Aki

  As we were walking towards the exit from the dungeon, I didn't show it but I was intensely relieved to see sunlight again. It wasn't just my worry for Dan-Hem… Our visit to Goblintown brought up a lot of bad memories. Things that I have long repressed but which resurfaced in my nightmares from time to time. The feeling of helplessness… the fear… the screams of people dragged away to be butchered alive…

  I have a debt towards Lilyth that I will never be able to repay.

  In a weird way, I was really happy that it was the Red Masks that butchered the goblins.

  Those things deserved to die a thousand painful deaths… and… I would have probably done things to them I wouldn't be proud of.

  The mere knowledge I was capable of doing that felt sickening.

  I think that the Aki that left Dan-Hem is gone. The old me would have never considered…

  I remembered how horrible I felt about burning that one Sanguine monster to death. Now… I viewed that as a valid thing to do… because… because… I wanted someone to suffer.

  By the gods… what happened to me?

  ‘You were forced to grow up in a way no one should be, my child,’ I heard Irmen’s voice. ‘A constant fight for survival has a nasty way of bringing up people’s worst sides.’

  So what… am I destined to be… a monster?

  ‘No,’ Irmen laughed. ‘You can choose to be one. Yes. That old Aki is dead, but she started dying in that cage in Goblintown. You can still recover as much from her as possible.’

  I felt despair at that.

  I… I don't know how. The hate for the goblins… for the Red Masks… it is so strong.

  ‘I can’t tell you not to hate because it is a natural thing to feel. What you can control is how you channel it. Do you use it to hurt your enemies or protect your friends?’

  I want to protect my friends. I want to protect Lilyth.

  ‘Then you have your answer, Aki.’

  I guess I do. Will you teach me more about [Water Arcana]? I don't think… embracing my blood… will help me on this path.

  Irmen broke out laughing and with a great deal of warmth in her voice said:

  ‘Of course, I will! I was waiting for you to ask. We need to start working on those leadership skills of yours too. I’ll check in with Taros whether vae wants to chip in too. No promises there, but last I checked, vae and Deirdee were in Tyr-Mel, so they might link up with you in Dan-Hem if you guys are still there.’

  Won’t Taros mind a change in his plans?

  ‘My dear, vae is a travelling minstrel, so your group can probably offer vaem a LOT.’

  Then I’ll happily meet hi… vaem.

  ‘Splendid!’

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  Lilyth

  ‘Never thought we would see the sky ever again,’ Ren remarked after we emerged.

  ‘It’s been a long two days,’ I sighed.

  Suddenly, there was a lightning crack and Nyx appeared in front of us, holding Chirpy by the scruff. Veenaya was at her hill. Our lumizu let out a happy arf and ran towards Aki who picked her up and hugged. The tails of them both were wagging happily.

  Meanwhile, Nyx put Chirpy on the ground. It almost seemed like she wanted to drop him, but thought better of it. The little douchebag furball immediately bolted towards Ren, climbed her body and started nuzzling against her face.

  Someone felt lonely.

  Rennie took him into his arms and hugged him tightly her eyes gleaming with tears.

  Not just Chirpy it seems.

  I turned my attention to Nyx who smiled and beckoned at me with her finger.

  ‘Gonna borrow Lilyth for a moment,’ she said, but my companions, so distracted by our furry companions barely paid any attention to her.

  ‘You okay?’ Nyx asked after we were out of earshot.

  I opened my mouth to confirm but stopped myself and shook my head.

  ‘I ate someone,’ I muttered with a breaking voice.

  She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me towards herself.

  ‘There is nothing I could do or say to assuage your guilt over this,’ she murmured as I cried my eyes out into her chest. ‘In time, hopefully, you will forgive yourself.’

  Her presence felt really comforting. Nyx’s embrace was filled with the caring of a mother, the support of a friend and the tenderness of a lover.

  ‘I will be there for you no matter what,’ she whispered. ‘Call me whenever you need. And… and… once you can no longer take it… let me know. I have a place ready for you in my realm. You… will not suffer there.’

  ‘Would… would the others be able to join me there?’

  ‘No,’ Nyx said with regret in her voice. ‘They would die of elemental contamination. You… your body can adapt to it… theirs… can’t.’

  ‘Would I be able to leave?’

  ‘Of course. You will be able to come and go as you please.’

  ‘Then… I will keep that in mind…’ I took a deep breath.

  ‘Can I ask something of you?

  Nyx squeezed me to her chest.

  ‘Anything and always, my dear. If it is in my power I will help you. You deserve that and more.’

  ‘H-help me get stronger. I want to be able to protect my loved ones without… without having to be a monster.’

  Nyx’s embrace got even tighter.

  ‘Of course,’ she said quietly. ‘I couldn't think of a better apprentice. In fact…’

  Nyxie kissed me on the forehead and I felt power flow into me. A message appeared in front of my eyes.

  New Spell Acquired: [Jolt]

  Type: Elemental - Lightning - Offensive

  Level: Novice

  Effects: Allows the user to shock touched objects with electricity.

  Casting Time: Instant

  ‘Thank you,’ I whimpered.

  ‘I also have something from Akh’ret for you,’ Nyxie said after I fully calmed down.

  We were sitting on a cloud she summoned, the goddess's arm around my back. She reached into her suit and handed me a runestone.

  Item: Rune of [Lightning Lance]

  Class: Magical - Air Arcana

  Rarity: Extremely Rare

  Durability: 10/10

  Description: Allows the user to learn the [Lightning Lance] Spell. Casting the spell without sufficient knowledge of [Air Arcana] may lower its effectiveness and/or cause it to fail

  Spell Effect: Creates a lightning spear that can be used as a projectile or a single-strike melee weapon.

  Cost to learn: 2 Perk Points

  ‘Why would he give me an Air spell?’ I asked confused. ‘And why would Akh’ret reward me to begin with?

  ‘Oh… right,’ the goddess giggled in embarrassment. ‘It’s a reward for killing Helrika. He actually wanted to give you a Plant spell but I pointed out to him that given the circumstances of you acquiring the ability to cast those… it may not be the best of ideas.’

  ‘Yeah… I am not sure about my new powers. On one hand, I can see their utility, but on the other…’

  ‘They would require you to acknowledge you can… grow stronger through means that sicken you?’ Nyx suggested.

  ‘Couldn’t have said it better myself.’

  ‘Allow me to do you one better - your reaction to this… issue proves one thing - that while your body may be that of a monster, deep down, you are still a human being. It is up to you to decide how much of your new capabilities you want to utilise and whether you will control them or they will control you.’

  I wanted to protest, but I couldn't deny the rationality of Nyx’s words. In fact…

  ‘Thank you,’ I hugged her. ‘You have no idea how much of a relief hearing that is.’

  ‘Anytime, dearie,’ Nyx softly cooed while hugging me back. ‘Anytime.'