Two months. Two months had passed, and there was no word of a tutor. No one who could, or rather would, teach me such a skill as to learn the fundamentals of sword use. The reasons were all the same. Sure, they may vary on paper, but it was no great secret what the true reason was. “We cannot teach such a skill to a lady.” “We cannot, for our courses are too busy.” “I cannot leave my homelands for so long.”

  The true reason, however, would always be clear. “We do not stoop to teach– weaponry, of all things– to savages.”

  “Another refusal?” I asked, my bottom lip retreating behind my teeth.

  “Damn ba–”

  “Language dear, your daughter is here.” She said, putting a hand over his. “I am here.”

  “Sorry dear.” He kissed her on the forehead, throwing the letters into the fireplace. “On to something else.”

  “So I won’t be getting a teacher?” I asked.

  It wasn’t new. In fact, it truly should have been expected. Had a few mere days in some other lands, treatment from only one crude individual, given me some expectation of proper treatment? The sting should not have been as strong as it was.

  “We’ll figure something out without these people, Nefret, we always do.”

  “Not always.” I mumbled.

  “We do.” The yellow of our cobra shone in his eyes, and I looked into my lap.

  “Sorry.”

  He sighed, pinching his temples. “No, no, you did nothing wrong. It’s these people that have upset me. They’ve upset you.”

  I shook my head. “They don’t upset me.”

  “No need to lie,” he said. “Not here.”

  “Has there been news of my engagement?” I asked instead.

  He didn’t answer.

  I closed my eyes, forcing myself not to cry. It should have come shortly after our arrival. I did not like the look in my father’s eyes, even if the anger was not directed at me.

  “I’m not upset Father.”

  I could not cry again. I would not. I refused.

  “Princess, that savage boy is nothing to be distressed over.” Ai said, feeding me raisins, but they could hardly be tasted.

  “Please do not call him such a thing,” I said. “I do detest that word.”

  “I apologize,” she bowed her head.

  Savages. Like they could call us such a thing while condoning the treatment of other humans as animals. Between us, I found them much more savage like, but viewing them as such could lead to future wrongs, so it was best to let go of the matter. Most people truly involved would be dead and gone before my children ever saw the light of the world, so they would hardly matter.

  It was a burden I could bear, and then take with me to the end. I did not even have to carry it alone. It was certainly a lighter load than my father’s– yet it was still so heavy.

  I missed my brothers. They always made it lighter, but they were across the lands.

  “Your Mother and Father will find something,” she said. “Or perhaps someone from Lechia.”

  “We can’t have Mother’s homeland do everything for us,” I said. “That will only make things worse. You hear what they say.”

  This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

  “Running their mouths like rivers that lead nowhere.” She said.

  “Their rivers run further than ours do, Ai.” It was simply how it was.

  “Yours will run much further,” she said, but she always said such things. She could see no flaws in me. It would mean more coming from someone who did. “Besides, you have no need for a sword, or training to use one.”

  “But I want to.” I said.

  “That Beastly Prince put that idea in your mind!” She insisted. “You had no such inclinations before.”

  “I had not even the slightest idea that I could be inclined toward such a thing.” I said.

  “I’m only concerned Princess, please don’t be angry toward me,” she said. “You haven’t been the same since our voyage, and have been doing things quite unlike yourself. Even speaking to that boy is something you would never have done before.”

  “Things were not as dire before.”

  “They are not dire now!” She said.

  “Boys and girls alike have had their engagements settled by this age,” I said. “Even by birth oftentimes. It’s an important matter even before the marriage itself. My brothers can afford to wait, but I have no such timeframe.”

  She sighed. “These matters of marriage are unfair to you.”

  “They’ll become more favorable as we build ourselves,” I said. “And my great-granddaughters could afford to wait as long as they would like, as my mother did, and will have to deal with no such unfairness.”

  “You could do the same.”

  I shook my head. “It would be selfish of me. If you are to dedicate your life to serve me, I must do the same for you.”

  “You can dedicate yourself in other ways,” she said.

  “Those other ways won’t make as much of a difference,” I said. “Besides, to marry someone tolerable enough is not so terrible.”

  “There’s nothing tolerable about that boy.”

  “He’s my age, at the very least.”

  “That is a very low standard.”

  “Amongst the children of slaves,” I said. “But not so in nobility.”

  It was strange to live in the world of the in between, where both worlds, so completely

  opposite, could both be so completely backwards. I much preferred this little space we had in the middle, but in order to keep it, I would have to leave.

  “I think I should like to read something,” I said, moving the matter to something else. It did no good to let her worry.

  “Oh, very well,” she said. “I’ll bring you something you like.”

  “Thank you, yes.”

  I waited on my bed, simply sitting there with thoughts I had no desire to sit with. It wasn’t as if I had not thought about my actions. Even if it was driven by some level of desperation, I truly did prefer him over those that were here. Yes, he was certainly brutish, but he was not a liar by nature. He did not feign smiles. He said his insults to my face, rather than behind my back. He was quite transparent.

  So maybe some of what the transparency allowed for me to see was less than pleasant, but at least it was visible. The aggression and such could be tamed at this age, and with his treatment by others within his palace, it may even yield positive results.

  There was also another matter– one I found far more shameful to admit, and so haven’t

  out loud, but it was true nonetheless.

  I found something about his improper fire to be inspiring.

  My hands covered my face as the thought properly formed itself for the first time. It was

  certainly not something I could say aloud, but it was true. There was a charm, not in him himself, but in the wildness about him. The confidence with which I could say that he did not care. Not merely a facade of pretending not to for pride, but a true lack of care for the glares, or even the people giving them.

  Even when the adults looked on him with disdain he felt no need to shrink under them. That much, at least, could be considered respectable.

  I found it admirable.

  He himself might not even have had a teacher insofar as his skills with his sword went. It was quite possible he had to do most everything by himself. That would be the only reasonable excuse for his behavior during said discussions.

  If he could do it himself, there was no reason why I could not.

  I uncovered my face, filled with a new found resolve. It could not be too difficult to learn the most basic parts of swordsmanship. There were books on the matter. Depictions of proper forms and the like.

  The scrolls were dropped onto my bed, of the story of the prince who had been lifted out of the depths of a sinkhole by the Cobra, after entering a covenant. A covenant our people were still tied to this day. It was, and would always be, my favorite story, but I no longer could read it, as I had other things to do.

  “Not now Ai!” I said, handing the thing back. “I have a new endeavor to busy myself with.”

  The papers were put back down.

  “Ai.” I huffed. “I’m serious.”

  “I’m sure you are Princess,” a voice that was most definitely not Ai’s said from the bedside. I looked up, my smile forming at the sight of someone whose ability to make all things better fell only beneath my parents and brothers.

  “Khu!”