things? I had to be, and if I wasn’t, what the hell was with those options?

  That third one is way too sexual! But… It gives me the most stats. Perhaps I hadn’t been wrong in my earlier assumption. The messages would make more sense if I had a bond system.

  Hang on. Didn’t I have a harem stat? Could this be…A DATING SIM RPG! I loved those kinds of games, and I had played plenty of them before. I was the master at them, and I achieved every ending, chose every option, and unlocked every dialogue.

  I said I’d do whatever it takes to get stronger. My hands slowly grabbed Nia’s waist as she pressed closer, and I gazed deeply into her eyes. That means anything!

  “How about…” I rested my forehead on hers. “I mark you with mine?”

  Notice:

  All stats increased by 50

  That’s right! This is the power of a dating sim player! I can say cringe things and not be bothered by it!

  “Oh, Master,” Nia’s face flushed as she buried it in my chest. “Please do.”

  “Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you two!?” Erza snapped. “Are you exhibitionists?”

  Extra quest:

  Respond to Erza's insult.

  Option One: “No.”

  Reward: None

  Option Two: “Oh, yeah. Totally.”

  Reward: All stats increased by 5

  Option Three: “Are you jealous?”

  Reward: All stats increased by 10

  Ho? It seemed I was right. I had an affinity system. However, unlike most games where it deepened the bond with the character, this one made me stronger.

  If I had to guess, my bond with people was different than my stat increases, but deepening my bond also gave me stat increases, which I had experienced with Nia. Looking at the new choices in my HUD, I came to another logical conclusion. The deeper my bond was with the person, the more stats I would receive as a reward for completing the events.

  I get stronger by having a harem!

  “What’s with that revolting smile? And why the hell are you drooling like that?” Erza growled.

  “Shit, I’m drooling?” I wiped it away. Guess I got to excited thinking about that. I couldn’t help it though. I had thought this world was mocking me upon my arrival.

  I was weak, and my stats only went up by one each time I leveled up. I still hadn’t received a class either, so I had nearly given up on ever being strong unless I maxed out my level, whatever that was. But this world was offering me everything I desired. A harem of woman AND power!

  Three! Pick number three, my lord!

  “Aww,” I pouted as I leaned smugly against the counter. I couldn’t help it. If this was a dating sim, then all I had to do was act confident and say whatever I wanted. The girls would practically fall on their knees for me after that. “Is somebody jealous I’m not giving them atten-SHACK!” Erza slammed my head into the counter again.

  LUCK:

  You have survived with one HP

  Notice:

  Quest failed due to incomplete dialogue.

  QUEST FAILED!? SCREW YOU! GIVE ME MY STATS!

  A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

  It seemed I was wrong. I had forgotten that, despite feeling like it, this world wasn’t a game. So, not every girl would react the way Nia did.

  She’s probably the only one I can get away with saying it too! And she only let it slide because I was her owner. She was probably still worried about what I’d do if she made a disgusted face like Erza. Wait…was that why she punched me? Was she randomly letting out her frustration and blaming it on something else? Why do you mock me, God? Rivers of tears fell my eyes as I rubbed my forehead.

  A low growl sounded the source: Nia.

  “Master.” Her growl deepened.

  “EEEK!” I shouted as I ran from Nia.

  “What were you about to say!? Are you flirting with other women!?” I jumped from table to table, Nia hot on my trail.

  GOD HELP ME!!

  “YAA!” I screamed as she pounced, pinning me to the table on my stomach.

  “You’re mine! Mine! Mine!” She closed in on my ear.

  “N-Nia! P-Please!” I heard her claws extend with a shing.

  “Say it!” She spat.

  “Say what?” I cried.

  “Say that you’re mine and that I’m yours!”

  She’s crazy!

  “Y-You are mine! I’m your owner!”

  “HISS! WRONG ANSWER!” She raised her claws.

  “I demand you to-HMPH!” Her tail shoved into my mouth.

  “Don’t you dare!”

  You asked for this!

  “NYAAA!” Her face turned red as I began playing with her tail with my tongue. “MMM!” I felt her stiffen on my back as her claws dug in. “AH!” She moaned as she began to shiver. “A-Almost…I-AH!” She fell flat on top of me. “AH! M-MYASHTER!” She drooled heavily.

  NOW!

  I rolled, forcing her off me as we both crashed to the ground. Nia quickly wrapped her legs around me and dug her claws into my shoulder as we found ourselves in a missionary position.

  “Myaster! Myas-“

  “NOT IN MY GUILD!”

  “AH! OOF! GAH!” Sabrina kicked me, sending me bouncing off the ground and into the wall. “What…did I…do…?” I groaned as I fell from the wall to the floor.

  “Master!” Nia ran to me. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m…fine.” I huffed.

  “We keep getting interrupted.” She purred as she squatted down and helped me up. “Maybe tonight we can actually finish.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Hehe.” She smiled. “The less you know, the more likely you are to do it.” I cocked my head in confusion.

  “Are you going to register or not?” I looked at Sabrina. Her lip had curled into a scowl, and I could tell she was getting fed up.

  “W-Well…” I looked at Nia. “I know you said you wanted to register with a different guild, but we’re already here, and we need the money to get you some clothes.”

  “You…care what I think?” Her eyes widened.

  “Well, yeah. Earlier, you said you wanted to register with a different guild. If it'll upset you, I don’t want to register with this one.”

  I don’t want you to hit me again. That’s what I was really saying, but if I said that, I was sure she’d hit me.

  “Oh, Master.” She purred as she held her hands to her chest. “I’m okay with whatever decision you make.”

  “All right then.” I looked at Sabrina. “Looks like we’re in.”

  “Ah. Ah. Ah.” Sabrina wiggled a finger. “It isn't that easy.”

  “Ah. An assessment?” I inquired.

  “Indeed. Indeed.” She smiled. “So?” She extended her arms. “Who will be your opponents?”

  “I get to pick?”

  “You do. Two.” She raised two fingers. “A one on one, and each of you gets to pick the opponent.”

  “Anyone?”

  “Anyone.”

  “Hmm.” I looked around.

  All the adventures looked way too eager to fight me like they wanted me to choose them just so they could beat my ass. I wondered why. Had I done something to piss them off? I doubted it. People always disliked me for one reason or another.

  With that said, being truthful, any one of them would destroy me in a fight. There wasn’t a single person in the guild that I could hold a candle to. So, with that being the case, I found the best option to be someone who stood out more than the others. Someone stronger than the rest. That way, when I did lose, they couldn’t blame me.

  "Heh.” I smiled fiendishly. “Sabrina!” I pointed at her. “I choose you!” She smiled at that. A smile much too frightening for my liking.

  Her fangs gleamed, and her eyes shone softly. “I was hoping you’d say that.” She walked closer. “There’s something about you. I can smell it.” She inhaled deeply before smiling again. “You’re strong.”

  Before I could tell her how wrong she was, another message appeared in my HUD.

  Heh. I smirked. That’s an easy one. The other answers were something I would never say, so I didn’t even bother to look at them. I said it before, and I’d say it again. I loved a challenge.

  “No,” I started, my eyes shining bright as I looked into hers. “You’re just weak.”

  Notice:

  All stats increased by 10

  Notice:

  Sabrina’s bond with you has increased. All stats have been increased by 5

  “Oh?” Sabrina’s hand gently rested on my chest. “I can’t wait to see what you can do.”

  “Don’t touch him!” Nyroc came crashing down between us as Nia hissed; however, Sabrina effortlessly caught him between two fingers before glaring at Nia.

  “I’m not your opponent, kitty pet.” She scoffed. “I’m his.”

  “IS THAT A CHALLENGE!” Nia spat. Sabrina only chuckled in response. “Fine! Then I chose her!” She pointed at Erza.

  “Oh?” Erza smiled. It looked like she accepted.

  “Good. Now, let’s head to the training grounds.” Sabrina motioned for us to follow, so we did, along with the rest of the guild, which was now buzzing in excitement.