Joshua wouldn't call himself a fan of skydiving.

  He has a healthy fear of heights, with a flying Pokemon it made it easier to get used to being up high.

  But if he had a nickel for each time he freefalled and somehow survived, he would have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.

  Okay, no. That was dumb, that was an awful joke.

  Joshua groans as he pushes himself up.

  Quickly checking over himself, he finds that the suit is once again proving to be the best thing he's ever invested in, as it absorbed most of the blow.

  Still hurts like a bitch though.

  His arm is… strangely okay? He never figured out if his Minecraft Body carried over, but with the way his pain is slowly but steadily getting better, he wonders if there's weight in the idea that he still has it.

  Then again, Legends Arceus had a damage system simir to Call Of Duty of all things, as long as you aren't getting actively damaged you regain health…

  For God's sake, FOCUS!

  “Now's not the time…”

  Joshua looks around.

  He's ying on a slope, with trees surrounding him, boulders lie on the grass in random intervals.

  Joshua prods at the link, and sighs in relief.

  She's fine. Hurt, but fine. Her wing is singed and needs treatment, but it's not in critical state due to her Heal Pulse.

  Uriel managed to catch her, lessening the blow considerably. Joshua will remember to give her extra portions ter.

  Jophiel is fine, the thought makes him almost crumple in relief. Jophiel is feeling the same on her end.

  Thank God.

  The link is ever so slightly muffled, must be because of the distance. He can feel the distance between them, and it's not… a bit too far for comfort..

  [Joshua!]

  [What happened?!]

  [Are you okay?!]

  “Yeah. I'm fine” He grumbles as he stands up, dusting himself off. His legs feel like jelly, but it's nothing he hasn't handled before.

  But his mind is on something else.

  It doesn't take a genius to figure out that somebody was trying to kill him. And judging from the burning hot rage coming from Jophiel, she must have figured it out too.

  He freezes.

  Someone tried to kill him.

  No, someone tried to ASSASSINATE him.

  But unlike all the other times he's had frightening realizations, he's… shockingly calm.

  Don't get him wrong, it's still stressful, but it seems… almost nostalgic?

  No that's not the word.

  After an entire week of the Nightmare World where nothing makes sense and everything wants to kill you, an assassination attempt seems… more grounded, honestly.

  It's familiar in some weird, messed up way.

  Some mischievous part of him finds some dark comfort in that.

  “To be honest this is probably the closest I've felt to being home”

  [WHAT?!]

  [...what?]

  [StevenStoneOffical: Do you remember when I said you really need to expin these things you say?]

  [StevenStoneOffical: This is one of them.]

  “Later”

  Now. On to the important thing.

  “Where am I?”

  And…

  “Who the fuck just shot me?”

  He tries not to swear, but it's hard not to at this moment.

  Checking his map, he raises an eyebrow.

  >HEARTWOOD FOREST<

  …Heartwood was a forest? He doesn't remember that. Then again, it was a very small part of the in-game map, so it may have just been transted.

  He's right in the middle of it too, fun.

  Whatever the case, he has to make his way back to the two mares.

  The slope makes standing awkward, and unfortunately the link is pointing him upwards, so… upwards it is.

  “What the hell even was that…?”

  [StevenStoneOffical: Shadow Ball.]

  [I<3Gible: Shadow ball, dark type move]

  [SabrinaOfficial: shadow ball]

  [IonoZone: I dunno (゜?。)]

  [TulipOfficial: Shadow Ball]

  “Thanks Iono”

  [IonoZone: ur welcome! (*≧?≦)? ]

  [I<3Gible: really?]

  The first suspect that goes through his head is, obviously, Volo. He's been absent from Jubilife, and the guy certainly has motive to attack him for his ptes.

  …but what if he didn't do it?

  Who else even IS there?

  …Beni?

  Joshua plucks off a Pokeball and releases Ace, who along with Cyndaquil are his only Pokemon right now.

  The Vaporeon materializes beside him, taking a moment to adjust her footing on the uneven terrain.

  “As romantic as this walk in the woods shit is, you DO remember I ain't exactly a fighter, right?”

  “Didn't you kill a dragon?”

  She scoffs.

  “Yeah, but that's when I had a massive fuck-you ser cannon and several million LE to burn through. Fuck am I gonna do? Throttle Pokemon with my bare hooves- wait, fuck- paws?”

  “Use your MOVES, Ace”

  “You think I know how that bck magic works?!” She spits. “I'm still getting used to being mostly WATER, dude, I thought I'd be getting dicked down right now, not going combat training”

  Joshua just stares at her, silently going over that in his head.

  She looks back, curious, but more contemptive.

  “...the pawjob probably goes insane, though”

  “We almost got murdered and that's what you're thinking of?”

  She just shrugs, she taps the back of his leg like she's pcing a hand on his shoulder.

  “Joshy, my stupid sexy monkey friend. I've had so much bullshit happen to me over the years that this shit? Not even gonna remember it”

  …the worst part is that he completely understands that.

  Sighing, he decides to just bring out Cyndaquil as well, she at least knows how to fight.

  The fiery echidna looks around cautiously, the fmes on her back fring in intensity, she stays close to Joshua’s legs.

  How nice.

  They're lulled to silence for a bit as the conversation dies out. It's… peaceful…

  There's life in it, distant sounds and shuffling leaves, cries of Pokemon faintly come from beyond the trees.

  It's nice, but there's one small issue.

  Joshua REALLY doesn't like forests.

  The piece of Joshua, the one responsible for keeping him alive, is practically BURNING right now. Being surrounded by trees, not having a good way to defend himself…

  …the chilling feeling of being watched.

  Is that even real? Or is he imagining it?

  Was that a figure watching him in the distance? Long and pale, gaping maw of bck gums and sharp teeth.

  It's gone now, or is it?

  Why is he breathing so hard?

  Joshua's hand twitches, his UI flickering in and out. Does he have a cross? No he lost those, can he make one? He doesn't have his knife, why are the trees getting closer?

  Why is the link not working?!

  “Joshua” An older, slightly raspy but distinctly feminine voice cuts through.

  Gold eyes meet bck.

  “Thirty-two times two”

  “...w-what?”

  “Thirty-two, then times it by two. What is it?”

  Joshua's mind swirls and blurs like fog, but given clear direction, it makes a solid connection.

  “...sixty-four?”

  “Good. Thirteen times three”

  “...wha…what's even…”

  “Shut up. Thirteen times three, what is it?”

  “...Thirty-nine?”

  “Now add those two together”

  Joshua stares at her, confused.

  Oh. He's in Heartwood.

  Why does his chest hurt?

  “Hundred and three. Why are you making me do math?”

  Ace nods.

  “Huh. That works on you too, bitchin”

  Oh, he was breathing really hard, no wonder his chest hurts.

  Calming down, he tries to push down the embarrassment he feels from freaking out like that.

  “What are you talking about?”

  Ace blinks, then brings a paw up to her chin to think.

  “Whenever I start freakin out, I like to crunch numbers until my brain realizes that it's… y'now, not supposed to freak out?”

  “...and that works?”

  “Worked fine for me. Saved my fnk-FUCK. Saved my ASS, a fuuuuuck load of times”

  Now that he's paying closer attention, he can see the stiffness in her body, the tension coiled up in her legs.

  She hates it here too.

  Right, she was in ‘that pce’ far longer than he was.

  Now that he thinks about it, he's never actually… talked to her about it, did he?

  “Um. Well, thank you”

  “Could reward me with a mating press” She says off rip.

  Oooookay, he's muting the stream for a bit.

  [MUTE STREAM? (ON/OFF)]

  [ON]

  “...please don't corrupt the Pokemon world with sex jokes”

  “Jokes?”

  Their eyes meet again, her smug expression repced with a neutral one.

  “Josh. Did you seriously think I was joking?”

  “I assumed so, yeah”

  She just stares, disbelief growing on her face as she lightly shakes her head.

  Joshua narrows his eyes.

  “Ace, you LITERALLY turned yourself into a Vaporeon for a bit”

  “I didn't choose Vaporeon only because of YOU, monkey boy”

  He doesn't believe that for a second. Ace rolls her eyes.

  “Ugh. Yeah. I admit, a big part of my decision was because of the meme. I wanted to be a quadruped, and the Big White One suggested I be a water type as some kinda… I dunno, exposure therapy? Also, Short Cake really liked fish, so… I picked this”

  She trails off a bit at the end, picking up a more mencholic tone of voice.

  A small part of him did wonder why Ace, whos world was flooded, would choose to be a Pokemon that was mostly water.

  “I think she would like the new look”

  She sniffs.

  “Thanks…”

  “...”

  “...”

  As they walk, Joshua speaks up again.

  “I… have to ask, why are you so…”

  She hikes an eyebrow.

  “Sexy? Irresistible? Ripe for dicking?”

  And the smugness is back.

  “I was gonna ask why you are so insistent on it. Every time we talk, you bring it up”

  Ace just chuckles.

  “Well you can thank your marefriend for that. I barely get to talk to you as is, only get time to throw in a quick jab before the window closes”

  “...what?”

  What does Jophiel have to do with this?

  “Not sure how you didn't notice, but she's been riding you HARD, glued to your hip. I can barely get a chance to talk to you, she either blocks me or gives me a death gre when I open my mouth”

  …really?

  (“I did not like how she looks at you…”)

  ‘So you completely cut her off?’

  (“I… don't know…”)

  Joshua genuinely wonders if fairy types are just this protective. They're, loving, emotionally accommodating, and vigorously loyal. But that closeness makes them prone to jealously and being protective of their trainer to other Pokemon.

  Was she doing it subconsciously?

  ‘And you didn't think to let me know?’

  He can feel a lot of things through the link. Shame, embarrassment, anger, even a bit of fear.

  (“I'm… I'm sorry…”) She chokes out.

  ‘Love…’

  She's being genuine. While she was undoubtedly upset at Ace's advances, she wasn't outright malicious towards her. But her protectiveness lead to the fish being isoted.

  “Eh, don't worry about it” Ace says, noticing his apologetic gaze.

  Sighing, he just drops or for now, even if he doesn't want to.

  “You didn't answer why you were so insistent on… it”

  Ace stops.

  “Josh”

  She stares at him.

  “I'm lonely”

  “...oh”

  She continues.

  “You are the first, genuine person I've spoken to in years. Short Cake was the st pony I've spoken to, and she died FIVE YEARS AGO. I don't know you that much, but you seem like an alright guy”

  “...thanks?”

  “So yeah. I was lonely, and stressed. I needed a distraction, so I resorted to shoving things inside me until the sad voices went away. And… it… kinda worked? At least until all the usual stuff got boring”

  “That's…”

  “Bad? Yeah, my dopamine receptors are FRIED. And that's kinda where you come in”

  Joshua takes a moment to look around.

  Still more trees, dang, they were flung quite a way, huh?

  “I saw you and noticed that the Big Alpaca in The Sky approved of you, I thought ‘hey, he might not be too bad!’. So… yeah”

  She shrugs, but her cheeks are slightly red.

  “It's kinda fucked up but I kinda just want… the attention? I guess? Like, I get to connect to someone after half a fucking decade WHILE getting my organs rearranged by some stud? Sign me the FUCK UP!”

  She giggles like it's a joke, but her tone shows she's more truthful than she probably expected.

  Joshua feels…

  “And when Arceus gave me the rundown, I thought ‘hey! He might like this form too! I might not be a good Pokemon but I'll at least have SOME use, right?’. I mean, I certainly don't mind just chilling and banging every so often, so… win-win, right?”

  …Pity.

  Ace may be notoriously horny, but that's only the result of a deeper, more fundamental issue. One that he was luckily, mostly spared of during his time in the Nightmare World…

  Ace keeps talking, like she's just talking for the sake of talking. Again he's reminded that this is the first real conversation she's had in the better part of six years.

  But at this point, he's made a decision.

  “-and I mean by that point I- WOAH!”

  Ace squeaks as Joshua snakes his arm under her and lifts her up.

  “Oohh~ Right here? Kinky mother fucker aren't you?”

  He doesn't say anything, he puts her to his chest, holding her still as he hugs her, tightly.

  Ace… is extremely touched-starved.

  And from the way she just starts hugging him back, he knows he’s not wrong.

  …

  “By the way, I didn't notice any fancy tech on you earlier, how'd you survive for so long?”

  Ace says, atop his shoulder.

  “I prayed”

  “You prayed” She repeated, then froze.

  “You… PRAYED?”

  “Yes. God helped me”

  “...and that worked?” The horny fish-dog asked, completely baffled.

  “Yup”

  “...”

  She looks at him.

  Then at the ground.

  Then at him again.

  Then straight ahead.

  “Fuck”

  Joshua ughs.

  “What about those golems?! What the fuck were those golems?!” She barks.

  “Four blocks of iron and a pumpkin”

  “A PUMPKIN?!” She shrieks.

  …

  He forgot to unmute himself.

  [WOOO SOUND IS BACK]

  [SSOOUUUNNNDDD]

  [What were you two talking about?]

  [Not any of our business… but im curious >:3]

  Before he can open his mouth, he hears something in the distance.

  “HEY! STOP THA-”

  *CCRRRAAASSHHH*

  “Why is there one HERE?!”

  “That bastard lied to us!”

  “DAMMIT!”

  A fight, with three voices in the distance.

  Multiple figures burst through the trees. Three rough looking women battered and bruised, with a lone Toxicroak fighting a white and green Pokemon. A Kirlia, a rather tall one at that.

  …why is there a Kirlia in the Obsidian Fields?

  Their eyes snap to him.

  “YOU!”

  Joshua goes to gesture to Cyndaquil, but stops. Cyndaquil has the disadvantage here, even if Toxicroak may not be a water type, he's still miles ahead of the newbie Pokemon.

  Instead, his eyes hover over to the Vaporeon on his shoulder.

  “...what?”

  “...”

  “You cannot be serious”

  Joshua reaches up and grabs her by the scruff.

  “Did you forget the st FIVE MINUTES?! I CAN'T FIGHT DUDE!”

  “Sorry… you're higher level…”

  “HOW?!”

  He doesn't know either, with a flick of his hand, and sends out his horny-fishdog.

  The bandit, which he now recognized, lifts up her hand as the two others stand beside her.

  “Toxicroak, let's douse this fool in poison!”

  “Ace, run their pockets”

  >BANDIT COIN CHALLENGES YOU TO A BATTLE<