The next few days passed with only mild irritations. Rather, they were mild irritations for Terry. He suspected the Kelima found the process of fighting monsters several times a day rather taxing. Although he did take great care not to let things devolve quite as much as he had in that first fight when she’d been injured so badly. Waiting around for another three or four days while she slept off another healing potion was not on his agenda. Beyond her displeasure at all the fighting, she also didn’t seem pleased with his culinary choices.

  “Eat up!” said Terry with a bright smile, holding out a plate.

  Kelima stared at the plate in abject horror.

  “That’s meat from a monster.”

  “Your observation skills are truly masterful,” answered Terry, not withdrawing the plate.

  “First, it’s bland, dried foods. Now, it’s monster meat?”

  Terry looked down at the plate and then back up at Kelima.

  “Yep.”

  “I won’t eat that. I can’t eat that. It’ll kill me.”

  “That’s patently untrue. I don’t know where that idea comes from. I’ve eaten plenty of this stuff, and it didn’t kill me. More importantly, you’re not allowed to complain about how unfair it is for me to be this strong if you won’t do what you need to do to get stronger.”

  An expression of pure skepticism crossed the noble girl’s face.

  “You expect me to believe that you got that strong because you were eating monster meat?”

  “It’s not the only reason, but it is one of them. Now, open wide. Nom, nom, nom.”

  “I’m not a baby!”

  “You’re right, but strays can’t afford to be picky about what they eat.”

  Terry thought he might have pushed it a little too far when Kelima’s face went a dark shade of red.

  “Stop calling me that,” she said in a cold, angry tone.

  “I’ll stop calling you that when you stop raising objections every damn time that I try to do things that will help you get stronger,” snapped Terry. “Now. Eat the goddamn food.”

  The two had a short-lived staring contest that ended when Kelima snatched the plate from him, very nearly sending the meat sliding off the plate. Terry watched in keen interest as she pulled a bit of the meat free, raised it to her nose, and sniffed. She made a gagging noise. Then, closing her eyes, she put the bit of meat into her mouth, hurriedly chewed, and swallowed it.

  “Ugh. That’s so gamey. Couldn’t you have seasoned it a bit with something?”

  “You aren’t always going to have a spice rack handy. Besides, I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

  Stolen story; please report.

  Terry took a bite of the meat from his own plate and froze the moment it hit his mouth. God in heaven, that is truly terrible. He made himself chew the meat and swallow.

  “Nom. Nom. Nom,” said Kelima with a triumphant look.

  “Yeah, okay,” said Terry while lifting a hand in surrender. “This is worse than usual. It definitely needs something. A lot of something.”

  In the end, it took an almost obscene amount of salt and pepper to make the meat on their plates even mildly palatable. I really should have seasoned this stuff as it cooked. While the meat didn’t do much for Terry, he saw it the moment Kelima felt the change. Her eyes flew wide, and she shot to her feet.

  “I thought you were lying!” she shouted.

  “That’s a little hurtful.”

  “Six months,” answered Kelima, parroting his own words back at him.

  “I didn’t say it wasn’t justified. Just hurtful. Besides, no way would I have choked down that meat solely to play a joke on you. There’s commitment, and then there’s stupidity.”

  “Does this happen every time you eat monster meat?” asked Kelima in a jittery tone as she paced back and forth.

  “At first. There’s some kind of upper limit that I won’t even pretend to understand. I don’t get much from eating this stuff anymore. It may just be that these monsters aren’t powerful enough. But I expect you’ll see some benefits for a while.”

  “This is amazing! And stomach turning, but amazing! Why doesn’t everyone do this?”

  “How could I possibly know the answer to that?” asked Terry.

  “Oh, right,” said Kelima with a nod. “Still, we need to tell everyone about this.”

  “I don’t see why,” said Terry.

  “How about so they can get stronger! If everyone was stronger, towns wouldn’t be at so much risk.”

  “First, they won’t believe you. If you weren’t trapped out here in the middle of nowhere with me, would you have eaten that meat?”

  Kelima hemmed and hawed for several moments before she slumped a little and said, “No.”

  “Second, none of that sounds like a me problem. You can tell whoever you want, but I’m not interested in spearheading a marketing campaign for the benefits of monster meat.”

  “Marketing?” asked Kelima.

  “Third—” said Terry before trailing off.

  “Third?”

  “I’m thinking. I’m sure that there is a third reason. Why don’t we just pretend I thought of it?”

  “Does it matter?”

  “Of course, it matters. Reasons need to come in threes.”

  “I… But why?”

  Terry shrugged and said, “I don’t know. That’s just the rule. There’s probably some psychological basis for it, like three reasons feel more convincing or something.”

  “That seems a little suspect.”

  “Take it up with god or, you know, whichever demonic sadist is in charge of things. Also, you should sit back down.”

  “Why?”

  Terry gave her a big, evil grin.

  “You didn’t think you were done eating, did you? There are still pounds of this meat left. Settle in. It’s gonna be a long evening.”

  “You’re going to eat some of it, right?” asked Kelima in a weak voice.

  “Oh, silly girl. I want you to get the full benefits from it.”

  “Is that your way of saying you can’t stand the taste of it?”

  “That’s absolutely my way of saying that I’m not eating any more of that foulness," answered Terry with a shudder. "Not on purpose anyway. However, choking it down really will make you stronger.”

  For a few seconds, Terry thought that Kelima might actually run away. He wouldn’t have blamed her either. He’d eaten worse before, but only a few times. An expression of defeat crossed her face, which was swiftly replaced with resolve. She sat down and nodded.

  “I’m ready.”

  Terry stared at her briefly before he shrugged and dished up some more of the meat. He held it out and noticed that her hand trembled a little as she reached for it. She didn’t start eating immediately.

  “I don’t suppose I can have the salt and pepper.”

  Ever since arriving in Chinese Period Drama Hell, Terry hadn’t concerned himself much with things like being nice. The look of utter misery on Kelima’s face, however, stirred a bit of compassion that had been hiding from the light of day for a while. Yeah, he might have eaten a lot of pretty terrible monster meat without seasonings, but that didn’t mean he needed to make things quite that hard for her.

  “Sure,” he said. “Even I’m not cruel enough to make you eat this garbage without salt.”