Twas the night before school
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Not even a-
*Beep*
*Beep*
*Beep*
The fuck is that?
Opening my bloodshot eyes, I searched in vain for that most evil of sounds. It was the siren's call of the devil, luring me into hell. Also known as an alarm clock. But I can't for the life of me remember setting one. Though I was pretty tired last night with a pounding headache, so… maybe?
I reached over to where I thought the sound was coming from, but the alarm clock felt… off. Since when are they so furry? Or squirmy? Or squeaky? Just as I was starting to figure out something wasn't quite right, a sharp pain came from my hand.
"Ow! God damn it!" I yelled, sitting up, now much more awake than before. I looked at my hand and saw a bit of blood coming out of a fresh wound. It looked like something just took a bite out of me.
Looking over, I saw a rat hiss at me before scurrying away. I sat there, blinking uncomprehendingly as the large rodent fled to parts unknown. Once it was gone, I sighed, falling back into the soft embrace of my bed.
"Great and now I have rabies, just what I always wanted. Maybe I should get a cat? Wonder if Yoruichi's available?" I mumbled, letting out a big yawn. I then used my Healing Hands Ability to fix up my bleeding hand. I didn't see a pop up that said I actually have rabies, so I'm probably in the clear.
After that, I started looking around for the real culprit in all this. That accursed alarm clock that dared to awaken my slumber. Only to realize, I don't have an alarm clock, because I'm poor as shit. Or I was, but still! That only leaves one culprit.
"Sarah, the fuck?" I asked, staring up at my filth covered ceiling. The headache from last night was mostly gone, but I have a strange feeling that school would bring it back with a vengeance.
Hey, don't get mad at me. You were the one who told me to make sure you got up on time.
"That doesn't sound like me. Sleeping in is more my style. You know how I like to roll the dice with my bladder."
Well, you did. Now I suggest you start getting ready. You only have about 90 minutes before school starts.
"Are you telling me you got me up an hour before I needed to leave? For shame, Sarah, for shame. Don't you know highschool boys must scramble to be on time? You have destroyed a time honored tradition," I told her, and I could practically feel the roll of her eyes.
Women…
Get your lazy ass up before I start playing polka music.
"And here I thought torture was beneath you," I chirped, before forcing myself out of my nice, warm bed. I shivered as the chilly morning air bombarded my naked form. With another yawn, I made my way towards the bathroom, ready to give my toilet a golden shower.
After that, I took a nice, lukewarm shower, because my water heater freaking sucks. Though not for long. I may not have time now, but once I got home, it was time to install my pilfered goods and a fancy new water heater just so happened to be one of them. Hopefully it was the right size.
And if not, I'll make it. That's how plumbing works right? If it doesn't fit, force it. Pretty sure I read that in a book. Or was it a hentai…
Unfortunately, I was unable to wash off the damn hair Hiyori drew on my head last night. I tried, really I did, but it just wouldn't come off. Damn you Kisuke. Why would he even make a product like this? Was he drunk or something? Doesn't matter, I'll have to find something to cover it up, an act that pained me greatly.
After getting nice and clean, (mostly) I made my way to the kitchen. I then proceeded to pull some food out of my Inventory, so I could make breakfast, namely, omelets. I also plugged in my new toaster as well, making a couple pieces of unburnt toast. Yes, things are looking up for good old Ushio.
Once breakfast was cooked, I decided to finally take a look at my finished Quest and everything else I received from completing the Dungeon. It was quite a bit, not gonna lie. The first thing I noticed was a rather nice Stat boost.
Due to possessing the soul of a powerful spiritual being, increase Spirit by 20.
Hot damn! It's like I just gained an extra ten levels! I assume that's because of Hiyori forcing her soul into my body. Didn't think that would happen because of it, but I'm not complaining. I'll have to find some way to thank her later.
Then I remembered what she did to my beautiful bald head. No, I don't owe her shit.
Now for the Quest.
-Quest Complete-
Rescue Hiyori
Hiyori has been possessed by her Inner Hollow and it's all your fault. What are you going to do about it?
Reward
-Gain 5 Affection with Hiyori Sarugaki
-Gain 5 Affection with the rest of the Visoreds
-Gain 500 exp
-Gain 1 Ability Upgrade Token
-Gain 5 Spirit
-Evolutionary path unlocked: Visored
Bonus Rewards
For rescuing Kubikiri Orochi from her cell, you gain the following rewards.
-Gain 5 Affection to Kubikiri Orochi
-500 Exp
-Midlight Shard
-Gain 2 Power Crystals
-Gain 1 Item Upgrade Token
-Gain 1 Perk Point
-Piece of Elite Shadow Operative Gear
Secret Rewards
Didn't think it was possible, but you have tamed Hiyori's Inner Hollow, gaining the following rewards.
-Gain 5 Affection to Hiyori Sarugaki and Kubikiri Orochi
-Obtain Perk: Hollow Heart
-Gain 1,000 Exp
-Gain 3 Power Crystals
-Midlight Shard
-Gain 10,000 Yen
Hollow Heart
Makes controlling one's Inner Hollow much easier. Increases Affection gain with female Hollows by 1.
Ok, yep, that's a lot. My Spirit was looking pretty op right about now. I've basically tripled it during this little excursion. And I now have 5 whole Power Crystals to spend. Kinda wish they weren't random, but I can't complain too much. It's like gaining another 12 levels!
Speaking of, I was now Level 13 as well. Soon I would no longer be a bottom feeder, but an apex predator ready to fuck shit up. I'm looking at you Aizen, you dick!
And that Perk… Well I'm sure it'll be useful in the future, what with my ability to become a Visored unlocked without needing the Deus ex Machina that is the Hogyoku. Not sure how I feel about the second half of the Perk though… Oh well, maybe it'll save my life down the road.
Or get you laid.
"Yes, or get me-hey! Did you have something to do with this!" I asked. Demanded might be a better word for it.
How could you suggest such a thing? To accuse me, an angel, of such impropriety… The nerve!
"Ok, Sarah, your bullshit fake offended tone ain't fooling anyone."
Ignoring the horny angel living vicariously through me, I was also happy about getting two more Upgrade Tokens. I wanted to use them immediately, one on Shadow Double, because what a BS power that is, and the other on my bed, wanting to make it the ultimate sleep apparatus. But I held off, figuring I might have something better to spend it on.
And if not, bed it is!
I'm also 20% closer to being able to summon a giant snake, so that was neat. Just 7 more Midlight Shards and daddy had a new Ability. But with that, I think it's time to spend those Power Crystals. Fingers crossed for some more Intelligence!
Agility: plus 5
Strength: plus 5
Wisdom: plus 5
Strength: plus 5
Wisdom: plus 5
Ok, well, not the best, but I'll take it. With that done, let's take a look at ye old Stats, shall we?
Stats
Level: 13 (975/1,800)
Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.
Health: 662/662
Stamina: 389/389
Reiryoku: 1,184/1,184
Strength: 71
Agility: 32
Vitality: 39
Intelligence: 20
Wisdom: 40
Spirit: 77
Charisma: 8
Unused Points: 2
Man… being in a regular human body sure makes me feel weak. I was getting pretty used to seeing them with my Spirit and Equipment added, so to see my Health and Stamina so low…
I need to hit the gym, that's my takeaway from this. Not sure how much it will help, but the path of swole is a long and arduous one, filled with ups and downs, twists and turns. But as a staunch disciple, I shall not falter.
Finally, I took a gander at the final piece of the Silent One Equipment Set. Turns out, it was a scarf. Not sure if that's the best thing for a ninja to wear, and I have a sneaking suspicion that I was going to get it caught on something and choke myself out, but I couldn't deny the style points it gave me.
Or the set bonus, because that was apparently a thing too. This one gave me the Ability: Camouflage.
Camouflage
By standing completely still, allows one to blend in with their surroundings. Takes 10 seconds for the camouflage to take effect. Any sudden movement will cause the camouflage to end.
Ain't that nice? I'm becoming quite the ambush predator. Not sure how helpful it'll be in the long run, but more Abilities never hurt anyone. Unless, of course, they had too many and couldn't decide which one to use resulting in their untimely death. But what are the odds of that happening to me?
…Don't answer that.
Once breakfast was done, which I added a bit of extra protein to, (For the gains!) it was time to get ready. In other words, I should probably put on pants. I mean, I'm pretty sure I could take the cops if they tried to arrest me for indecent exposure, but I'd rather not have to deal with that so early in the morning.
Maybe later, but not right now.
I also needed to find something to cover up the travesty that was my head. What was normally a work of art was reduced to something even the proudest of parents wouldn't put on their fridge.
But alas, I could find nothing. Good thing I have gaming powers and can look shit up on the Shopping Menu. I didn't have time to look for long, so I ended up just getting a basic black beanie for 500 Yen. Thankfully it should be here before I have to leave.
Once that was done I decided to swap out my fridge for the stolen one that actually works, because mine is on its last legs. Better to do it now rather than later, as I do not want to come home to some expired milk. I'd replace everything else, but I don't have the time for that. Plus, this should make it nice and cold by the time I get back.
So I dragged the broken fridge away from the wall, unplugged it, and shoved it into my Inventory. Then, I took out the new one, plugged it in, and slid it back into place. The whole thing took about a minute. I had a small grin as I heard it start up without making a crackling sound.
Once that was done, I brushed my pearl whites and donned my uniform. It was a bit of a tight fit, what with my enormous muscles and all. And the less said about the tightness of the pants, the better. I also had on my Gigachad Ogre Loincloth, just in case I fuck up with the ladies.
Oh damn, was Sarah getting to me?
Muahahaha.
…No, couldn't be. Not wanting to mess up with cute girls is completely normal for a teenage boy. Yea, that's it. I'm not succumbing to my base desires to spread my seed far and wide.
Not at all. On an unrelated note, I'm looking forward to seeing Tatsuki again.
The last thing I did before leaving was Equipping my Silver Tongue Title. Figure it was my best bet since I likely won't be facing combat or anything.
It was during this time that my package arrived. I opened the door to see a small unmarked box. Kinda made me feel like I ordered something I wasn't supposed to. You know, some dark web shit. I took it inside before opening it, placing the beanie on my head with a frown.
I really do hate having to cover up something so beautiful. But needs must and all that.
As I left my "lovely abode" I made sure to lock the door before heading out. Not sure it would really do anything, as the lock was more decorative than anything else, but at least I can say I tried.
I winced slightly at the bright morning sun bitch slapped me. Maybe I should wage a crusade against it. Like, if I ever get yeeted into Star Wars I can steal the Death Star and blow up a few suns.
…Man, I'm sleepy. I'm not normally this megalomaniacal so early in the morning. Hopefully that'll pass by lunchtime. But considering I'm going to be in school, chances are it will only increase.
Eh, I'm sure it'll be fine.
I was about halfway to school, give or take, when I spotted a wild Tatsuki. I damn near gave a wolf whistle when I saw her in her school uniform. Dem legs... Not entirely sure how those skirts are legal, given they barely cover anything and the slightest breeze delivers all the fanservice a guy could want.
Unfortunately for me, the wind was as calm as could be. Because I can't have nice things apparently. But at the very least the hope it brought was keeping me up. Maybe I should have had some coffee rather than saké with my breakfast? Then again, I don't have a coffee machine.
Tatsuki seemed to be waiting for someone, if the impatient tapping of her foot was any indication. She also seemed to have a scowl on her face, glaring up at an apartment building.
It doesn't seem like she's noticed me yet, which gave me an idea. A large grin lit up my face as I quietly made my way towards the unsuspecting girl. Luckily for me, there didn't seem to be anyone around to warn her of what was about to happen.
Or call the cops, because I looked pretty darn suspicious. The worst part is that I wouldn't even be able to blame them. A 6'3" guy with muscles that belonged more on a comic book character than a real person sneaking up on a petite girl a foot shorter than him?
I can practically feel the cold, steel toilet against my ass as I try to poop. No thank you.
"Will you hurry up already!? We're going to be late!" Tatsuki shouted. For a second, I thought she was talking to me. But given that she didn't look in my direction, I have to assume she was talking to whoever was in the building.
Perfect, that means my surprise is intact.
I reached her just as she was about to yell at the building once again, and wrapped my hands around her eyes.
"Hey Tatsuki! Guess wh-urgh!"
So I may have made a teeny, tiny miscalculation. I have forgotten that Tatsuki is a violent tomboy. And how do violent tomboys react when somebody they aren't aware of puts their hand on them?
-36 Hp
If you answered an elbow to the ribs, congratulations, you win!
"Wha? Ushio!? The hell do you think you're doing?" she asked, hands on her hips. Guess she doesn't feel bad about dropping me.
"Making bad choices," I wheezed out, clutching my poor side. It wasn't like it did any real damage, but I wasn't prepared for it either.
"Clearly. You should know better than to sneak up on a girl like that," she said, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Most girls can't drop me with an elbow," I argued back. She rolled her eyes but she did have a small blush on her face. Did she think that was a complement? Well if she did, I sure as hell wasn't going to say anything to the contrary.
"You may have a point. Anyway, I'm glad to see you didn't die last night," she said.
"Aw, were you worried about me? How sweet," I said, making her blush even harder.
"Worried? About you? Psh, as if," she claimed, looking away. I chuckled a bit at her tsundere side, before giving her a curious look.
"So, is there some reason you're shouting at a building at this godforsaken hour?" I asked. This actually made her give a sigh.
"Yeah, I'm waiting on a friend of mine. She overslept and now she can't get her clothes right, apparently," Tastuki said, sounding frustrated. Man, being a girly girl sounds like hell.
"How can she not get her clothes right?" I asked, sounding genuinely confused. Tatsuki gave me a look, one that said I was an idiot. She then gave me a once over and I could see the disappointment in her eyes.
"Not wrinkled, for one. And what's with your tie?" she asked, making me look at my appearance. Ok, so I wasn't at the top of my game. If she knew all the crap I had to put up with last night, she wouldn't be so judgmental. But even so, I didn't really see the problem.
"What's wrong with my tie?" I asked. Now her look was one of disbelief and exasperation.
"I think the better question is, what's right with it? Come here, let me fix it," she said. Shrugging, I stepped towards the cute, petite girl. She reached up and adjusted my tie, making sure it was put on properly, and not all cockeyed.
"There we go," she said, patting the tie down. Her hands remained resting on my chest as she gave me a smile. I couldn't help but think of how pretty she looked.
"Uh, thanks," I said, a bit of red in my own cheeks now. Did she even realize how close we are? How intimate that whole thing was? Or did she have her tomboy blinders on?
Just as I was about to say something, not sure what exactly, a new voice interrupted our moment.
"Um, Tatsuki? Who's this?"
The two of us turned to see a confused looking girl with bright orange hair and huge boobs. I didn't look right at them, of course, as Tatsuki was well within striking distance of my balls, but my peripherals let me know all about them.
Tatsuki, who finally seemed to realize how close she was, turned as red as I've ever seen her and jumped away like a cat getting sprayed with water. Well at least she didn't punch me again.
"Oh, Orihime, I didn't see you there. How are you?" Tatsuki stammered, nervously.
"I'm good. How are you?" asked the bubbly girl, a big smile on her face. You couldn't see it, because of the beanie, but I'm sweat dropping right now. Did she already forget about me? Was that even possible? Was she a goldfish or something?
"Oh, me? Good, I'm good," Tatsuki responded.
"That's good," said Orihime.
"Uh, I'm good too. Not that anybody asked," I said, raising my hand. Orihime gave me a surprised look, while Tatsuki levelled me with a glare. Not sure what I did to deserve that, but fine.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. How rude of me," Orihime said, sounding genuinely remorseful. I could only blink in response, not sure what I'm supposed to say to that. Tatsuki herself let out another exasperated sigh, but at least it wasn't because of me this time.
"You don't need to apologize. Anyway, let me introduce the two of you. His name is Ushio. Don't let his size fool you, he's just a big old softy," she said, pointing to me with her thumb. I did my best to glare at her, but I don't think it did anything.
"And this is Orihime, my best friend. So don't get any funny ideas, got it?" Tatsuki warned, placing her arm around her friend's shoulder. I could only roll my eyes at her threat.
"Wouldn't think of it, Tatsuki. I'm more into tomboys anyway," I said, giving her a smirk, making her face once more turn red.
"Anyway, it's nice to meet you, Orihime," I said, holding out my hand for her to shake, which she did so with a bit of confusion mixed in with no small amount of joy.
"It's nice to meet you too. So Tatsuki, is this the boy you were telling me about?" Orihime asked. I could see in real time as the tomboy's face morphed into a look of mortification. It was highly entertaining.
"Oh, and just what have you been saying about me?" I asked, a shit eating grin on my face.
"None of your business! Come on, Orihime!" Tatsuki said, grabbing the befuddled girl by the arm and dragging her away. I chuckled as I followed.
It was pretty interesting listening to the near insane babblings of Orihime. Pretty sure she thinks I'm some kind of luchador. Maybe I can make that theory come true when I eventually make it to the underground fighting arena.
For the lolz.
Eventually, we came across another familiar face.
"Hey, Ichigo," I greeted as he walked out of his house gate. Tatsuki and Orihime came to a stop, with Orihime hiding behind Tatsuki. Given that her face wasn't beat red, I assume she has yet to develop a crush on him.
"Oh, hey. What are you all doing here?" Ichigo asked.
I shrugged, "Just heading to jail. I mean hell. I mean school." The others gave a little chuckle at that, except for Orihime. Pretty sure Tatsuki said something about her being excited about school, so she was the outlier. Everyone else knew what a horrible institution school was.
"Oh yeah? Not sure I want to go to any of those," Ichigo mentioned, as we all started walking again, with me next to Ichigo, who was on the far right, Tasuki on my left and Orihime next to her.
"Believe me, you're not the only one. Half tempted to skip and battle it out with the truant officers. Go down in a blaze of glory, you know?" I said.
"Sounds like more fun than school," Ichigo commented.
"What's wrong with school?" Orihime asked, sounding genuinely curious. Might have to get this girl to a priest, cause it sounds like she's speaking in tongues.
"Nothing at all Orihime, they're just being boys," Tatsuki assured her.
"I'll remember you said that when we're studying for a test," I snarked, getting a tongue pointed in my direction. Real mature.
"By the way what's up with that beanie?" Ichigo asked.
Shit, that's the one thing I didn't want them to be curious about. He could have asked about my health after his sister fed me poison, but no. It's all about the damn beanie.
"You know, I've been wondering the same thing," Tatsuki said, giving me a curious look. And wouldn't you know it, Orihime piled right on in too. Great, now I need to think of something, and quick!
"Um… skin cancer," I stated. That was not the answer I should have given. Not even my Title was going to help me now.
"Skin cancer…" Tatsuki repeated, and I could hear the disbelief in her voice.
"Listen, you might not know this as someone with a natural head covering, but the threat of skin cancer is a real issue for someone like me," I commented, sounding just about as offended as I could.
Tatsuki and Ichigo shared a look. "Right…" they both said.
For a moment, I thought that would be the end of it. For one blissful, ignorant moment. But just as soon as it appeared, it was over.
"Let me see," Tatsuki demanded, reaching up to grab the beanie off my head. Unfortunately for her, I was too fast, and I managed to grab onto it, preventing her sneaky hands from taking their prize.
"Hey, stop that! Are you trying to kill me!?" I asked, jumping away from her.
"How is taking that thing off your head going to kill you?" Tatsuki asked, adopting a ready position, an eager grin on her face.
"I told you already, skin cancer! Just because I'll die slowly, doesn't mean it wouldn't be your fault!" I shouted, as the two of us began circling each other. One looking to escape, and the other seeking to embarrass the first.
"Oh come on, I know you're hiding something! Just let me see," Tatsuki demanded, lunging for me. Unfortunately for her, I have gained much in the way of experience since last night, and I dodged to the left, taking off at a run.
"Somebody help! The tomboy is picking on me!" I shouted as I ran away, said tomboy hot on my heels.
"Get back here!" she shouted.
Ichigo and Orihime exchanged a look, with the big boobied girl giving him a nervous smile. "Should we… do something?" she asked, sounding unsure. Ichigo only sighed, looking bored by the whole thing.
"I'm not getting involved in whatever that is," he said, before casually continuing his walk to school. Orihime wasn't sure what to make of that, but when she realized that she was the only one left standing there, she panicked.
"Hey! Wait for me!" she shouted, racing to catch up to us.
The first day of school was looking to be interesting at the very least. Hopefully I can get through it with my dignity intact.
Ah hell, did I just raise another flag?