Narrator-kun:

  The competition continues as advertised. Countless would-be Saintesses fight for supremacy over the hero’s clout yet they are not nearly as exciting as the first wave of premium contestants. While this unfolds, the corrupting influence of androgynous pop culture continues to fester, developing its grand master plan at a rapid pace. Alphonso-sama is finally getting a shot at the big time, and “it?” will not waste it.

  Yes, this may seem confusing—but remember my friends: That confusion and dissonance is what makes Alphonso attractive. Alphonso can be anything you want “it?” to be. You just have to open yourself up to new… decadent… experiences.

  Shiverrrrrr…

  Hajime: “Ahhhh, that was such a good episode!”

  Valiant: “I liked the dresses Hero-kun. The white and pink highlights really gave them an innocent yet cute appearance.”

  Hajime: “I know right?!”

  Hajime smiles—but the feeling fades quickly. The emptiness lingers and he stops smiling after a few minutes.

  Valiant: “Is something the matter?”

  Hajime: “You know… if this is a true isekai, then it’s inevitable I’d be depressed.”

  Valiant: “Why would you be depressed, hero? There’s so much opportunity here, shouldn’t you be excited?”

  Hajime: “The sense of adventure makes for a great distraction GPS-san. Any excess of emotion will work the same way for me.”

  Valiant: “Excess of emotion? You seem to be a pretty mellow hero.”

  Hajime: “Naturally, I may seem mellow but I consider myself a little unhinged—but that’s an escape from what really bothers me.”

  Valiant: “Then what truly bothers you, hero?”

  Hajime sighs.

  Hajime: “I’ll never see my family again. Mom, Dad, Haruka, and… never mind.”

  Valiant remains silent for a few seconds.

  Valiant: “Why don’t you talk about them for a bit? Accepting those feelings might help you face what’s coming.”

  Hajime: “Sure… there’s no reason not to try.”

  Even Whalescalibur, who had been chatting nonstop into the void, falls silent.

  “My mom’s name is Erika. She was a teacher in her youth but retired after speaking her mind to a shitty faculty.”

  Valiant: “That’s a very specific way to retire…”

  Hajime: “She escaped city life and worked the fields of her old family estate.”

  Valiant: “So her family was well established?”

  Hajime: “They were in the past, but government taxation, regulations, and loans stripped them of most of their land.”

  Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  Valiant: “So she struggled?”

  Hajime: “Not really. She was a looker with a fiery attitude. The locals bought from her readily—she was the only decent slice of pie in that part of the country.”

  Valiant: “……”

  Hajime: “Anyway, she met my dad through sales.”

  Valiant: “How romantic.”

  Hajime: “It wasn’t. My dad was a nasty piece of work—but Mom loved the challenge.”

  Valiant: “That’s… different.”

  Hajime: “My dad’s name is Haruto. He was a trader from a distant continent, scouting land with his best friend Amano.”

  Valiant: “That doesn’t bode well.”

  Hajime: “At first it didn’t. He haggled over every price, and Mom raised them out of spite.”

  Valiant: “Still doesn’t explain the marriage.”

  Hajime: “That’s how love is. They hated each other until something changed. Mom said it was the happiest decision she ever made. Dad said it was a well fought fight and he felt satisfied.”

  Valiant: " What about Haruka?”

  At that moment, another sword quietly listens in—a sleepy one suddenly became wide awake.

  Hajime: “Amano went through with the land grab plan and opened a real-estate firm. He married a kind woman and had a beautiful daughter. Then they died in a unfortunate car accident. Dad thought it was unfair for their child and brought her home.”

  “They adopted Haruka and she became my step-sister.”

  Valiant: “How do you feel about her?”

  Hajime: “I don’t know. When we were young, I loved her as a brother should—spoiling and guiding her. Somewhere along the way, I failed.”

  Valiant: “You? You seem competent.”

  Hajime: “You can’t really control others and their own personal developments as people. Haruka internalized an unhealthy attachment to me somewhere along the line.”

  Valiant: “How unhealthy?”

  Hajime: “Purging any girl who looked at me kindly.”

  Valiant: “What did you do?”

  Hajime: “Excuse you! I’m not at fault!, I noticed something was strange about her and decided to just read her diary to know about her change. After reading it, I came to the logical conclusion that I didn’t want an early grave and I left for the city!”

  Valiant: “Wasn’t that a bit drastic?”

  Hajime: “You don’t know what Haruka is, she is different.”

  Valiant: “Different how?”

  Hajime: “The world loves her.”

  Valiant: “That’s really vague.”

  Hajime: “She’s too competent, her luck is unreal. Behind her smile is malice toward anyone who even looks at me with kindness.”

  Valiant: “So… she’s in love?”

  Hajime: “Hush! Don’t say those cursed words! She’s my sister!”

  Valiant: “Step-sister.”

  Hajime: “I practically raised her!”

  Valiant: “So you ran away from a loving family because you didn’t want to marry your obsessive step-sister?”

  Hajime: “Obsessively evil step-sister, that I raised like a daughter.”

  Valiant: “If she’s evil, doesn’t that make you evil too?”

  Hajime: “I probably am. She got it from my side of the family…”

  Valiant:" You know that you and her are not step siblings right?"

  Hajime:" Hush now.... if i give in to other definitions it opens up the window for misunderstandings"

  Valiant:" She's just you're adopted sibling!!! She can MARRY!!!"

  Hajime makes a cross to ward of the devil, fuck definitions hes not crossing that line!

  They continue chatting as Valiant distracts Hajime from his fear of heights.

  Lackey: “Alphonso-sama, the band is ready! Shall we prepare the grand entrance?”

  Alphonso slaps him with a rose.

  Alphonso: “No, my pretty. We are the beginning and the end of this venue. Let the hype reach its peak.”

  Lackey: “You’re exactly right, Alphonso-sama! Could you sign my strap-on?”

  Alphonso places a blue autographed sticker on it.

  Alphonso:

  “Hero… you humiliated my model in Bazonka Conquest, but can you handle the real thing?”

  “It” squirms with excitement.

  The elevator screams mechanically as corrupting miasma floods its systems.

  Caladblock: “How can you be so resistant to my power?! What are you?!”

  Elevator:

  “Foul thing. I tolerated your presence only because of Deus-sama. I will not let you ride me without a fight!”

  Caladblock: “I knew you were evil! Hajime will praise me when I vanquish you!”

  And so, the holy sword faces her greatest enemy yet…

  Good news, everyone!