Chapter 3: Just Voodoo It

  Dark and Askal wait behind the balete tree, hiding in the shadows with their sniper rifles pointed at an old mansion, looking similar to newly renovated ones you see now acting as tourist spots in Ilocos. Very old and beautiful buildings are just surrounding them, and they are silently prepared to shoot.

  The congressman came from a limousine with his wife and three mistresses, along with his children.

  Hercules sighed, hiding with Dark, watching from the bushes using his telescopic vision.

  Askal sighs, standing up. “Imma take a piss.”

  She walks away, and Dark just breathes shakily.

  Hercules turns to Dark. “You’re okay?”

  “No. The fuck. Our boss wants us to murder an entire fucking family. CHILDREN.”

  “Not everyone… in this team… agrees… with his methods.”

  “Why?”

  “They’re called Shroomen. And we need them dead.”

  “Okay. I like that they’re called that. Now, EXPLAIN THE FUCKING CONTEXT.”

  “I don’t know anything either.”

  “Don’t you have super hearing and telepathy?”

  “Our boss is really good. Can’t hear him whisper about the Shroomen, nor can I even hear his thoughts.”

  “How the fuck can you NOT hear his thoughts!?”

  “I have no idea, man.”

  “Fuck!” Dark facepalmed.

  “I thought you were a killer.”

  “I don’t kill kids just because some guy thinks it’s the right thing to do for whoever the fuck for.”

  “Hm,” said Hercules.

  Hercules and Dark silently looked in the distance.

  Hercules side eyes Dark, looking at Dark’s lips and smooth skin, and down to his molecules and atoms.

  Dark smirks, turning to him. “I mean. Some things do keep me at ease.”

  Hercules smirks. “That so?”

  Dark’s eyes widened as they entered the mansion, now seen at the window, all of which changed the way they walked. Instead of having the demeanor of a corrupt poolitician with depressed children, they all walk in a file.

  Dark asks. “The fuck?”

  “I think we should kill them,” said Askal. “Something’s… wrong with them.”

  “Askal. You said it yourself. We don’t kill kids.”

  “Yeah. But fucking something is wrong with that. Look! They aren’t using bagoong! What kind of sick family DOES THAT!?!?”

  “That isn’t grounds for murder. It’s the fact we suspect their status as Shroomen.”

  “The fuck are Shroomen?” asked Askal.

  “Mhm… Yeah,” said Hercules. “Habagat says to kill all of them.”

  “Oh. NOW you hear the whispers.”

  “Not for the Shroomen. Just\-... Dude. Do it.”

  Dark begins hyperventilating.

  Askal facepalms and grabs a sniper rifle. “I’ll do it… Fuck…”

  “Askal?” asked Hercules, seeing her eyebrow twitch. “Askal. Breathe.”

  “I’m cool.”

  “You don’t look cool. Just breathe, dude.”

  Askal sighs.

  “What happened!?” asked Habagat, in the van nearby.

  Kagitingan turns to her and shakes his head.

  Habagat facepalms. “Fuck. Shit. Why won’t she shoot!?”

  Hercules grabs her shoulder. “Calm… down…”

  Suddenly, they hear screeching in the distance.

  Askal looks back through the telescope. No one is there. “Fuck. They’re gone.”

  Hercules holds his fists up.

  Dark takes out his katana as two children and three women, screeching like animals, attack Askal and Hercules.

  Dark backs away. “Is that a fucking Alamanhig!?”

  ”Oh… Shroomen are Alaman-...” Hercules punches the child to the ground as he regenerates and crawls on all fours like a spider, hissing at him.

  “What are they!?” asked Askal, shooting at a mistress who regenerates.

  The Alamanhig bites her, and she feels a tickling sensation that makes her laugh uncontrollably.

  Dark spills his own blood at the wound, as she heals immediately.

  Askal gasps as the children begin beating her down.

  “FUCK!!!” yelled Askal.

  Suddenly, the Alamanhigs began ripping her hair out before leaving, waddling away and returning to the “Wife”.

  Her “husband”, whose eyes are tucked in while looking up so much so that only the eyeball can be seen, groans and waddles toward them, holding a knife. They walked stiffly, with their limbs stiff and bodies stiffly upright.

  They charge, waddling forward and screaming with their bloody teeth out, and stab at Hercules over and over, even causing him to bleed somehow.

  “Fuck…” said Hercules. “Demon Blood…”

  The children laugh as the tallest one, the congressman, headbutts Dark over and over.

  Dark backs away. “This one’s different from the others. Fuck. Kinulam…”

  The Congressman screeches with bloody lips and beats Dark and Askal down to the ground.

  The Congressman even bites into Dark’s throat, forcing Dark to stab him into the brainstem, but he kept on beating Dark, so Askal takes out a grenade as the Congressman, trying to chomp her, bites into the grenade and his head blows up, brains everywhere, but the headless body keeps beating the pair down.

  Dark turns to Hercules, who is still getting stabbed. “Kill them. They’re fucking zombies.”

  Hercules, now with blood leaking out from his abs, is forced to blast heat vision at the children, killing them all.

  The trio, beaten and bruised, then face the Congressman’s wife, who just waltzes next to them.

  “Hello!” smiled the elderly woman. “Hi! Would you like to come in?”

  Dark takes out his katana to try to kill her, but then she grabs a doll made of twigs and snaps his arms’ bones by snapping a twig of the doll.

  Dark booms roaring, falling to his knees.

  She snaps the fish spine of the doll, and snaps Dark’s own spine backwards.

  Askal takes out a bolo and prepares to kill her.

  The witch smiles and prepares to cut off the doll’s head with a pair of scissors.

  Askal’s nose twitches.

  “Aw! Your eyes… I don’t see a killer. All I see are two traumatized children… who failed to grow up.”

  Askal’s eyes quivered. Her breath is shaky.

  “Well?” asked Askal, lips twitching. “Dark? Didn’t this bitch invite us for dinner?”

  Dark snaps his body back to normal, forcefully, regenerating.

  Hercules backs away in horror.

  “Aw! A demigod! Good thing you’re part Human. I have three dolls for you. Possibly even more.”

  ”Fuck…” said Dark, backing away.

  Askal sighs, leading the way, and the trio walks into the mansion.

  Sitting down at the table, the trio just looked closely at the witch.

  “They say that Filipinos have too many politicians. Especially in recent times, no?”

  The trio looked at each other before going about. Dark was bouncing his leg and looking around. Hercules was just locked in, staring at her. Askal, meanwhile, was just ignoring everything, merely listening.

  “Why are you in my house? Hm? You killed my alipin and fucked with me? Who the fuck are you?”

  Hercules answered. “We are a task force working for Maharlica-152. We were tasked with assassinating you because you have something to do with this Earth’s Shinpinoshima.”

  “‘This Earth’s’…” she quoted before chuckling. “You realize that this Earth is much, much more important than many other Earths, right? Earth-777. One of the many Earths of the universe, very similar to the famous Earth-152. Prior to B-Day.” Her eyes look up at their faces. “Breakdown day.” She furthered. “Your little hero task force is absolutely pathetic. Absolutely pathetic. You realize what I am, right? I mean. Now…”

  “Yes. You’re a Mangkukulam. You use a portion of the primordial power of evil known as self-faith, Kulam, which allows you to tap into a force of extreme power, letting you bend reality to your will. Though it takes away much more of your humanity, eating away what’s left of it the more you tap into this power.”

  “Well, least I’m not a Martian Colonist, no?”

  “Hahahahhahaha!” Askal laughed. “Oh. Wonderful, yeah? You think that bewitching people is an argument of order?”

  “Among other things…” she tapped her fingers across the table. Her eyes widened psychotically. “I had my husband hammer his skull down into one of those mistresses.”

  “Why did you kill your own family?”

  She smiles. “Those aren’t my family. Just a political dynasty filled with aristocrats I enjoyed murdering. Just for fun! I’m their stepmother, as they call it.”

  “You murdered those children,” said Dark.

  “Political Younglings, if ever! I am trying my best to save this country. My husband was… weak, for lack of a better term. He was too afraid to accept his calling to join his empire.”

  “Whose empire?” asked Hercules.

  This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

  “You really were just pulled into this war without knowing anything, hm? Ever heard of the King of Shinpinoshima?”

  “Our butler came from there,” said Dark. “He’s gone now, but he was the one who trained us with the arts.”

  “Sorry. Aren’t you two siblings?” asked the witch.

  “Not exactly. I am John Stevenson. Crashlanded on the island when I was six. Adopted by the blacksmith Daisuke, who became her butler and father figure, prior to our current adoptive father, the Buwaya…”

  “Ah, yes! You two killed Daisuke.”

  “He made us do it,” said Dark, furrowing his eyebrows and standing up.

  “His blood is in your hands, though,” said the witch. “I’m not surprised. After all, you two are children, each given a revolver. I don’t think you’d ever be-...”

  Dark slams the table, angrily.

  The witch smiles, and somehow, Hercules’ wrist is shattered.

  Dark frowns. “I’m sorry.”

  Hercules grunts, but immediately heals from the witch.

  “So, you’re the King’s accomplice.”

  “Oh, no, no, no! If anything, I’m just here to fuck with him! I am far too scared to even fight him, myself, indeed! My goodness! I am technically on your side. The Congressman was afraid, so he went to Shinpinoshima to partake in stealing funds from our government to use them for his own gain. He got scared… So he went to the King for help. The King had my children killed with this moron. So, I married him, killed his children, and the rest is history.”

  “We’re still gonna kill you for killing those innocent children,” said Askal.

  “How?” smirked the witch.

  Suddenly, a dagger slams into her face, killing her.

  The dagger was from Dark’s monkey-like tail.

  “Well, you probably didn’t know this. My brother… is… half Aswang.“

  The witch wheezed and fell to the ground, crawling away.

  “I don’t kill children. Child killers deserve to fucking die,” she said, holding a knife at her face before cutting out her ear. “I’m called a street dog for a reason, bitch… You fucked with the wrong bitch.”

  “He was corrupt-...”

  Askal cut her more. “Those children were innocent. And I will enjoy doing this for them…”

  The witch whimpered, cried, before wheezing her last breath. “You two are nothing but… pieces of shit…”

  Askal’s eyes quivered as she delivered the finishing blow.

  Later… back at the compound, the siblings sigh, sleeping on separate beds in the same room.

  “What’s wrong?” asked Dark.

  “I’m beginning to think we’re fucking maniacs,” said Askal.

  Dark sighs. “You think so, too?”

  Askal nods. She keeps her mouth under the sheets and peers out from the darkness. “Dad made us kill Daisuke.”

  “Dad is a racist psychopath who thinks killing Daisuke, a Shinpinoshiman, was the right call.”

  “You ever think we should’ve joined the Black Spiral? We… were told by Unbreakable that hope is meant to be enforced. I agreed with it for the most part. But something felt off… killing that one guy. Reaper. It almost felt like he was a good person. And we killed him for the wrong reasons.”

  Dark sighs. “We’ve killed a lot more for Stefan.”

  “But he… died… begging. I didn’t… I didn’t like that.”

  “What’s your point?”

  “I think I don’t wanna kill people no more.”

  Dark closes his eyes. He rolls over, turning away from her and falling asleep.

  Askal closed her eyes…

  She remembered Daisuke…

  Daisuke smiled, patting her head, while the two siblings laughed while he trained them both.

  Daisuke smiled, patting John’s head.

  John asks. “Can I get ice cream after all this?”

  “Ah, ah… You can’t have too many sweets, kid…”

  Emilia smiles, hugging Daisuke, giggling. “Was I a good strike?”

  “Yes, you were, love!” laughed Daisuke, before seeing a bruise on her shoulder. He sighs, and warmly puts the bruise on ice. “This from our training?”

  Emilia looks down.

  “Em?”

  “My Daddy’s really mad sometimes…”

  Daisuke’s smile faded away. “I’ll have a word with him… Just… clean your brother's wounds, okay?”

  “I wish you were my Dad,” she sighed.

  Suddenly, Mister Li enters the vicinity. “Excellent,” said Mister Li. “A word with you, Daisuke?”

  The two siblings are seen ripping their hair out, strands falling from their scalp ,while they hear their father yell at them, berating the poor foreigner.

  “I was hired and told to train your child. Not whatever the hell this is… You’re training them for nefarious purposes-...”

  “FUCK!!!” Mr. Li slams his fist into Daisuke’s face.

  “Daddy?” asked a younger Emilia, Askal, who watches her father beat Daisuke and strangle him on the floor.

  He hands the two screwdrivers. “Kill him.“

  A younger John whimpers. “He’s my Dad.”

  “Yeah. Well, this fucking putrid Shimmy is going to fuckin’ die and I’m your new daddy. Lest you wanna fucking die like the pussy you are.” The old man places a blade by his neck.

  Daisuke tears up. “Mister Li. Don’t do this… They’re children.”

  “Do it, you fuckin’ f**.”

  Dark and Askal are born as they approach their father figure. Daisuke smiles, touching their cheeks while they cried for him. “It’s going to be okay. I will meet you in Langit. I love you two…”

  “Do it, or I’ll slit your throats…” smirked Mister Li.

  Daisuke, to make it easier for them, holds their hands while the screwdriver approached his chest.

  And… they stabbed…

  Askal can be heard crying in her bed, whimpering, while Dark pretended to sleep.

  Chapter 4: Bad Parenting

  Dark and Askal are given new folders. So are Hercules and Kagitingan.

  Kagitingan smiles. “Boy! Is this our next target?”

  “No. This is your next assignment. You’re going to be assassinating the leader of the island of Shinpinoshima. In the name of Maharlica-152. The US President is especially interested with building military bases on the island.”

  Dark facepalms. “Okay. There’s gonna have to be some fucking weird supernatural twist here. I’m not doing what you’re telling me to do lest I’m well-informed. You saw what happened back then with the Congressman. So…” He stares down Habagat. “Talk.”

  “Fine. Seems we can trust you enough with this. Your next target is the leader of the most powerful tribe of Shinpinoshima. Shinpinoshima is made of seven kingdoms known as Barangays, similarly to our own Barangays, but with a key difference. More tribal and primitive systems with medieval weapons mixed with some advances in military. Your target is the island’s most powerful leader, known as Heneral Ahasan. A very powerful Samurai known to control all types of metal.”

  “So, how the hell are we supposed to kill him without weapons?”

  “That’s where you two come in. He’s working with a powerful Pantheon. Ares.”

  Hercules gulps. “Ares is a part of this?”

  “I am… well aware of your personal history with Ares. But General Ahasan, also known as Metal Kobra, had a certain deal with him. Linking to something likely cosmic with the Pantheons. We need both of them dead. Heard that there’s this politician working with them. We don’t know who. That informative enough for you?” asked Habagat.

  “Yeah,” said Dark. “You want us to kill the Pantheon. Fine. Just no FUCKING kids.”

  “Psh,” mocked Habagat. “The ones you killed weren’t kids.”

  “And you didn’t tell us,” said Askal.

  Hercules’ nose twitched. “They’re right. Inform us next time.”

  Habagat shook her head. “Just fucking board the plane, you fucking twats.”

  In the private jet, the team silently looks at each other.

  Hercules facepalms while looking outside.

  Dark speaks up. “Hey.“

  Herc turns to Dark. “What?”

  “Sorry for being such a horny douche then,” said Dark.

  Hercules smiles softly, looking down. “It’s cool.”

  Dark sighs.

  “Thanks for uh… standing up to Habagat. I don’t usually stand up to people like that.”

  “Y’know, I read about you in Greek Mythos.”

  “You did, huh?”

  “Mhm. Is it true you killed your family?”

  ”Mhm. I was possessed by my Dad’s wife slash sister. My Human mother mourned with me. Killed my family and went full wacko. Had to do 12 labors. They used to call it Hero Work. Absolute bullshit. But… Here I am. I went to Earth-777 in the 1930s… and I have protected Earth ever since as a Superhero. I tried making up for my mistakes but… I feel like… By giving people hope, maybe… just maybe…”

  “I get it.”

  “Psh. No, you don’t.”

  “No. My main thing is cherishing hope with all my heart.”

  “You kill people in your dumbass detective costume.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Don’t let that shit get to you… Or you’d be just as bad as Unbreakable.”

  “Mmm…”

  Kagitingan just keeps smiling, looking outside.

  Askal sighs. “So, what’s your deal, anyway?”

  “I’m an Ubermensch. Injected with the Ambrosia Serum, giving me Superpowers back in World War II. Basically, a serum derived from the blood of demigods.”

  “Oh. So, you’re a Bayani, right?”

  “No, I uh… originally worked for the Hapones, but my brain was reprogrammed by the United States government to blow up two Japanese cities. They called it nukes, but in this Earth, it was me.”

  “Shit, dude,” said Askal.

  “Yeah. I dream about dying, my dude.”

  “Eh! Just a regular Tuesday in this world for… guys like us. Heh.” She smiled.

  He smiled back. “I wish… wasn’t… one…”

  “Neither do I,” smiled Askal. “Friend?” Askal offered her hand.

  He smiled. ”A-Okay!” He shook her hand.

  Suddenly, the jet began shaking.

  Dark and Hercules look outside.

  “Just some turbulence. Relax,” said Askal.

  Kagitingan stands up. “No, it isn’t…”

  Suddenly, the jet explodes while both pilots scream with their faces cut in half, and the four heroes are forced to drop off. Dark releases his bat wings and grabs Askal, flying away.

  Hercules and Kagitingan fly away as well.

  The creature that ate their helicopter, the Bakunawa, slithered around while Dark took out his katana and stabbed it in the eye. Askal backflips and slides backward, down its slithering back, and stabs it.

  Dark transforms into an Aswang and shrieks, roaring and shoots out into the skies, only for the Bakunawa to boom and spit out boiling hot water that scathes Hercules and Kagitingan.

  Hercules roars and blasts heat vision at the Bakunawa, which weaves around in the air and maneuvers toward eating Kagitingan, who punches the beast with a heavy punch.

  Hercules screams out. “WHY IS THERE A GIANT FUCKING JORMUNGANDER!?!?”

  “It’s a Bakunawa! Moon eater! Eats asteroids in SPAAAA-!!!” Kagitingan is whipped away into a satellite.

  Meanwhile, Dark and Askal climb with their blades, inching toward the giant creature’s throat.

  The Bakunawa screeches out loud as Dark yells out, “SLAYER SLASH!!!” Where his katana slashes a blade-shaped shockwave out from his katana and slits the creature’s throat. Askal roars and runs around the back as she activates her jetpack and tosses a strange Chewtoy-like bomb into its throat.

  Askal sneers. “Got that dog in me, MOTHERFUCKER!!!” she roared, as the Doggie Bomb blows up the insides of the giant Bakunawa.

  The four of them land on the shorelines of the beach, emerging from the shore’s waters, stomping into the beach and into the tropical forest, only to encounter a colossal team of soldiers armed with guns and blades all pointed at them.

  ”Fuck…” said Hercules. “Guys. I think we’re gonna have to fight our way out of this.”

  “How the hell did we not hear these guys?” asked Kagitingan.

  Askal smiles and tosses Doggie Bombs out of her cape that stabs their faces, each blowing up as Dark takes his katana out and keeps blasting bladed shockwaves at the enemy.

  Hercules blasts at them, melting them with heat vision along with Kagitingan.

  The soldiers, all of them, are wiped out.

  The four of them reach a cabin, where there they can finally rest for the night…

  “Fuck…” said Hercules. “Hey, guys? You all good? Dark, what the hell are you doing over there?”

  “I made sweet and spicy pork skewers,” said Dark.

  Hercules is given a skewer and cheers with him.

  Dark smiles. “Consider this a sequel to the apology. Heh…”

  Hercules laughs.

  Kagitingan listens to Buwan.

  “You guys like Buwan?” smiled Askal.

  “Heh… Yeah…” said Hercules. ”’Buwan’. Your word for ‘Moon’, right?”

  “Why does Habagat want Ahasan dead?”

  “Ahasan is a dictator of Shinpinoshima,” said Hercules.

  “That’s it?”

  “Well… The US wants control over the South SIno Sea. Isn’t this good for the Philippines?”

  “‘Good for the Philippines…’” scoffed Dark.

  While Askal and Kagitingan kept singing around the campfire, Dark looked at the ground, which Hercules noticed. Dark kept staring at the bugs in the soil, killing each other. “The good for the Philippines isn’t exactly good for the people.”

  “What? If America has the island, then the sea, the Philippines gets the resources.”

  “But America gets most of the real estate. It’s just a whole ‘nother colonization effort by the Americans.”

  Hercules looks down. “Thought you were Pro-Filipino, Pro-American Patriotic… clown… whatever…

  “I’m beginning to… think…”

  “Like with those kids? You didn’t kill them. Thought you’d do anything for hope.”

  “Yeah, well. Psh! They’re zombies anyway… Fuck it.”

  Hercules smiles and stands up to walk back into the cabin. Then Dark opened his mouth. “I don’t wanna kill people anymore. Neither does Askal.”

  Hercules stops. He turns to Dark. “Don’t go Pacfist Route on us, dude. Not now. Because… they’ll kill us if we don’t kill the Dictator.”

  “Something isn’t right about this mission.”

  “It’s simple. It’s just another way of America ruling over your country, like you said.”

  Dark sighs. “Heh. You said, ‘your country’.”

  “Mmm. You’re Filipino, right?”

  “Have you ever had a bad… parent?”

  “Yes,” said Hercules. “My… father is not a kind man.”

  “Well, I was taken in by a man who forced me and my current sister to kill a man I considered my father.”

  “It was not your fault. Your father would kill you if you were a child. Do not let that shit define every action you do. Every choice you make.”

  “Well… You may be right about that ,but something IS off. It’s like America is a bad parent to its own child, the Philippines. It ain't even its kid! It kinda just kidnapped it and forced it to act with its culture, and now we’re slaves! For fuck’s sake! Look at our music! Pop culture! We like American bullshit like Marvel, or or or DC or or or fucking Hanoi Rocks! Or AC/DC!!!”

  “What’s your point?”

  “I don’t wanna do what my country tells me to do if it’s just another way for it to make a fool of itself.”

  Hercules sighs.

  “And it wants me to kill? Fuck that. I don’t want to kill. I always wanted to rehabilitate offenders… Because I always believed in redemption when I was younger. And and and it sucks that… I’m a fuckin’... whatever I am…”

  “You really are a good guy,” sighed Hercules.

  “I’m not… I’m-...”

  “You are… 90% a piece of shit. But… You’re good… 10% of the time. So’s your sister.”

  Dark tears up. “I’ve done some mistakes.”

  “What’s the plan then?”

  “We talk to the Dictator. I’d much prefer that over just… fucking killing him because someone else tells me it’s the right thing to do.”

  “Your… Dad sounds like an asshole.”

  Dark scoffs. “Duh…”