She’s hysterical and then sees her sister shivering in the corner.
Caladblock: “YOUUUU—WHAT HAPPENED!?!”
Whalescalibur: “If I don’t move... maybe the storm will just pass me by...”
A miasma slaps her cute pommel.
Whalescalibur: “KYAAAAAA! It didn’t work!!!”
Such a disappointing sister.
Caladblock: “WHAT HAPPENED?!?”
Whalescalibur: “I tried to warn him... he doesn’t listen to me and just walked into this situation! I, uh... kinda shut up to see what would happen at the end...”
mumbling that final part.
Another slap.
Caladblock: “I’M SAVING MY KNIGHT!!!”
Whalescalibur: “NOOOOOO! You’ll break him if you rush! His mind is trapped in simulated realspace. We may lose him... forever!”
Whalescalibur makes sense for the first time in a while. Caladblock freezes at the rare logical moment her sister displays.
Caladblock: “...Ok ok ok ok okkkk, kkkk—OKAY.”
Then suddenly, a dark idea bubble pops above her head. A string of cursed miasma infiltrates the VR set and infects the daemonic servers. This insidious malware begins corrupting the game—blocking all mages from using their powers and locking out store points permanently.
When that happens, the whales start screaming and convulsing just like Hajime-san.
Their bodies are in sync… but for completely different reasons.
Lucile-chan: “CALL THE SLOP SUPPORT!!!”
…It was a futile call.
A dark, ominous cloud wraps around the entirety of the world. Magic has been nerfed, again...
Was it a patch gone wrong? No one knows really the minds of the developers.
Suddenly, a strange apparition appears—a new character:
A beautiful pirate girl, attacking players indiscriminately, permanently nerfing their ad-acquisition stats.
At first, the attacks seemed random. But over time… a pattern appeared.
She’s following Hajime’s exact conquest route. Trying to find her one true master...
The Rats, the Roaches, and the Silverspoons all gather amidst the ashes of Lucielvagrod.
They are united in absolute despair.
But in the darkness, they discover something magical… friendship among scum.
This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.
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The cheese is shared equally.
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The Roaches reveal their deepest escape tactics.
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The Silverspoons LARP about their useless chibi companions.
Together, they form a Unified Daemonic Army. With horse armor in all its glory!
Their war caravan rolls toward the human kingdoms on a just quest to destroy the evil monster that ruined their once shared paradise.
At the center of the army is a suspicious carriage that constantly plays cheese and marketing jingles on a 24/7 rotation.
Another city lies before Hajime-san. The exact same three houses, two generic merchants and a "dingy mage tower?"
He tries to enter the location.
System: “Level 250 Required.”
Hajime: “Pfft, give me something harder!”
He pushes through a sickly ad membrane protecting the entrance of this town, it pops satisfyingly like a bottle of glass.
Inside the settlement:
Busty ad-mage girls and bloated otaku ad-mages congregate in the center.
Hajime does his standard routine.
The mage tower falls with crappy fall physics.
What Hajime doesn't notice is that in his rampage he unfortunately triggered a delayed trap—set by the Predictive Algomages who analyze the general metavictim behavioral algomagics.
Ding: “Magiads Conquest Complete!”
Reward: A sticker: “GET JUCKED, SON.”
The town burns to the ground, one more city remains to finish this journey.
Just as Hajime steps out, a gigantic magic ad in the form of a perfect square terraforms the region into an empty plain with a single basement door.
He ignores it, obviously.
He takes ten steps north—he suddenly falls into a pit.
He lands in a procedurally generated dungeon full of village girls and feet ads.
Hajime rages at this development. He eventually escapes through the former basement door.
He is now delayed for one full game year inside an ad maze of falling pits and stagnant trauma.
The new girl’s name is Luna. A thief who claimed to steal from the rich and give to the poor.
She says her village was destroyed by an overwhelming monster.
Paul sympathizes with her plight. He takes her in as a fateful companion… but something feels off about her.
She’s bratty, selfish, and constantly eyeballing his sword.
Honestly, Paul thinks she was the only poor one there. Because what can explain why she is staring at him so much?
Now turning into a sus edgelord (thanks to XP-devouring soul trauma), Paul and his party travel to warn the capital of Whalespool.
Our Hero has completed many quests:
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Saved the Water Princess
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Communed with the One True Goddess
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Completed all loyalty side quests
Now Level 450. A true edgelord max hero.
He is:
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Haunted by Childhood Friend Village Girl 1
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Comforted by Reincarnated Saintess Lisa
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Teased by Megusaki Thief Queen Luna, who rules the black market with an iron fist.
A true Hero Party.
All that's missing is a mage (but the devs are saving that party member for future DLC).
He’s almost scaled to Hajime-san level… but as we all know…
He’s just the final boss on Hajime-san’s Road to Ascension.
Grumbling:
“5N... 6E... 2N... 8W... 9N... 7E... 12—Walletbreaker!! What was it again?!”
Walletbreaker: “5N... 6E... 2N... 8W... 9N... 7E... 12N...”
Hajime grew to love Walletbreaker’s impeccable memory.
Just as they reach the end—
Walletbreaker: “ZZZzzzzzz…”
Hajime: “Shit… I fell into a hole again...”
Walletbreaker’s snot bubble pops.
Walletbreaker: “HUHHHH? Oh right. 7S, 3N—”
Hajime: “Shut up now, we’re out from the maze.”
Walletbreaker: “Cool. Just go north and follow the river.”
It starts to sleeps again.
The end is almost nigh.
Let the final battle decide the fate of Daemon Bazonka Conquest… and Lucile-chan’s future bankruptcy filing.
Menacing foreshadowing.
“ACHOOOOO!!!”
(Shivering)
“Who the hell has cursed me?!?”