“So, you doing this?” Gavin asked as they portaled in to Sam's estate.

  “I'm still thinking.”

  “Your parents are going to find out about the last one sooner or later.” Gavin said, guessing at her apprehension.

  “I know.” she said, biting her lip.

  “I'll support you when the time comes.”

  “Thanks.” She said in a small voice before steeling herself “I'll do it. Stand aside, I'm absorbing that crystal.”

  Gavin watched as Sam knelt, placing the pulsing green crystal in front of her. It's light wrapping around her like vines lashing her to the ground. The glow around her surged then faded as it was drawn through the tendrils into her body. Slowly the light under her skin faded.

  “Gavin.”

  “Yeah.”

  “You're going to be very jealous.”

  “What did you get?” Gavin asked, his voice raising an octave.

  “You know that tree thing the dryad was melded into?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I think I can do that now.”

  “No. Fuckin. Way.” Gavin said, his unwavering grin flashing in the dying light “I'm gonna use my one too, then we can test yours out.

  “Deal.”

  Gavin opened his inventory and selected the bubble shield power, pausing for the last moment to consider if it was a wise choice or if he was just making it because he didn't want to be left out. He contemplated his own path, he was walking ever more down the support caster road, taking a bubble shield instead the arcane shield would be more skill intensive but would allow him to protect others as well as himself. Both were linked to his intellect attribute that was gaining an artificial boost so either would be good choices. He was situating himself as the core of a team, not as a solo hero.

  He'd always been drawn to playing bards in dungeons and dragons, the fuel that kept the party running. Not especially good at devastating enemies, but undoubtedly making combat trivial for everyone else.

  “Damn. I’m Robin.” Gavin said with sudden realisation.

  “Who?”

  “Nevermind. It's your turn to be jealous sam.” Gavin smiled.

  “Oh?”

  “I can make bubbles”

  [Bubble Shield]

  [Description: Create a short lived shield to protect you or a nearby ally.]

  [Effect: Create a shield of force around a target that negates all damage until damage threshold is reached up to a distance proportional to your [WIllpower] attribute. Threshold determined by your [Intellect] attribute]

  “Oh, that's nice” Sam said. “It's no awakened tree body, but still, blowing bubbles can be useful too I guess.”

  “Rub it in why don't you.” Gavin laughed.

  “I intend to, at length” Sam said, matching his energy and mimicking Gavin’s usual mocking tone “now come on, I've got a power to test, and some parents to really annoy.”

  Sam stood in the centre of the clearing, emerald light glowed from underneath her skin as her eyes turned a fiery copper. Braided vines shot from through gaps in her armour to twist into powerful knotted limbs. She rose up as the tree forming beneath her took shape.

  It was similar but different to the one the dryad had been embedded in, it was smaller for one thing, standing at just over two metres tall including Sam, her arms were incorporated into the main body of the tree instead of being wholly separate. Her head and torso were exposed, encased in their steel armour while her legs melded down into its abdomen. Gavin guessed her feet would have been about where its hips would be, assuming it even had hips. The braided vines scrawled into the musculature weren't as gnarled as the dryads, forming an intricate design through the powerful limbs. In one hand Sam held her sword, looking closer to a shortsword than the greatsword it was in her normal form.

  “Thats cool as shit. You look like a paragon warsuit made out of trees. I wonder if I can make you a multi-melta or something.”

  “It feels really good.” she said, ignoring the rest of his ramblings as she ran her new body through a quick sequence of exercises, her blade twirling easily in the knotted wooden hand. “I'm gonna need to do some training with this, it's eating into my mana faster than any of my other powers combined.”

  “Oh man, it must suck to have such a tiny mana pool.” Gavin said, inspecting his fingernails casually.

  “Ha, I knew you'd be jealous.”

  “Well, I'm definitely keeping all the money we got from those contracts now.”

  “Go ahead, all the platinum in the world couldn't pay for you to be as awesome as me.”

  “Fair.” Gavin shrugged “I'm glad for you Sam.”

  “Thanks Gav, come on, let's go find my parents.”

  They strolled through the grounds, turning heads as they walked up to the main hall. Gavin threw open the large double doors letting Sam walk through, barely needing to duck.

  Lady Starbourne had her steely cold stare laser focused on her daughter. That stare shifted to Gavin as he touched Sam's wooden hand to reassure her. Gavin felt his insides turn to mush. He'd drawn the ire of a very dangerous predator who now wanted his blood. Griffin wore the stern expression of an angered king, though he couldn't help noticing the crinkles around his eyes and the upturned corners of his mouth.

  Gulping despite his dry mouth he took a lonely step forward, the sound of his leather boot echoing in the dead silent room. Sam mirrored Gavin, striding out ahead with her new mighty body. She arrived at the head table before Gavin, dismissing her form and shrinking back to her normal size. They each took a seat opposite Sams still silent parents. Gavin met the eyes of the Lady of the house, Sam dragging hers up from her navel to glance at her father then her mother.

  “So, how was everyone's day? Ours was pretty normal” Gavin asked as though there wasn't an air of danger so thick he could feel it at his throat like a blade of ice. Somewhere in the hall someone choked off a stifled squeal.

  “How d-”

  “Ann” Griffin whispered “not here.”

  Anabel shot a look at her husband “We will discuss this later” she said, pushing her chair out then stalking from the room.

  “Well, up until thirty seconds ago my day was quite pleasant. You're certainly developing a flair for the dramatic, daughter.” Griffin said, glancing at Gavin.

  “I should have told you sooner.”

  “What's done is done. I'm going to go talk to your mother. Eat some food then come to the private meeting room.”

  “Understood.” Sam said, gulping down her fear.

  “And Samania, I'm proud of you, even if I think you could have chosen a more diplomatic avenue to do what you did.” Lord starbourne strode out of the dining hall following his wife.

  “Well, that could have gone worse.” Gavin said optimistically.

  “Could have gone better too.” Sam said. “Just walking in like that was never going to work out well.”

  “Cheer up, now all we've got to do is bring your mum around.”

  “I have never in my life seen or heard of anyone who has seen her bend her will on any issue.” Sam said.

  “There's always a first time. She's your mum, if she can't be happy for you that's completely her problem not yours.”

  “And if it tears my family apart?”

  “Then your mother chose her pride over her family.”

  “Like I did.” Sam said hollowly.

  “You chose your own self determination over your overbearing mother's plan for her perfect little daughter.”

  “You make her sound like a monster.”

  “In my world some parents live their lives through their children. Forcing them to be the person they wished they were. It's cruel and abusive. The kids always turn out fucked in the head from decades of pressure. Can you say you were headed down a path that led you to a happy fulfilled life? Becoming the perfect soldier. Having a team of hand picked mercenaries all focused around making you the centrepiece, all there to build up your reputation while they get paid to keep you alive.”

  “It's what I was born to be, what I was made for.” Sam said.

  “Ahh, what does that mean exactly?” Gavin said, his tirade ending abruptly.

  “When adventurers get too high in rank our bodies become like magical constructs, certain biological functions stop working.”

  “I'm not seeing how this is relevant?”

  “My parents went to a temple of Florrin to create me, combining the best parts of each of them.”

  “Woah woah woah, back the truck up. You're telling me your parents conspired with the god of Life to create the ultimate soldier?”

  “Yes.”

  “Je-sus” Gavin breathed “I- fuck Sam, that's so fucked up. Like I can't-” Gavin rambled, his thoughts a blurred mess.

  “It's okay.” Sam said. “I am who I am.”

  “You need to be the you you want to be. Not what your parents made you to be. Great heroes aren't made by committee, they're forged in the fire with their trusted companions. Putting all that pressure on you from birth is beyond unfair.”

  “I know that look Gav, and you will not say anything about it. I mean it, it's a fight you won't win.”

  “Fuckin oath I'd win that fight.”

  “I mean it. Just drop it.”

  “I'll keep my mouth shut. But only if they don't force the issue. I wont stand by and let them fuck with your head Sam.” Gavin said, frustrated.

  They ate in uncomfortable silence, the food like lead in their stomachs. When they were done Sam pushed her plate away and stood.

  “I'm going to see my parents.”

  “You okay? I can come with.”

  “Thank you for your support earlier but now this is something I want to face alone.”

  “I'll be with you in spirit, come find me later, I think I'll go into town for a bit, I need to spend some of this money that's been burning a hole in my pocket.” Gavin said without enthusiasm.

  Sam nodded and left to find her parents. Gavin cleaned his plate then opened a portal into town.

  He made a beeline for the Wardens guild, even though dusk had settled hours earlier the place was still alive with activity. The enrolments office was open, and Gavin strode in full of swagger.

  “I'd like to apply to take the test to become a member.” he told the bored looking office worker.

  “Fill out this form” she said, handing him a sheet of paper and pencil.

  He took the form and retreated to a cramped bench to fill it in.

  Given name(s): Gavin, Frederich

  Family name: Pēne

  House affiliation: none

  Guild sponsor: Samania Starbourne

  Nationality: New Zealander

  Unlocked powers: Deconstruct, Force of Will, Body of Iron, Empower Intellect, Spoils of war, gate of infinity, otherworldly enchanter, expert smith, bubble shield, fabricate.

  Notable achievements: Make a pretty good steak and cheese pie, also made a new friend without both of us being drunk.

  Gavin handed in his form to the lady who glanced it over, frowning. “No house affiliation?”

  “I've been living at the Starbourne residence recently, though I think lady Starbourne herself would be a little upset if I tried to claim her family as my house at the current moment, not that I'd be especially keen otherwise. I kinda just annoyed her, but not nearly as much as she just annoyed me.”

  The office workers eyebrow raised a hair “Well good luck to you- Gavin” she said, glancing over his form one more time. “Test is four days from now, assemble at first light over there by that white post.”

  She raised a gnarled finger and pointed it out the blackened door. Gavin followed the gesture to see a lone marker out off to the side of the courtyard.

  “Gotcha, cheers” Gavin said, walking out of the building.

  On his way to the market he overheard some adventurers discussing their latest contract, evidently they were tier two adventurers and had killed a bunch of fairly powerful monsters. One of them had looted some very useful items and they were on their way to sell them at the hall

  “Hey, mate” Gavin called “mind if I have a look at whatcha got? I'll pay full price if there's anything I like”

  The group rounded on Gavin irritation on their faces

  “Got the coin to pay or are you just wasting our time?” One of the guys said failing to keep the scorn from his voice.

  Gavin flashed a couple of his higher value solars before disappearing them back into his inventory. “I've showed you mine, now you show me yours?”

  “He can have a look as long as he promises not to make it sound so dirty” the leader of the group said.

  “Deal, whatcha got mate?”

  “We've got an power of mass teleport”

  Gavin whistled appreciatively

  “We've also got a dagger of divine retribution, an animated shield, and a ring of mana recovery.”

  “How much for the lot? Minus the crystal.”

  “More than you've got.”

  “Try me.”

  “Hey Simon, you got the market rate for this stuff?”

  “Yes. The ahh, time crystal is worth three thousand seven hundred solars, The shield is worth somewhere between two thousand solars and two thousand two hundred solars, the ring is worth eleven hundred solars, the dagger is worth six thousand three hundred solars, give or take.”

  Gavin did some maths in his head

  “I'll take the shield and the ring for three thousand five hundred if you'll let me inspect the dagger, I just want to copy the enchantment.”

  “Simon?” The leader asked, deferring the choice to him.

  “It’s more than it'd all cost to buy, we'll be making more profit off it too since we won't be selling to the guild at a discount.”

  “Are you willing to make sure he doesn't run away with the dagger?”

  “What if I gave you money for the dagger now, take it, find you in an hour and swap it for the remaining gear and the difference?”

  “Acceptable, it will be easier to sell the dagger than the other items and isn't out of my way. I will be in the guild market purchasing supplies for one hour and eight minutes, give or take” Simon said checking a silver pocket watch. “If you aren't at the entrance before I leave, you can keep the dagger and we're keeping the rest.”

  “Deal” Gavin said hastily, proffering a leather pouch filled with jangling coins.

  Simon took the money, stashing it in his own extradimensional space

  “Its all there” he said nodding to the leader and pulling a silver and gold hilted dagger in an equally ornate silver and gold sheath from his inventory “you have one hour and seven minutes.”

  Gavin snatched the dagger, falling back through the portal he opened behind himself.

  A little over an hour later Gavin’s portal opened up in the same place it'd been previously. He stepped through at a run headed towards the marketplace, his hair significantly more frazzled than it'd been earlier. He had a manic look about him, his smile showing too many teeth as sprinted. He nearly ran headlong into Simon as he leapt up the stairs three at a time.

  “Right on time.”

  “Yeah. Cut it pretty close. Here's the dagger.” He said, materialising it from his inventory.

  “And here's your other gear. Thank you for your business.”

  “If you're keen I'd be happy to keep in touch if you want to make some extra money before you sell your gear to the guild.”

  “I'm open to the idea.”

  “Good, well, I'm staying up at the Starbourne estate, for now anyway, if you come across any interesting or unusual enchanted items I'll pay to look them over for a bit, you can keep them afterwards to sell.”

  “Acceptable.”

  “Have a good one then mate, ask for Gavin, that's me, or James, he's one of the employees.” Gavin beamed.

  “See you around, Gavin.” Simon said, pleasantly happy with the small windfall that had fallen into his lap.

  Gavin trundled off, a spring in his step, to spend the last of his remaining coins while his portal came off cooldown. He had another soul power he wanted before he felt he was truly ready to fight on his own merits, and one that would solidify the core of his fighting style.

  Half an hour later he portaled back to the Starbourne estate, his money situation looking extremely bleak. He ran for his room, colliding with Sam who was just exiting as he slammed his door open.

  “Ow.” Sam said, holding her nose.

  “Sorry.” Gavin said, pushing past to go work at his desk.

  “Whats got your marhound in a frenzy?”

  “Work to do.” Gavin said, practically bouncing with excitement.

  Are you ok Gavin?”

  “Yeah, excited. Need to figure out if I can make it work” he said, pulling books out of his inventory.

  “I'll come back later” said Sam, pulling the door closed.

  “No, wait” Gavin said, collecting himself. “How did it go?”

  He forced himself to calm, trying with an effort to tamp down his bubbling fervor to be empathetic for his friend. He placed the books back in his inventory and turned to look her in the eyes, giving her his full attention.

  “Okay, I think. Mother isn't happy, father is acting as mediator, trying to smooth things over. We all said stuff I think we'll end up regretting.”

  “Family can be messy.” Gavin said distastefully.

  “Sure can.” said Sam, flumping down on Gavin’s bed.

  “Did my name come up at all?”

  “A lot actually. I don't think mum will let you join the guild now.”

  “I thought that might be a possibility.”

  Sam sat up, eyeing him suspiciously.

  “Gavin. What did you do?” She said.

  “What? Me? Not much.”

  “You've been alone for two hours, you've had more than enough time to get into trouble.”

  “Well, I've spent about ninety nine percent of the money I had.”

  “To buy what?”

  “Crafting materials mostly, and I got a new power.” Gavin said, winking out of existence and appearing across the room in the same instant.

  [Ether warp]

  (Level 1): Instantly teleport yourself a short distance to a location you can see on a 6 second cooldown, maximum distance proportional to your [Intellect] attribute, mana cost proportional to your [Spirit] attribute.

  “Ether warp? You didn’t go with translocate or step through time?”

  “It synergises with my powers a little better and getting additional charges as it ranks up and the reduced mana cost feels a little bit more useful than being able to use it on an enemy or being able to make an unblockable attack every ten seconds.”

  “You’re planning on making it your centrepiece ability when you rank up? Be everywhere on the battlefield rather than use it in key moments like my blur power?”

  “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’ll have the mana to make it work, especially when I start enchanting top tier gear for us.”

  “That I’d like to see.”

  “Give it time.” Gavin said with a wink. “Also I booked in my guild test is in four days.”

  “You did what?” Sam said standing up “oh, mother is gonna be piiissed.”

  “I was wondering, on a scale from one to ten, how bureaucratic is the wardens guild?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well, once the forms been signed, stamped, and sent away to do whatever it is the bureaucrats do with the application forms, how much power would, say, your mum have about whether or not I can take the test or have my test torpedoed?”

  “She would be able to stop you, but it'd be a really embarrassing political mess. If you pass you'd get to be a warden, but you'd almost certainly not get a promotion without her blessing, and you'd be on thin ice. Even if you move cities it will be an issue for you.”

  “I can live with that.”

  “So, what did you buy?”

  “Some magic stuff, also rented a dagger for an hour to figure out the enchantment on it.”

  “And did you?”

  “Give me a couple days and I'll let you know. Also, I'm skipping training for the next three days.”

  “You're not skipping training” Sam said definitively.

  “If you want me ready for my test then I will be.” Gavin said matter of factly.

  ***

  Gavin worked tirelessly for the next few days, planning, tinkering, working and reworking. Finally his hours of exhaustive testing began to bare fruit, he’d come a long way in a short time and had come up with a small handful of items he was genuinely happy with, given the circumstances.

  On the third evening he bathed and emerged from his hovel to have dinner in the main hall for the first time since he entered his feverish working spree. The starbourne family were all in attendance. He felt Lady Starbourne’s hackles rise especially when she spotted him. Before he sat, Gavin faced her.

  “I know I've put no small amount of effort into taking actions that incidentally interfered with your family, I know I’ve been a disruption here that you probably didn't want.” He said diplomatically.

  Anabel nodded curtly but remained silent, her jaw muscles working almost imperceptibly.

  “I hope that we can put our differences aside when I demonstrate my value as both a warden and as a team member to your daughter.”

  “And how do you plan on doing that exactly?” Anabel shot.

  “You all know I got my hands on an enchanting power.” Gavin said, producing a sword from his inventory, letting it sit naked on the dining table in front of them “Go on, have a look. This is what I can do after a month. Give me a couple years and see where I end up.”

  Anabel reached across the table, her fingers touching the wire bound wooden hilt of the sword, its steel bright pommel a smooth seven pointed star. The blade was of slate grey steel, where the edge was lined with bright white metal, sharpened and polished to a mirror finish. A single fuller engraved with the word 'S A M A N I A' ran down its length on one side and Temet Nosce on the other.

  Lady starbourne did something Gavin had never seen before. One corner of her lip ticked up in a whisper of a smile before snapping back to a rigid control.

  Lord Griffin took up the sword in one hand, his eyes meeting Gavin's.

  “Looks like this is for you, daughter” he said, dropping the formality.

  Finally sam took up her sword, her mouth dropping open as she looked it over.

  [Item: Samania's Great Sword]

  [type: Weapon, greatsword]

  [rank: level 1, epic]

  [Description: A sword forged with the fires of friendship with the hope this blade will remind its owner of the importnance of seizing their own destiny, and also looking totally fucking cool while she fights evil.]

  [Effect: Activate to deal additional radiant damage. Damage increase proportional to enemy maximum health]

  [Effect: Activate to grow in size for a low mana cost proportional to the change in size]

  [Effect: Can be soulbound]

  “Gavin, thank you” Samania said, her voice croaky as she wrapped Gavin in a tight hug.

  “No worries mate” Gavin said, hugging her back across the shoulders awkwardly.

  “How did you make a soulbound item at your rank?” Anabell asked.

  “Something I'm interested to know as well.” Lord Griffin said.

  “Well, funny story, I might have only got my powers in the last week or so and most of them are level one still, but my smithing and enchanting skills aren't.”

  “You had your smithing skill for only a few weeks now and your enchanting skill even less than that, are you telling me you ranked them up in that time?”

  “Well, yeah, pretty much” said Gavin inspecting his fingernails.

  “How?”

  “Turns out smithing and enchanting can be exploited slightly.”

  “How so?”

  “Back in my world there's a game where you can control an avatar and go around killing monsters in sorta the same way wardens do. One ability you can level is smithing, you can go into a town, buy a bunch of iron, then make a thousand daggers, smelt those daggers down to make a bunch of iron ingots, then forge those ingots back into daggers. Eventually you get to a point where you've reached the absolute maximum smithing level the game will allow, and now you're able to craft the best gear at the very beginning of the game. Then you do the same for enchanting, which is much more tedious because it requires physical components that are hard to get. Unlike that game, a lot of basic enchantments here only need mana.”

  “And that works in this world with your powers?”

  “To a degree. I do have these really annoying bottlenecks with needing to be a specific level to unlock additional effects, but the enchanting power I got basically let's me make whatever enchantments I want so long as I know how to do it, it only caps the max rank I can enchant to.”

  “Have you been spending your afternoons making thousands of daggers, enchanting them, deconstructing them, then remaking them.” Sam asked already knowing the answer.

  “That's more or less what I've been doing for weeks, yeah.” Gavin admitted.

  “And you used all that of that skill and all of your money to make me a sword instead of preparing for your test?” Sam asked sudden frustration and exasperation marring her face.

  “Come now, I made one or two things for myself too” Gavin said defensively “your sword was actually the prototype.”

  The next day samania escorted Gavin down to the adventurers guild where there was a small gathering of people. He was decked out in his casual clothes that he'd commissioned a tailor make for his day to day use. He wore an approximation of board shorts and t-shirt and paid a very confused cobbler make some jandals, which were apparently not a thing in this world. Most of the group were outfitted with their adventuring gear, the ones that weren’t, looked like they were there to see their wards off, the same as what Sam was doing for him.

  “Did you soulbond your new sword?” Gavin asked as they loitered around waiting for the test to begin.

  “Last night.” Sam said, holding her hand out and summoning her sword for a second before then dismissing it.

  “Suits you.”

  “It does. I meant to ask you, what does the inscription read down the blade?”

  “It's a phrase from a movie, it means 'know yourself' in this dead language people use to make themselves sound cool.”

  “I'd like to hear that story some time.”

  “I'll tell you about it when we go out next.” Gavin laughed “you'll like it, well, the first part of it anyway.”

  “First part?”

  “Yeah they wrote the first part of it to be the whole story, then a while later they decided to make some more money so they wrote three more parts. The story gets really convoluted and up it's own arse towards the end.”

  “Is that why you like the end parts then?”

  Gavin's face scrunched up like he'd bitten into an unripe lime

  “blasphemy” he grumbled.

  They watched as two people approached from within the guild. The first, a deathly pale man dressed in plain brown robes, he looked vaguely athletic, but his timid gait showed he was no fighter. The second person, an olive skinned woman in loose fitting clothes that wouldn't have looked out of place in an episode of Dragonball-z. She had a ragged scar starting just under one eye, running down to meet the corner of her lip as it passed down to end at the centre of her chin.

  “I am Valerie Westheart, you may call me Val, Valerie, or Westheart, I don't care what, so long as you aren't calling me ‘my lady’ or ‘Mistress’, or by any other title. I will be administering your test, I am a tier three guild official, and as such I am responsible for weeding out those of you who I believe will not be able to represent my guild. This is Clergyman Bines, you may address him as clergyman or clergyman Bines. He is a healer of the second circle from the temple of Florrin and is responsible for putting the blood back into you when you fail your test. He will not be assisting you in combat unless you are in danger of dying. Anyone not participating in this test may leave now. Are there any questions?”

  “What exactly are the testing criteria?” One youth near the back asked as half the gathering dispersed.

  “My own.”

  “That's not fair.” another argued.

  “Not my problem.” Val admonished “now, we need to confirm everyone is here and are who they say they are.”

  Val held out a hand and a stack of papers appeared in it.

  “Gibson Farmsten?”

  “That's me.” said Gibson, a weedy looking youth in the crowd.

  Val stepped up to him, looking him over. Apparently seeing no issue, called out the next name.

  “Sarah Conway?”

  “Here.” The dark wiry woman called.

  Val looked her over too “specialisation?”

  “Killing monsters mam- uhh, Va- Westhart.”

  “Good. Gavin Pene?”

  “Yo.”

  “Funny man are you? What are you doing enrolling into my guild?”

  “Ahh, signing up to be an adventurer, oh, ahh warden?”

  “Why?” she said, her eyes narrowing at his flippant tone.

  “I want to get strong and people need protecting, seemed like a good idea to do the thing where I can do both.”

  “You've listed Samania Starbourne as a sponsor, did she train you?”

  “Yes.”

  “You have an awful lot of utility and crafting powers for someone wanting to fight monsters.”

  “I guess so, yeah.” Gavin shrugged.

  “You don't see that as something detrimental to your career?”

  “I believe that's your job to figure out Val.”

  “I'll be keeping a very close eye on you.”

  “Not too close I hope, some of these other fine people might want to pass the test too.” Gavin said not breaking eye contact.

  Val puffed a slightly stronger breath from her nose, calling out the next name “Steven Stewardson.”

  “Is all this strictly necessary?” Steven said.

  “Yes” said Val, eyeing the broad shouldered man “Why are you here.”

  “You know who I am?”

  “I do, I have your name on this list right here.”

  “Then you know why I'm here.” he said, rolling his eyes.

  “I should rephrase.” Val said sweetly “why should I let you into my guild?”

  “Because that's your job.” Steven said snorting his derision.

  “My job, mister Stewardson, is to disqualify any of you who I don't think should join the Wardens guild. I am under no obligation to pass you because of your name.”

  “Try fail me and see what happens.”

  “You're gone. Go home Stewardson” spat Val without hesitation, using his name like an expletive instead of a title.

  “My father will hear about this.”

  “I'll see that he does. Anyone else have any issues with what just happened here, you have anything to add Mr Harold Stewardson?” Val said, rounding on another tall broad shouldered man who's stormy expression looked like he wanted to start trouble.

  “No, Westheart.” he said after a long pause.

  “Good, now, Judy Hawkthorne?”

  Val rattled of the rest of the list, querying some like she did Gavin but most warranted no more than a glance she seemed to have narrowed in on potential troublemakers and got them out of the way early.

  She then led them in a column out of town, across the bridge leading to the other side of the estuary. As they marched haphazardly through the streets Gavin struck up a conversation with the woman beside him

  “Judy, was it? I'm Gavin.” he said, extending his hand for her to shake.

  “It's nice to meet you” she mumbled half heartedly.

  “You from around here?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Your gear looks pretty solid for unenchanted stuff, want me to give it a quick glow up?”

  “No thanks.” She said, putting a wall of calm up between them.

  “Doesn't seem to fit very well, is it second hand?” Gavin asked

  “It was my mothers” She said flatly.

  “Oh.” Gavin said, backing off.

  “Hey, blacksmith, you with the funny accent” came a familiar voice from behind them.

  “What's up mate?”

  “Why don't you keep your questions to yourself.”

  “Just having a yarn mate. What's your issue, got an eye problem?” Gavin said, standing up a little straighter.

  “She's part of my team.”

  “So?”

  “So you don't talk to my team”

  Gavin's eyebrows raised slightly “You serious mate?”

  “I'm not your mate.”

  “You always this cranky in the morning?”

  “Please don’t.” Judy whispered. Gavin looked at her, nodding silently.

  “Okay mate, I'll keep my mouth shut.”

  “You'd better.” Harold said, satisfied he'd won the exchange.

  Gavin turned away, gesturing rudely at his back.

  Crossing the bridge out of Wildinesse over the estuary into the wilds beyond, they formed up into a loose clump in front of Val, a seemly endless expanse of rolling sand dunes behind her.

  “Okay, I've got a bunch of monsters to clear in this area, they aren’t on contract so you will not be getting paid by the guild for killing them unless you can convince anyone who might have a looting power to harvest them for their resources. I'm going to be sending you out in different sized groups and sometimes as a solo while the rest of us observe. If any of you impress me enough I'll be handing you over to Clergyman Bines to oversee while I take the slackers up into those hills tomorrow.” Val said as she indicated at a grey smear on the horizon vaguely in the direction of Riverford.

  They set out, Gavin's jandals clicking against his feet in stark contrast to the sounds of creaking armour and soft robes that seemed to be the dominant adventurer fashion. It wasn't long till they crested a ridge to see a half dozen armadillo creatures tussling in the dunes.

  “Gavin, Sadie, Nick.” Val whispered pointing out the members of the group. “You three up first.”

  Gavin looked out over the monsters then at their makeshift team “plan?”

  “We go in and kill them” Nick said as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

  “What are your combat styles? I'll adapt to fill whatever role our group needs.”

  “I'm a sorcery specialist, elemental spells and such.” said Nick rolling his eyes.

  “Archery.” Sadie said more agreeably.

  “Guess I'm taking the front line role then. I'll tie them up while you two blast them.”

  “They're just ardwears, they die easy.”

  “I've never fought them and they aren't in the book of common monsters and demons I have.” Gavin said looking for them in his user interface. “They look like they can burrow, can they?”

  “Yes.” said Sadie “there are probably a lot more under the sand.”

  “We don't need to worry about them, they're easy to kill.” Nick said, clearly irritated with Gavin's caution.

  “I mean, we have an unknown amount monsters to fight, seems like a good thing to figure out.”

  “Whatever.” Nick said rolling his eyes even more deliberately.

  “Okay, let's go.” Gavin said frowning at him.

  Gavin set out at a jog, slipping through time to appear instantly at the bottom of the dunes equipping his armour as he ran, his new spear materialising in his hand at the same time as he threw up a small metal star to hover in the air above himself, its seven points glinting in the morning light.

  [Item: Gavin’s spear]

  [Type: Weapon, spear]

  [Rank: level 1, epic]

  [Description: A spear made by Gavin, for Gavin. If lost, please return to Gavin]

  [Effect: Activate to deal additional radiant damage. Damage increase proportional to enemy maximum health]

  [Effect: Can be activated to grow in size for a small mana cost proportional to the change in size]

  [Effect: Soulbound]

  Gavin's spear was a mirror of samanias sword, an iron oak heartwood shaft that terminated in a head made of magical steel with a mithril edge. Steel inlay in the shaft read “G A V I N” on one face and “what man is a man who does not try to make the world a better place” down the entire length of the other in fine cursive.

  He tossed a small star from his inventory up above his head, the tiny object hovering in place on a thread of force. It followed him as he walked his way down the dunes its wickedly sharp blades glinting in the morning sun.

  [Item: Gavin’s throwing star]

  [Type: Thrown]

  [Rank: Level 1, rare]

  [Description: Really fuckin sharp.]

  [Effect: Deals additional slashing damage, can cause the [bleeding] condition]

  When he'd covered most of the ground between the ardwears an arrow streaked a metre over his head trailing a corkscrew of purple light. The arrow connected with one of the monsters which unceremoniously slumped to the sand, dead. A ball of fire hit the ground a few metres in front of him and slightly to the side, tumbling and rolling across the sand as it spilled a trail of flames behind it. Several ardwears were caught in the conflagration, letting out pained shrieks

  Then Gavin was in amongst them, twirling his spear in wide arcs to keep the rush of oncoming monsters at bay. He kept mobile, circling the mass of bodies as they surged into action, he teleported to the side and attacked their flanks t keep them off balance as arrows and elemental energy rained down on them from the hill above. He had trained under Samania for weeks now, and she was a master of creating space and avoiding being hit, he used that training now to take every opportunity to stab at the flanks of their enemy and whip his spear around to dissuade any further attacks. His spear bit home time and again, killing several of the creatures, though it seemed for each one the prospective adventurers killed, another was burrowed underneath the sand, each rising up around Gavin's feet as he manoeuvred around the battlefield.

  One or two ardwears from the back of the pack periodically broke off to run up the hill towards his companions. Gavin's Star zipped through the air to slash through their leather hide. Pulling on the star it resumed its lazy circling around his head while he worked at his constant retreat from the overwhelming force of enemies.

  Gradually the pack thinned and Gavin was able to take a more aggressive posture, thrusting his spear into them as they mobbed him, the tip of his weapon burning crackling holes of white light inside their bodies. The fight wasn't one sided, he took dozens of small wounds that nipped at his legs and tore at his boots and he spent the majority of the time trying not to get hit even if their teeth were too dull to do much more than scrape his toughened skin.

  He pressed the fight more violently, trying to finish the fight quickly, not caring about the minor hits he was taking. His shooting star becoming more animated as he had fewer enemies to concentrate on, it whipped around him, skimming through flesh and trailing lines of blood in the sand behind him.

  Lightning and fire decimated their ranks but became less effective as the enemies thinned. The arrows from above became more useful, picking off the strays as Gavin dealt with the last remaining knot of monsters.

  When they were done, Gavin walked around each of the bodies, touching them with a jandal, having changed into more comfortable clothing.

  [You have looted sixty four [Ardweir]]

  [You have looted:]

  [64 level 1 silver coins]

  [128 level 1 bronze coins]

  [256 level 1 iron coins]

  [512 level 1 copper coins]

  [3 level 1 common health potions]

  [10 Ardweir hide]

  Gavin sauntered back up to the group

  “Made a good team I think, nice work.” Gavin said amiably, holding out two identical pouches to Sadie and Nick.

  “Maybe Sadie and me made a good team but you barely killed any.”

  Gavin shrugged “kept them busy though, you think you would have been able to dump all your mana if they'd come up here to chase you around? You should just take the loot and keep your trap shut.”

  “How much did you keep for yourself?” Nick asked.

  “A third.” Gavin said exasperation creeping into his voice “you don't have to take it if you don't want it, by all rights I could just keep the lot.”

  “You think you're entitled to it all let alone a third?”

  “I know teams usually contract out loot distribution, but I'm doing this out of the goodness of my heart and that goodness only goes so far if you want to keep being a dick about it.” Gavin said offering Sadie two additional small vials.

  “What about mine?” Nick said, unable to help himself.

  “Maybe if you weren't such a cock you'd have gotten one, I got my one third share of the loot, I’m not much fussed how the rest of the team deals with their share, unless you want some leather? I bet I could make you a really cool leather face mask” Gavin said holding his index fingers and thumbs up in a rectangle that framed his face.

  “That's enough bickering, back into the group.” Val called from her vantage point.

  The day wore on, the team trekking through the dunes. Gavin's improved stamina from near constant training and small bump to his endurance attribute from ranking up two of his crafting abilities was a real boon for warding off fatigue in the beating sun. While he wasn't fighting he was wearing his casual clothes that felt breezy and light as he strolled over the radiating sand.

  The second team to fight was Stewardsons team. Gavin looked on as Judy shot arrows at a blistering pace at a heavily armoured, six metre long komodo dragon that spat acid at the group. Stweardson appeared to be a frontline fighter like Sam, fairly talented, while the remaining member of the team was throwing buffs on Stewardson while he danced around the massive lizard with a sword and shield, hacking mostly ineffectually against the thick bony skin.

  Once they were done, Stewardson approached Gavin “go on, loot the corpse.”

  “Gonna ask nicely mate?”

  “Go do your job.”

  “Okay, sounds good.” Gavin said, walking back into the group pulling a steaming pie from his inventory.

  “Well?” Stewardson stated to Gavin’s back

  “Hmm?” Gavin grunted through a mouthful of food “what's that mate?”

  “Go and loot the corpse.”

  “Nah, don't feel like it. Not super keen to have a bunch of rich pricks push me around for the next few days, did you not see how it worked out for Nick when he tried the same thing an hour ago?”

  “You have a looting power, it's your job to loot the monsters.”

  “Actually, I'm technically unemployed, so I figure just bumming around with a bunch of other unemployed people is a fairly good description of what my job is. Tell you what, if I pass the test I'll come back and loot the body for you, deal?”

  “Go do what I said.” He said more emphatically, his face turning red.

  Gavin shot Val a look who remained impassive, her hawklike eyes watching the group. Taking that as permission to handle it how he wanted he continued winding Harold up.

  “What is it with you rich pricks and being massive wangs? I'm not going to do anything for you if you're going to be a cock about it.”

  “You're just going to leave it there?”

  “Yeah, probably, ask me nicely and I'll be happy to pop down there and search its pockets.”

  “I'll ask you with my sword, peasant.” he said taking a step forward.

  “Not a great idea mate.” said Gavin pulling two wands from his inventory, pointedly keeping them at his sides, well away from directly threatening Stewardson.

  Stewardson stopped, glancing around, finally realising where he was. Sheathing his sword he marched through the crowd of onlookers to stand on the opposite side of the pack, his team in tow.

  Val led the party further across the dunes headed for a distant forest. Gavin hung at the back of the pack for the most part, watching as members of the group were sent out individually and as different groups to fight various monsters.

  “Gavin, you're up.” Val called “Gavin?” A moment of awkward silence followed before Gavin appeared through the group

  “Sorry, wasn't paying attention.” Gavin said.

  “Right.” Val said narrowing her eyes “next ones all yours.”

  Gavin looked over the ridge to see a thick swirling vortex of dust zigzagging across the sand

  “Ugh, sand elemental. I hate elementals.” Gavin said as he looked at Val, then, noting her expression added “Fine, I'll get going.”

  He trudged down the hill, not bothering to equip his armour. Pulling a wand from his inventory he pointed it at the small tornado.

  Gavin shot out four bolts of lightning that arced white hot across the formless mass of dust and grit that rolled across the sand. A few seconds of continuous energy was all it took to scatter the elemental to the wind.

  He reached a hand through the dissipating cloud, turning it to ash as he looted it, then walked back to the group. He retrieved a glass of juice from his inventory to sip as the rest of the group stared at him.

  “I'd be interested to see how you perform without all of your plethora of magical items.” Val mused.

  “Would you deny Sadie her elemental powers or Julie her vision and Dexterity powers?”

  “No.” Val said after a moment's thought.

  “My powers are mostly crafting related, I have two enchanted items I didn't make myself and one of them is a ring that very slowly recovers my mana and the other is a shield I haven't ever used and havent had a chance to train with yet. My gear is my abilities.”

  “Fair enough, as you were.” Val said, giving Gavin an unreadable look.

  Gavin retreated back to the pack, silent.

  As they set up camp later that night Clergyman Bines retrieved an extradimensional pouch and started pulling out pack after pack of prepared meals wrapped up in square packages. Gavin approached him and offered to help distribute the goods. He took an armload and went about handing them out the the small cliques that had been forming.

  The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

  He found Judy sitting by herself outside a makeshift tent

  “You fight well.” he said surreptitiously, handing her a meal while he swiveled his neck around to see if her team leader was around.

  “Thanks.”

  “How attached are you to your team?” Gavin asked in a low voice.

  “Why?”

  “Well, you don't look super happy with yours and I've seen you're a valuable team member, Samania Starbourne and I are forming a team once I'm qualified and we'll be looking for good people.”

  “She's the one who got her team killed right after they qualified?”

  “Lessons hard learned are not easily forgotten, I trust her to keep me alive, though in fairness I did die once already while we were out adventuring.”

  “What?”

  “Nevermind that, I got better. Anyway, just think about it.”

  Gavin continued his route, making sure everyone was fed before he sat down to enjoy his own meal, not the field rations but his own home cooked meal, the smell wafting like poison through the camp.

  That done, he set about erecting the tent he’d bought earlier in the week. An octagonal canvas hut six metres across popped down into the sand directly from his inventory. It was tapered inwards like the top half of a cut gemstone though made from thick fabric and resembled a concrete bunker. He settled down for a nights sleep, contemplating his latest point to spend after having leveled up after his last fight.

  ***

  The next day Val sent a good chunk of the group off with Bines, including Judy and her team, leaving him, and a several people he could see had tenuous hope of passing the test.

  Gavin was deep in thought when his name was called several hours into their walk. They'd reached the forest and were not far into it when Val called him to the front.

  “Through there is a gorillion, it's a large ape with four arms, taller than you, they're strong and reasonably fast, but lack any abilities that aren't tearing arms off the hard way. You think you can handle it?”

  “I got it.” said Gavin, walking nonchalantly into the trees making more noise than was strictly necessary.

  The gorillion saw him before he saw it, with a burst of speed and power it crashed through the low ferns with thunderous pace, hauling on trees with spare arms for extra movement.

  Gavin picked up a small rock, throwing it with all his physical and spiritual strength, it plinked off the gorillions eyesocket, cutting a gouge through its thick fur and flesh. He rolled to the side as the monster crashed past, its arm extended to grasp at him. Gavin continued pelting the monster with rocks and twigs, all aimed at its face in an attempt to blind and enrage it.

  The gorillion threw a fist, catching Gavin’s hastily summoned bubble shield. It shattered on impact, the remaining strength of the blow smashing into his shoulder sending him flying through the air, he disappeared to pop back into existence behind it.

  Gavin resumed his concentrated assault on the monsters head, wounding it with dozens more superficial cuts. Blood flowed freely across its hairy face, clotting in its thick fur.

  Hefelt his foot catch on a root and he stumbled to the ground. Grasping at a fallen log he deconstructed it then teleported to avoid a double fist slam aimed at his prone body. Before his step through time came off cooldown the monster had rounded on him and was charging for the attack. He crafted a makeshift spear with the wood he’d looted, thrusting with all his strength, he felt the tip slam into thick muscle before it slid deep into the gorillions stomach.

  Two massive meaty paws gripped Gavin’s shoulders, hauling him into the air and squeezing. He was brought face to face with the creature, its two great yellow fangs jutting out of the minced-meat jaw. Gavin teleported atop the creature, summoning a dagger sized wooden splinter into his hand and thrust down piercing the gorillions eye. With a wail of rage it threw Gavin aside.

  He conjured another shield around himself as he crashed bodily into a tree on his way down. A second later he was up, thankful for his shield and increased resistance to physical damage.

  The gorillion raged on, smashing trees recklessly. Gavin ran as the beast pursued him, he ducked around trees, fled through bushes and dodged more and more erratic attacks. Soon the monster was completely blind from its bloody wounds that he'd been raining on it near constantly and the battle turned. Gavin stalked it, stinging it with a thousand cuts and bruised muscles.

  After a long, bloody fight the beast was exhausted, falling to the ground in a bloody mess. Gavin summoned his spear and thrust it into the beast's clavicle, burning it out with golden light.

  Returning to the group he chugged a healing potion, feeling the pain in his ribs lessen somewhat.

  “That's what you wanted to see right? That's me in a fight as unprepared as I can be, nothing but the powers I have on hand” Gavin said.

  Val wasn't paying attention though, her gaze was on the red beam of light shooting up into the sky in the distance.

  “What's that?” Gavin asked.

  “Bines is in trouble, he doesn't have offensive spells, only healing. Whatever it is, it's putting them down faster than he can keep them up.”

  “That looks like its close to where we were yesterday.” Gavin said, referencing his map “I can get us there.”

  His portal opened beside them, the gothic arch filling with pearlescent light.

  “No, I'm too high a rank to go through that, and I'm not putting any of you in danger, we go on foot” Val said.

  “With respect, Val, I think we can turn the tide, it's not killing them instantly so it's in a category we could theoretically deal with, with more bodies we could make the difference.”

  Val considered for a moment, her expression uncertain as she considered her options.

  “Go, I'll get there on foot” before sprinting through the trees at a blistering pace.

  “Staying or going?” He said turning to the group. “Make up your minds now, it will probably mean the difference between passing or failing the test, for what it's worth.”

  Without waiting for them to make up their minds he dashed through the portal. The other side was half way between the forest and where they’d camped the night before, getting his bearings Gavin sprinted off to the nearby beam of red light, using his teleport power the instant it came off cooldown to hop up the dunes. It was only half a kilometre away, but running in the sand was taxing his body even if he could mitigate the worst of it.

  As he ran Gavin opened his inventory, swapping out pieces of gear as he scrambled across the dunes, his jandals replaced with leather boots and casual clothes replaced with his basic combat gear.

  Bursting over the last dunes he saw a bloody sight, bodies lay scattered about the sand, Bines feverishly ran to each of them in turn, blasting them with healing magic, some lay dazed and some getting back up to rejoin the fight. Four remained standing, Nick up on a hill on the opposite side of the fight, peppering it with arrows, Stewardson standing his ground as his companion with the shield layered him up with buffs. Another woman, Sarah, attacked with a quarterstaff, raining rapid blows down on the six legged monster whenever it wasn't battering at them with massive clawed paws.

  Gavin recognised the beast from his book as a sand grubber, a van sized six legged monstrosity, extremely resilient and very deadly, it was a rank two monster, twice as powerful as a normal monster of its size, and perhaps the most dangerous thing that could spawn in the area.

  He raced down the dunes, his throwing star zipping out ahead of him to slice deeply into the beast's flank. He pushed on it with his force of will, feeling it lodge itself in deeper and its enchanted blades causing blood to flow freely. He pulled two wands from his inventory as he crashed to the sand below the beast's lashing paws, pointing them straight up at it.

  The sand grubber flew a dozen metres into the sky as all nine charges of his improved wands of light as a feather and gust of wind blasted into the monster. Its massive bulk became weightless and the buffeting winds sent it flying directly upwards and away from the group.

  Gavin stashed his two wands and retrieved two more, shooting eighteen bolts of blue magic at it, before stashing those to retrieve his final two wands. The light as a feather spell ended, and a second later the sandgrubber crashed to the ground with a cacophonous thump, throwing up sand in a wide cloud. Five bolts of lightning and a stream of liquid fire erupted from the ends with heat that was almost too hot to look at.

  The fire wand glowed perilously hot with the strain, so he threw it and another damaged wand in his inventory at the creature. A beam of lightning caught one of them as they flew past, overloading them with a deafening explosion inside its open maw. A gout of fire erupted from its mouth, shattering teeth and lacerating leathery flesh.

  Wands spent, Gavin charged, spear at the ready in one hand, and in the other a stack of rune carved throwing stars that he sent spinning into the whirling cloud of dust and smoke. Eruptions of fire exploded in the haze. His spear tip extended out as he leapt into the smoke to smash into the sand grubbers brow, the tip punching deep into its skull. Beams of golden yellow light erupted from its eye sockets as it burned out from the inside.

  Gavin slumped back to the sand, wispy white clouds filling his vision, exhausted, as silence descended on the battlefield.

  “What the fuck was that.” someone nearby asked incredulously

  “One minute mage.” Gavin said, sitting back on the sand as his adrenaline wore off.

  He lay in the hot sand, his gaze unfocused as he looked at the sky. He’d expended all his mana and stamina on his dash across the dunes and the fight that lasted no more than a few seconds. He felt utterly exhausted.

  He dragged himself reluctantly back to the present as he became aware that Bines’ face hovered above him.

  “Are you ok?” He asked.

  “Mostly, think I bruised some ribs getting into a fist fight with a gorillion earlier, got a bit of a stitch too, how's everyone else doing?”

  “You're the last.” Bines said warily, crouching to touch him, green light flooding his body “everyone else is alive, a little shaken, but alive.”

  “Cheers mate, here, you look shattered.” Gavin sat up, retrieving a pie and a cool glass of juice from his inventory offering them to the priest “smoko time. Have a break, looks like you earned one.”

  “Anyone else want a pie? I've got enough for everyone, not many drinks though.” Gavin called to the staring group.

  “I'll have one.” Nick said coming down from his position “I'm starving.”

  Gavin handed out hot pies wrapped in brown paper bags to those that wanted them. He received wary thanks from almost all present.

  “Stewardson, your team hungry? I've got steak and cheese, mince and cheese and bacon and egg, haven't managed to find a good recipe for potato top or the other classics though, here, have one, it was pretty rough out there, you need a good pie.”

  Stewardson took one hesitantly. “Thank you.” he said as if it hurt, then walked over to a small grass hillock in the dunes to brood.

  “No worries mate.” Gavin said, looking to find the guy with the shield and Judy.

  “Here, have a steak and cheese, they're my favourite”

  They each took one, biting into them, Judy's eyes going wide.

  “This is good.” she said dropping splinters of pastry.

  “Yeah, kiwi classic, they're a staple morning meal, or lunch, or afternoon tea, dinner too for that matter, I’ve never been a fan of the family sized ones though. Took me quite a while to make a recipe with this world's ingredients.”

  “This world?”

  “Yeah, I'm not from here, I guess I'm an alien or something? I only arrived on this planet like a month or so ago. Anyway, glad you guys are all good, I'm gonna go loot that monster, also, you two take this.” Gavin surreptitiously palmed a pouch of coins to Judy “you two split this up how you like, it's from the lizard you killed.”

  Gavin went over to the blackened and bloody corpse, touching its dry skin with a hand.

  [You have looted Sandgrubber]

  [You have looted:]

  [2 level 2 platinum coins]

  [20 level 2 gold coins]

  [200 level 2 silver coins]

  [2000 level 2 bronze coins]

  [20000 level 2 iron coins]

  [200000 level 2 copper coins]

  [potion of resilience]

  Gavin approached Bines “Hey mate, are you like with the guild in an official capacity, can you deal with splitting up the loot?”

  “I think it's best that Valerie does that, as the adventurers guild representative.”

  “That's fair.”

  Gavin's portal had come off cooldown so he opened it up back to where he'd come from after killing the gorillion, he poked his head through looking around.

  “Monsters dead guys, come on through, Val should be arriving shortly.”

  Leaving the portal open he found a quiet shaded spot to lie down in and pulled out a thick leather bound book, arcane runes inked into the covers and began to read, paying no mind to the glances he was getting.

  Some time later he looked up to see Val conversing with Bines, who pointed in his direction. Sighing, Gavin pocketed his book of magic theory.

  “How's it going Val” Gavin asked. Valerie looked absolutely exhausted from her run across kilometres of sand.

  “Worse than you it seems.”

  “Yeah, I bet you're knackered after getting here the long way, want a drink of juice, it's still cold.”

  “Yes, thank you.”

  Gavin proffered an ice cold glass of juice, then another as Val downed the first in three gulps.

  “Hungry? I bet you're a bacon and egg sort of person” Gavin said holding out a brown paper bag. Val took the pie but didn't open it.

  “Clergyman bines informs me you killed the sandgrubber more or less single handedly, that the combined efforts of the rest of the group barely scratched it but you had it dead in about twelve seconds?”

  “Yeah, completely depleted my resources though, I'm basically just a guy with a fancy spear now.”

  “Right.” Val said, her look inscrutable. “And you say you’ve been training under Samania Starbourne? For how long? You weren't in her previous batch of dead wardens.”

  “I actually was there. It was my first day on this world, I stumbled into a dimensional pocket where a dinosaur was half way through killing them.” Gavin said, not relishing the memory.

  “You’re a new arrival? Makes sense. You’re adapting well.”

  “Doing this sort of thing has been a dream of mine before I knew magic was even real.” Gavin said with honest sincerity. “Oh, right, speaking of adventuring, I looted that monster, Bines suggested you should distribute the money, I can't break up the coins evenly among everyone here.”

  “The guild has a process for this, everyone who was here will get an equal share when we return to the city.”

  “Equal share? Half of these people didn't even do anything. Judy here got hit at the start of the fight, didn't even put a scratch on it, even after Bines healed her she sat the rest of the fight out” Stewardson complained, having evidently eavesdropped on the conversation.

  Gavin glanced at Judy, raising an eyebrow. She looked away, clearly hurt.

  “Mate, if you want to distribute the loot by effort contributed to the fight, Clergyman bines is getting half, your mate with the shield is getting about ten percent, you're getting about six copper pieces, and I'm taking the rest. You had a dedicated support person loading you up with every buff under the sun, did you even manage to make it bleed or were you just wasting the healers mana burning though his healing powers every few seconds?”

  Val held up a finger to forestall any rebuttal before turning to look at Gavin.

  “Mr Gavin, I'll thank you not to escalate the situation with your assessment. As it stands the guild is now in charge of the distribution of loot, so what I say is law, everyone gets an even share.”

  “Except the guys who were with us in the forest. None of them followed me through my portal.”

  “Very well, I'll make sure only those present get a share.”

  “So, are we clearing out more monsters this arvo?” Gavin asked, standing up and stretching.

  “Yes, we still have three to complete.”

  They remained as a group for the rest of the day, Val sent the group that had been with Gavin in the forest out one more time with Bines, leaving Gavin with the main group. He noticed Stewardson bickering darkly below his breath with his team who had been shooting him the odd glance.

  “Okay, Harold, Gavin, you're up.” Val called as the day was drawing to a close.

  “What are we dealing with?” Gavin asked, pushing through to the front of the group.

  “Marhounds, it's unusual they'd be this far out of their natural territory, but they're there and they need to be dead.”

  Stewardson harumphed “I don't need his help.”

  “Mate, could I have a word privately?”

  “Fine.” he stalked off some distance where they wouldn't be observed “what?”

  “You know why Val is putting us together right?”

  “And whys that? You seem to be awfully chatty with her.”

  “She's testing you.”

  “She's seen me fight.”

  “Sure. What she hasn't seen is you work well in a team. You've had someone there to cover for you every time like they're another piece of equipment, you've just spent the last day pissing off everyone around you. Val wants to see that you can work as a team, that you're not just going to sacrifice your people for your own glory. You're gonna fail if you don't work with me.’

  “She wouldn't dare fail me.”

  “Mate, she failed your bro before we'd even left the guild grounds.”

  “Fine. Stay behind me and keep them off my back.”

  “If that's what you want.” Gavin shrugged.

  Stewardsons eyes narrowed dangerously “Don't you dare sabotage me.”

  “Mate, I don't need to. You're doing a good job of that yourself.”

  “What's that supposed to mean?”

  “Think about what I just told you.” Gavin said done with the conversation.

  Hestrode back to the group, Stewardson trailing behind as he equipped his battle attire.

  “What's your game?” Stewardson said to his back as he looked out over the pack of hounds.

  “Just trying to be the best man I can be.” Gavin said, holding out his arms to either side, palms facing upwards. “Its all I want, do some good, kill some monsters, help some people that need it. Theres nothing more to it than that.”

  The pair walked side by side into combat, Gavin's spear twirling in his hand as he limbered up. Harold had his sword slung casually over a shoulder.

  “Just FYI, I'm basically all out of tricks, all I've got is my spear and this.” He said, indicating his mithril throwing star as he threw it up to buzz over his head “also a couple potions, in fact, I think now's a good time to have this strength potion.” he said, taking it from his inventory.

  The marhounds came on thick and fast, quickly surrounding them. Gavin and Harold fought back to back, Gavin's spear sweeping and thrusting, his star biting deeply through the crowding monsters. Harold's sword danced as if it were no more cumbersome than a foil. He didn't have Sam's blur power but he did have his own unique set, he'd occasionally loose a crescent of silver energy with an attack, sending the blade out to slice into several creatures before the energy dissipated. As the fight drew on his sword hummed with crackling lightning, sizzling flesh and arcing out to nearby hounds with increasing power.

  One marhound dipped past Gavin's guard and he spun to kill it as it lunged for Harold. He turned back to the fight to see two more had launched themselves at him.

  “Harold, behind you” Gavin called.

  One of the hounds tried to latch onto Gavin's arm but was deflected temporarily by a bubble shield as he skewered the second. More hounds bore down in his moment of weakness. Harold turned to help Gavin, sawing the gnawing dogs head clean off. More hounds were getting in, now that their guard was down. Gavin rose a portal up in the middle of the fight

  “Get through there.”

  He saw Harold leap for the portal before he stepped through as well, both emerging a few metres away on the other side of the combat.

  “Keep it open” Harold called as they reengaged the marhounds from behind

  The two of them began mounting a hit and run skirmish, striking several down before running back through the portal to attack from behind. Gavin's throwing star skipped through the monsters, cutting thin lines across their flanks. The bleeding effect began to take its toll, the hounds flagging as their life leaked out in dozens of tiny wounds making the fight easier the longer it went.

  Soon Harold and Gavin stood panting in a field of dead. Gavin moved through, touching each in turn.

  [You have looted fourty Marhound]

  [You have looted:]

  [160 level 1 silver coins]

  [640 level 1 bronze coins]

  [2560 level 1 iron coins]

  [12 marhound leather]

  [ring of fire resistance]

  “Here's half of the coins, there's a ring of fire resistance and some leather, if you give me an hour or so to study the ring you can have it.”

  “Thank you.” Harold said after a pause.

  “No worries mate. That was a good idea for me to keep the portal open like that, it'll make fighting the less intelligent monsters much easier.”

  They pitched camp not long after. They had field rations for dinner, everyone except Gavin who'd packed his own meals. Afterwards he went off to find a quiet spot to sit and think. The dunes around him rolled like unmoving waves, a great streak of stars strung across the sky like Christmas lights. It could have almost been like his childhood memories of camping at the beach.

  He thought about his progress with his magical powers. He was over two thirds the way through his build and honing in on where he wanted to end up. He still wanted to find a vision power and some sort of battlefield control spell but he was willing to wait to expand his powers further until he found the exact right fit now he had a workable base. A special attack he could use as his bread and butter wouldn't go amis, though he figured he could probably just simulate that with an enchantment or specialist gear for specific scenarios.

  He thought back to how Sam said her powers worked and the differences between them. She was a brawler, every one of her powers designed to be the centre of a fight and have everyone else work around her. He couldn’t deny its effectiveness, but he needed more esoteric abilities to feel comfortable, ones applicable to as many situations as possible so he could deal with problems that violence didn’t solve. He wanted to be the glue that held the team together and the fly in the ointment of anyone who dared pull it apart.

  His Body of iron power would be his next ability to rank up. The bludgeonings he'd taken at the hands of Sam's training swords combined with maulings and beatings from the various monsters he'd fought. Force of will was not far behind it. His near constant use of it had seen a steady increase, even though he almost never got to strain his ability while using it.

  He was about to set up his tent and turn in for the night when he noticed Valerie watching from a short distance away.

  “Hey Val.” He said, his tone cheerful as he pulled himself out of his thoughts.

  “Got a minute?” She said, walking up to him.

  “Sure. Step into my office.” he said popping his sleeping quarters out of his inventory.

  Gavin pulled the flap closed behind him as Val stepped into his tent.

  “Why do you need a tent this big?” Val asked looking around the enormous room that held only a bedroll and blanket.

  “You came here for a reason?” Gavin asked.

  “I wanted to talk to you about today.”

  “Go ahead.”

  “How much did Samania tell you about what the test would entail?”

  “Almost nothing, that I'd need to prove I was worthy, that there would be fighting.”

  “And you guessed what I've been testing you on. Using your wits not your wallet, working as a team?”

  “My world has a lot of stories, one of the most profitable jobs on my world is to come up with new ones or present old legends with a slightly different twist. Millions of people watch any given story when it's released to the public, and I've made it my business to watch a damn lot of them.”

  “Your point?”

  “There’s noting new under the sun. There’s a template people use called the heroes journey, its a load of crap, but basically it says if you squint your eyes hard enough every story is the same. Any test you were going to give me would be about demonstrating good character or using my head when the stakes are high. My skills favour being prepared for any eventuality, it was obvious you'd want to see me fight when I was unprepared.”

  “And Harold Stewardson?”

  “Heard that chat did you? Well, you more or less told me what you wanted from him the second you paired me with him.”

  “I did?”

  “I've been getting under his skin pretty constantly since we met, because of who he is and who I am. He's headed on the right track to get someone killed unless he can learn to work as part of a team right? You wanted to see if he could work with someone who's been annoying him consistently over the past few days.”

  “That's a fairly accurate assessment of my thought process.”

  “But that's not why you're here is it? You wanted to talk about the other thing?”

  “You killing the sand grubber.”

  “What are your thoughts?” Gavin asked, feeling she had something to get off her chest.

  “You did a good job, not just killing it but your reasoning as to why you thought you could help.” She said.

  “To be one hundred percent honest, I'd have found any number of reasons to justify going even if the circumstances were worse.” Gavin said truthfully. “These people might not be my friends but I'm not going to sit around and watch people die when I could maybe have done something to stop it regardless of the risk.”

  “That was a concern I've had about you Gavin. That attitude will get you or your whole team killed eventually. I understand you've already died once.”

  “Bines told you about that?”

  “No, I read it in your file.” Val said flippantly.

  “I have a file?” Gavin asked surprised.

  “You killed a warden in broad daylight, of course you have a file.”

  “He attacked me first, and it was two, sort of, im not exactly- right, not the point.”

  “Which is why” Valerie said, forging on ahead “No one has come after you. You didn't think it was odd that you killed someone and no one said even a word about it?”

  “I figured Sams mum made it go away.”

  “Anabelle Starbourne might have a lot of influence, but she is ultimately an administrator, the decision to punish you was out of her hands as soon as she declared a conflict of interest. The chair of the Edomont branch himself determined no action should be taken against you, and would probably have extracted concessions on your behalf if Lady Alana suggested that avoiding further conflict was in everyone's best interests.”

  “I think we're straying a little off topic, you're concerned about my casual attitude to danger?” Gavin said, for once being the one to keep a conversation on track.

  “Very.”

  “My first day on this planet I jumped in to help Sam fight a bonesnapper while I was injured from my first ever encounter with a monster, my only magical power was a map showing about three kilometers of bush and some deep pockets. Sam would be dead if I didn't throw caution to the wind, and I'd probably have someone running medical experiments on me right now if she and her family didn't shelter me.”

  “Throwing away your own life to attempt to save another is a good way to get you and everyone around you killed Gavin.” Val said, unconsciously touching the scar on her jaw.

  “Live to fight another day?” Gavin said finding the words distasteful.

  “Yes.” The real danger in this world is the unending waves of demons and monsters popping up across the planet, all we can do is hold them off, there will never be a time where they aren't a threat. The way to do the most good is to be cautious, if you're not careful people will die and then all the good you may have done over the next hundred or more years will never happen.”

  “I don't think I could live with myself if I just let someone die if I had even a chance to save them. There's a saying from one of those stories i mentioned, with great power comes great responsibility I've got power now, not as much as most but more than some, I have a duty to use that power to protect people.”

  Val gave Gavin a wry smile “well Gavin, you're either going to end up one of the greats or end up dead. I hope you're strong enough to live with the consequences.”

  “You're not just giving me this talk because you disagree with my attitude are you, you've lived it and lost people?” Gavin asked looking at her scar.

  “Yes.” Val said, her veneer of stern authority cracking, suddenly she looked very old. “I once thought I was going to conquer the world, save everyone, go further than anyone from this town had gone before. I took on challenges I shouldn't have and got away with it until I led my team into a fight we couldn't handle. Now my friends are dead and all that good in the world they could have done is gone because I snatched that future away from them. Like your friend did, like you and Nick and Harold will one day too. You’ve got the same attitude I used to, people will follow you because you make them believe they can do anything, Samania Starbourne makes people want to follow her because shes a brilliant fighter. The two of you together will need to be careful you don't run head first into the worst dangers you can find.”

  Gavin was silent for an uncomfortable minute while Val’s stoic demeanour appeared as thin as paper in the dim light.

  “I'm sorry Val.” he said as he considered, really considered her words. “I’ll think about it, thanks for the talk, I know it probably wasn't easy for you.”

  Gavin offered her a hand to shake, nodding to her with respect as she clasped it in her hard calloused hand.

  “Samanias mum has forbidden her to form a team.” Gavin said, letting go.

  “I heard.” Val said.

  “When you pass me, I'm going to be forming a team.”

  “You? With Sam and who else?”

  “I asked Judy to join me.”

  Val nodded “She's quite talented. Anyone else here stand out to you?”

  “Not especially. Quite a few seem good but not great, and the ones who are any good have conflicting personalities.”

  “Nick and Harold?” Val smirked “that would be a disaster.”

  “Yes. They're like me with some of the ugly side closer to the surface. Arrogant, prideful.”

  “They will struggle to hold teams together.”

  “That sounds like a them problem though, I'm more interested in my team.”

  “Which is currently yourself, Samania Starbourne and potentially Judy.”

  “We need a healer and at least one more, I'm thinking a front liner which would leave me more flexible to be ranged support with the ability to fill a front line role if necessary.”

  “I'd agree with that.” Val said nodding.

  “So we need a good front line combatant.” Gavin said, staring at Val and her swords seriously.

  Val froze, irritation flashing on her face before she schooled it back to her usual stoic scorn.

  “No.” she said “don't even ask me that, it's a serious conflict of interest.”

  Gavin shrugged. “Just think about it, you know you’d be a good influence on us. I won't ask again.”

  “You have some stones Gavin I'll give you that.”

  He laughed “There's another saying from my world, fortune favours the bold.”

  “Is that from another story?”

  “Yes, I think so, not actually sure where that one comes from though.”

  “I should get back to camp.”

  “Thanks for the chat Val, I'll take what you said into consideration.”

  After Valerie left the tent, Gavin closed and buckled the flap behind her. He readied his sleeping arrangements and prepared to do a little work on his item situation. He was just pulling out some materials for a new project when he heard footsteps in the sand outside.

  He opened up his tent to see Judy, her eyes red and face grim.

  “Come on in.” Gavin said gesturing for her to come inside “can't offer you tea or a chair but there's a nice floor to sit on.”

  “Is the offer to join your team still available?” Judy said tersely.

  “Indefinitely.” Gavin said, flashing her a smile.

  “I want to join.”

  “Does Harold know?”

  “He knows I'm out of his team. I just stormed out on him.” Judy said, crinkling her mouth wryly.

  “Good for you. Well, welcome to the team”

  “Just like that?”

  “Just like that. You'd be a good fit for us. Know any good healers?”

  “Not that aren't attached to other teams already.”

  “Never mind, I might have a chat to Florrin, she might be able to send someone our way though I'm a little bit miffed with her at the moment.”

  “You can't just talk about the gods like that.” Judy said.

  “Seems to have gone well for me so far.” Gavin shrugged

  “So far?”

  “I had a chat with Soliece on my first day here, she bribed me not to do a thing, then I had a chat with Florrin after this prick killed me, she was nice at the time, she gave me a bit of a pep talk after the whole dying thing, she gave me a soul power that I gave to Sam.”

  “You gave samania a soul power? What did she give you in exchange?”

  “She gave me friendship, I gave her a piece of sparkly stone, it wasn't much of an exchange.”

  “They're worth a lot of money.”

  “I think I can technically make infinite money, well, infinite things I can sell for money which I've been very cautious about exploiting.”

  “You can do what?”

  “Oh, infinite gold or whatever is nothing, it's super tedious to do, I think killing monsters is probably more profitable, which is why I haven't got a visit from some god of money yet. I think gods find people from off planet interesting which is why they like popping in for chats every now and then.”

  “There isn't a god of money. And the ones that do exist won't like you talking about them so casually.”

  “The gods are well aware of my thoughts on them, if they had an issue with me they'd have smited me the second I came into this world, or they'd send someone to kick my teeth in, or come tell me to knock it off in person.”

  “You're going to get yourself branded a heretic one of these days.”

  “Then I'll have to get strong enough so that no one would try.”

  “You've got some pretty lofty ambitions then.”

  “You don't even know the half of it. Anyway, why don't you grab your stuff, we can talk team strategy while I work on some things.”

  “I've already got my tent set up”

  “No worries, I can go with you and chuck all your stuff in my inventory.”

  “Okay, I'd appreciate not having to sleep out near Stewardson tonight, he's got a vindictive streak.”

  “Yeah, I can see that.”

  They walked out into the chill night, a gentle breeze had picked up, drawing in salty sea air. Their way was bright enough to see by the light of the full moon, casting shadows that loomed off over the dunes.

  “So what prompted your blow-out with Harold?” Gavin asked as they navigated the camp.

  Judy sighed “he started talking about how we needed to act more like a proper team, how everyone needs to pull their weight and I just couldn't do it anymore.”

  “Ahh… I think he may have been talking about himself as much as everyone else there.”

  Judy stopped stunned “he what?”

  “I may have told him that he'd fail the entry test if he kept showboating and didn't consider his team.”

  “Well this is going to be awkward.” Judy said.

  “Reconsidering your choice?”

  “No, it's been a long time coming, he won't turn over a new leaf. People like him don't change for long.”

  Gavin shrugged “maybe, maybe not, but you're definitely burning a bridge.”

  “Burning bridges I can do.” Judy said shrugging a shoulder.

  “That's fair. You're part of the team now, and our team sticks together.”

  “You're not concerned I'll abandon you too?”

  “Not especially. If the team isn't a good fit we won't begrudge you moving on. We're offering friendship and the opportunity to get paid killing monsters.” Gavin said.

  “I guess that's all I can ask.”

  “Good. Now let's hope Harold isn't dumb enough to start trouble while we're out here.”

  Judy nodded her agreement, leading Gavin to her tent. Harold was there, his face livid.

  “Evening Harold.” Gavin called as they drew near.

  “Huh. I should have known. This is your game. You're trying to poach my team members.”

  “Well, actually yeah, I guess.” Gavin admitted, scratching his chin “I can see how this looks from your perspective.”

  “All this time you were playing me, manipulating me. This is all your doing.”

  “Bro, I don't know what you're on but this is all your doing. All I did was tell Judy she'd be welcome on our team. You made her jump, I just let her know there was somewhere to land.”

  “You're good with words, you've been in my ear, in her ear. You're just trying to take what's mine.” Harold fumed.

  “Dude, Judy isn't yours and she isn't mine, she can make her own choices. I know you genuinely tried to be more of a team player, but you've been such an absolute cockhead for such a long time that you've got a lot of groundwork to lay before you can start pretending you're a changed man.”

  “Shut up Gavin. You come off all high and mighty, like you're the smartest person the room, throwing around insults as if you're not even more guilty of everything you claim about others.” Harold said fuming.

  “Mate, firstly, I'm an sparkie, I usually am the smartest one in the room, and secondly, I don't pretend I'm not arrogant or a bit of a prick, what I do do is respect other people until they show they don't deserve it.”

  Harold took a step forward, his fists balled.

  “Dude, make the smart choice here and drop it. I'm not going to fight you and you can't touch me without it bringing a world of hurt down on yourself in return. Either one or both of us pass the test and then any bad blood between us dies. I'm not up to speed on what the punishments are for guild members fighting other guild members but I do know that killing someone who attacks you first isn't punished at all. Walk away, we can forget about each other ever existing by the end of tomorrow.” Gavin said attempting to circle past him.

  “Fine. Go play along together. But you better believe I won't forget what you did.”

  “I probably will. We have a saying on my world, the best revenge is a life lived well. Hope you have a good one mate.” Gavin said solemnly.

  Harold turned and stalked off into the night kicking up a trail of sand.

  “Wonder what Val's going to do about him” Gavin mused.

  “She'll pass him. He was in the group of people who didn’t need extra testing.” Judy said confidently.

  “I think Val is testing our attitudes more than our ability, I wouldn't be surprised if the big group was just people she already knew the results for and wouldn't change their grade regardless of how they performed. Anyway, that's a later problem. Let's get your stuff.”

  They stayed up for a little while later discussing team tactics and where Judy saw herself fitting in with the team. What sort of gear she needed and what skills she had so far, and what she wanted to unlock. They fell asleep in their respective beds on opposite sides of the tent.

  The next morning Gavin was up early, he went out for a quick run, returning when the sun was just cresting the horizon. The sea breeze was chilly and was strong enough to pick up stray sand, stinging exposed shins. Returning to his tent he found Judy just waking up.

  “Where have you been?” She asked rubbing sleep from her eyes.

  “For a run. Sam and I usually go for a run in the mornings, feel free to join us, Sam might ask more emphatically though, she can be hard to say no to.”

  “I'll think about it. I'm usually up late into the night practicing then get a sleep in.”

  “We'll work out a routine. You don't strike me as the sort of person who shirks training, I've just spent a day and a half watching you hit pretty much every target even with team mates in the way jumping and diving in the path of your arrows"

  “I train in the evenings after Harold has had enough wandering around the countryside killing monsters.”

  “Were you his scout? I can't imagine Harold or his offsider would be the types to scout.”

  “I was, though I don't have any powers useful for scouting aside from sharper vision.”

  “Do you want to take on a scouting role with our team?”

  Judy shrugged “I'm not fussed.”

  “It's a pretty big commitment, you'd be permanently changing your soul just to convenience us. I'd prefer you be absolutely sure what you want to do and that you're doing it because it's what you want not what we want.”

  “I'll add that to the list of things to think about.”

  “We've got plenty of time, Ive got pretty much all of my core powers, I just need to go up a couple levels so my next tier of abilities unlocks which means killing lots of monsters. Ill be training with just the ones I have unless a god wants to swing by now and give me one? Anyone? No? Worth a shot.”

  “Gods won't just show up and give you powers Gavin, that's not how that works.”

  “I'll make you a bet. I say one or another god will offer me a magic power personally before I’ve filled out my set. I bet they’ll clamber over each other to get some sort of leverage over me.”

  “What do I get if I win?” Judy asked, his boast pushing her inclination to accept almost anything he’d wager.

  “I'll buy you the rest of your powers.”

  Judy's eyes bulged “and what do you get if you win?”

  “Bragging rights?”

  “Come on, that's not a reward, and Id rather you didn’t bring it up every other day in the unlikely event you win.”

  “Being right is a pretty big reward, but if you insist, you buy me dinner.”

  “It's the first day of me being in your team and you're making a pass at me?”

  “Hey, friends can eat out together, invite Sam along too, but you're paying.”

  “Okay, I'll take that bet, it's not like you're going to win.”

  “If you say so. It's time to get up anyway, field rations are being served.”

  Judy rolled out of her bedroll and stretched “do team mates get the good meals?”

  “Uhh, yeah, sure.” Gavin said turning red, averting his eyes

  “Oh come off it, I'm wearing clothes” Judy said following his gaze.

  “Barely. Anyway, I'll see you out with the rest of the group.”

  “We could just eat in here where it's warm.”

  “I've been getting a lot of enjoyment watching Harold eat field rations while I get bacon and eggs.”

  “Actually that does sound good, mind putting my gear in your dimensional space?”

  “Ohh yeah sure. Just leave anything you want stored in here and I'll stash it all together.”

  “I won't be a minute.” Judy said.

  She pulled on her combat gear that was essentially light clothes with hardened leather plates strapped to it to cover the vital areas.

  “We're definitely sorting you out with some better gear.” Gavin said when she was done.

  “What's wrong with my gear? Its functional.”

  “Mate, you've got to look badass while you're killing monsters.’

  “I don't think that's a requirement.”

  “Tell me that when you saw me come dashing in down off the sand dunes in my shiny dinosaur cloak, do a big slide through the sand and absolutely blasted the sand grubber to smithereens it wasn't the coolest thing you've ever seen.”

  “I was unconscious, I didn't see what happened.” Judy said.

  “Well that's lame. So you haven't even seen me cut loose?”

  “No, all I've seen is your fight with Nick and the time you killed the sand elemental.”

  “You should have seen me just before the sand grubber, I'd only just finished fist fighting a gorillion.”

  “You fist fought a gorillion?”

  “Yeah, but I cheated. I threw stones. Did you want eggs on toast, fruit salad and yoghurt or crepes?”

  “What are crepes?” Judy asked suspiciously.

  “They’re like thin pancakes.”

  “What's a pancake?”

  “Like a pikelet except bigger and less sweet.

  “Nevermind, give me whatever.”