“My name’s Delilah,” said the frowning, plus-size vampire. “And sorry-- not sorry, but I’m kinda with someone right now.”

  “Sh-sh-she’s with me, d-dude,” said the guy she was with.

  Shay didn’t want to think badly of Clarence for his stutter, but the particular voice he used to defend himself was extra whiny and annoying.

  “Mm. Don’t care,” Monty said. “Listen, Delilah: you are just my type.”

  Oh.

  Suddenly, one particular thing about that guy made a lot of sense.

  “Yeah, whatever,” Delilah said, flipping a lock of her dark hair. “Back off, Majestic. Clarence and I have unresolved business with this bitch.”

  Thanks to Shay’s gong fu senses, she saw Delilah’s lightning-fast attack coming at her. Oof, something was wrong with her hand; it’d twisted into a gnarled black claw with bumps all over it. So to avoid grossness and potential bodily harm, Shay ducked down, quick.

  And Delilah followed up with a knee.

  Shay clenched her stomach muscles hard as she took the hit. Ow. Owwww. Her whole front-side hurt.

  “Fucking really?” Monty scoffed. “Pay attention.”

  It sounded like he was going to help, but he shoved HER instead of the offending, weird-handed Delilah who was technically NOT ON HIS SIDE.

  “Monty,” Shay cried-- “what the FUCK?!”

  “What?” he said, “I don’t hit girls.”

  “You almost hit NURI earlier!”

  “aHh~ that-- that bitch doesn’t count.”

  Shay half-groaned, half-growled, “I really don’t understand what’s going on in your head.”

  “Delilah,” Monty said, winking at the vampiress without shame.

  “Yeah, um... I’m flattered?” Delilah said, “But I-- I really don’t go for guys who are just three inches.”

  “I could change your mind,” Monty said, his voice low and creepy. “Y’know how it is. We can spread the word. And spread some other things while we’re at it.”

  Shay held her hands out. “Can we not talk about wieners and... spreading right now? Listen, Clarence, Delilah-- I’m a friend of Miss Park. So, can you just... let us go?”

  “W-we might work with Nuri,” Clarence said, “but-- but she’s not the b-b-boss of us. aLSO-- I’m right. ffffffucking here, Monty! The ffffuck?!”

  “So now you wanna leave?” Delilah smirked. “Then you can get outta here in a body bag. That’ll make up for putting us in the back of a fucking patrol car.”

  “Seriously?!” Shay shouted, “One of those things is nowhere near as bad as the other!!”

  Hostile intent. Telegraphed movement.

  Shay was more than ready for Delilah’s attacks. She dodged another swipe and elbow-parried the follow-up.

  Oof. Fast. Faster than most of her sect members.

  Shay tried to hop back. Not enough room in the stairwell.

  She grazed a claw swipe with an awesome, back-leaning dodge. Nice! Oh. Oh no. The mid-section of her super-expensive dress got tOrn to sHreds.

  “GahHHHHhh!!!!” Shay, powered by a poor-person’s sense of grief and loss, kicked Delilah in the crotch. She kept up the attack with a flurry of punches to the neck and boob area-- and she may have been crying throughout.

  “Ow! Ow ow ow!!” Delilah staggered back, holding her chest, “Shit. How are you so strong?”

  Shay glanced away. That might have been a compliment, but it wasn’t great to hear. She’d been doing well in her gong fu training but she was still fighting a girl who was bigger than her, taller than her, and also a literal vampire.

  Ugh. And fighting got her her dress. fucking. ruined. But at least it was hers and not something she borrowed.

  “You think she’s strong?” Monty said.

  “Can you not right now, Monty?” Shay shouted aside. “You can tell me how shit I am at everything later-- but not now.”

  “Fuck, fine. Whatever.”

  Vampire fight round two! Delilah went for a big roundhouse kick! Fast but sloppy. Shay thanked whatever stupid line of thought that led to that.

  Shay dodged it and kicked at the side of Delilah’s ankle, followed with a chop to the throat, and ending with a shoulder-shove.

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  The bigger girl tumbled back, smacking the back of her head on the metal handrail.

  “Hhhooh shit!” Clarence laughed, “That little Chinese b-b-BITCH just BROKE your fffucking leg!!! Hah! Hahahaha!!!”

  “Fuck off, Clarence,” Delilah said. “It was a lucky hit.”

  She sat up, dragging her broken ankle in. She grit her teeth and rubbed at it. Her broken bones... were they mending in real-time?

  Freaky. And another sign that they really needed to leave.

  “Hey, Clarence,” Monty said. “Can you recover from fucked up injuries like that too?”

  Clarence tilted his head. “Yyyyeah. I c-c-c-can. Th-this hole in my h-head? Multiple. bullet. Fffffragments.”

  “Huh. Cool. I guess.”

  Monty swiftly hooked his forearm around Clarence’s head. Then, he hopped up and DROVE his knee into his neck!!

  Shay winced, her shoulders shivering. It was dis-GUSTING the way Clarence’s neck snapped and hung to the side!

  But since the problems had temporarily been solved, she grabbed Monty’s sleeve and started dragging him out of the door.

  “Wait-- Shay, wait-- hold on!!” he begged. He turned back, yelling, “Delilah! Call me!!! I’ll treat you right!”

  “Not THAT easy!!” Delilah screamed. She kicked off with her good leg, lunging at them both.

  Monty reacted-- which was totally unexpected. Delilah’s teeth found his sleeve. And even though a vampire should’ve had at least the bite force of a regular person, one of her fangs literally chipped.

  “Ahh! Fuck!”

  Chance! Shay slammed the metallic door, smacking it full-force against the side of Delilah’s head. That knocked her out.

  “Ow, my toof~”

  --or not.

  They had to go. Shay dug her heels in and pushed Monty through the open door with all her strength.

  “Think she’ll call?” Monty shouted as they sprinted through the underground parking garage.

  “No!” Shay shouted back-- “Maybe!? I don’t think she was totally against the idea!!”

  Monty grinned. “I know, right!”

  He started speeding up. It wasn’t a competition, though!

  But-- as if it was, someone was running faster than both of them-- and they sped right past!

  Tall.

  Tall-- in a suit, and a with sackcloth covering his head. Nuri’s personal bodyguard, Daegeum, stopped in front of them, his white-gloved palm held out.

  Shay skidded to a stop. That person was terrifying!

  Monty did not. He slid on the concrete, smoothly transitioning into a back kick aimed at Daegeum’s chest.

  As terrifying as Daegeum was, he wasn’t immune to physics. He took the big kick and flew back.

  But... he flipped around with his palm on the floor and he landed in a crouch.

  “You don’t look so TOUGH!!” Monty yelled, lunging forward with the most predictable Superman punch in martial arts history.

  Oh, no~

  Shay flinched, turning away almost entirely. That was the worst thing you could do against an expecting and experienced martial artist!

  “Ow, my FUCKING ARRRRMM!!!”

  After a long, blood-curdling scream, Monty landed on his back in front of Shay. The way his right arm was twisted at the elbow made her stomach chuRn.

  Daegeum was examining the back of his white-gloved hand. There was blood on it-- probably from Monty’s bloody nose.

  “Miss Song,” he said, looking up, “my mistress invites you to stay for some time longer.”

  “Err... that’s--” Shay took in a deep breath. She didn’t have any good excuses. And she didn’t think lying about having to pee would be very convincing.

  Did Nuri find out she was connected to ?The Kingdom?? If so, then going back to her was essentially a death sentence!

  Daegeum tilted his head. “Perhaps she can serve as an intermediary between you and the two in the stairwell.”

  Oh.

  Or maybe Nuri didn’t know just yet. She did have a lot to drink.

  But she wasn’t stupid. She’d find out eventually. Shay needed to tell Tyvan what was going on while getting as far away from Nuri as possible.

  That was the mission! And if she failed, everything she cared about could get swallowed up by an army of vampires!

  Shay put her hand in her bag. Her anti-vampire measure... would it work on Daegeum? Was that why he wore a bag on his head? To guard against his vampiric weakness? (He was a vampire, right?)

  Monty got up with a ROAR that echoed throughout the car lot. “You’re not taking her, you ugly, face-hiding FUCK!!”

  His right arm hung loosely at his side. Tears were running down his face, blood from his nose. He looked miserable, as he always did. But for once-- juuuuust once... he was a little cool.

  “This flat-chested, annoying-voiced, stick-in-her-ass MIDGET is under MY protection!!”

  “We’re gonna die,” Shay said. “We’re both gonna die. Right here. In this spot.” She gestured around her-- “in this approximate area~”

  Daegeum hunched over, his hand on his chin. “And how far does your protection reach, Mister Jiang?”

  Monty sniffed up his tears and put on a brave face. “You ever heard of ?The Kingdom?, motherfucker?”

  The absurdly tall, creepy bodyguard... he shook. His shoulders shrugged up and the tremble went down his whole body.

  “That... needs to be brought to my Mistress’ attention.”

  “Oh,” Shay closed her eyes. “We are so fucked.”

  --”SHAY!!! NOW!!!”

  Huh?

  Disembodied but familiar female voice echoing through the parking garage!?

  Whatever! That was as good a sign as any for Shay to use her final desperate defense measure!