‘I’m leaving tomorrow.’ As I expected, you utter a whole lot of objections to my statement. Though they are nice to hear, they also sound a bit shallow. You do not want me to stay, not really. I get it, you build this place, Hiraeth, a place you wish that had been, a place for you, a fresh start. I do not belong here anyway. I have to keep up my search to find my own home. What’s another few years to me? I have all the time in the world.

  The day I leave, you give me the biggest hug. I almost push you away, but I don’t. If I did not know any better, I would have thought this would be the last time we saw each other. But fate is a funny thing and the world we live in is always smaller than we think. Who knows when we will meet again. As I wave you goodbye, I feel a sadness, but also a relief wash over me.

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  I’ve spent most of my endless life protecting earth. Days and days filled fearing whether we would live to see another day, so many hours spent doubting whether I wished to see any more days. When it finally disappeared in a giant cloud of smoke it created an emptiness in me. And that emptiness remained with me as we wandered through the great emptiness that is space. But at the dawn of that morning, as Hiraeth shrinks in the distance, becomes so small again that I could hold it in the palm of my hand, that emptiness becomes a little less empty.

  The title of this piece is Hiraeth, a word from the wonderful Welsh language. A few other names of places, people and things are taken from the Welsh dictionary as well. For those who are not fluent in Welsh, here is a small Welsh dictionary:

  Hiraeth (n): A homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, or that never was

  Arwain (v): To lead, or guide

  Nyth (n): Nest

  Cynefin (n): Habitat; a place where a person or an animal feels it ought to live that feels right and welcoming

  Amddifad (n): Orphan

  Rhian (name): A Welsh name, which is a variation of 'rhiain', the Welsh word for maiden

  Calennig (n): Refers to a New Year celebration or gift. Literally translates to "the first day of the month", deriving from the Latin word kalends. The English word "Calendar" also has its root in this word

  Enaid (n): Soul, life or spirit, the essence of an individual

  Briallen (n): Primrose, plant of the genus Primula

  Wilber (n): Wheelbarrow

  Deml (n): Temple

  Life can only be understood backwards;

  But it must be lived forwards.

  -S?ren Kierkegaard