“(Why am I feeling like this?)”

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  I can’t understand why I am feeling like this at all… He just told me to stand behind him and yet, my heart beat rapidly increased for reasons that I cannot comprehend or even know fathom to understand them. I simply can’t… I-I’ve never felt like this before, how can I understand or comprehend anything in this state? It’s not like I’ve been alive for long but, I should already have at the very least the basic knowledge of human emotions after all, I can feel and express them. Yet… Even with my mask hiding my eyes, I still felt them widen wide because of this. There’s no logic to it as I didn’t do it out of conscience but somehow, they still moved on their own. On their own? Why do I feel that they were forced to do so and I even felt my mouth doing the same... All because of how he sounded when he spoke to me... How he looked at me… I could feel the assertiveness but also the unreasonable worry towards me, someone that could dispose of these Shadows in an instant and without even breaking a sweat.

  “(He knows this, doesn’t he? He must know as otherwise; he wouldn’t have acted cautions towards me the first time we met. But then... Why does he worry so much? What did it change?)”

  I can’t understand…

  The girl looks down towards the shiny floor, lost in thought as her mind tries to wrap around the reasons for why this phenomenon is happening. Though, she’s mainly confused, unsure why she’s feeling the way she is and why he’s acting in such a manner. Why were those simple words from the Hero this “effective” to her, why are they making her heart race with each passing thought of hers, ones that are focused in said sentence unable to escape the grasp of it. It wasn’t only what he said. It wasn’t only what he meant either. Indeed, it was his genuine care and concern for her well-being that is making her mind confused to what her heart is feeling, what her mind is receiving from her heart. She’s feeling “warm” sensations throughout her whole body, primarily on her face, making her cheeks gain a gentle shade of red to them while her nose and ears suffer the same fate, all because of what her disarrayed heart is portraying to her body.

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  Even though the Hero is fighting a couple of Defects, she still has yet to make a single move, seemingly to the world that she does not care of what’s currently happening at all. The battle itself, if one can even call it that, it’s not chaotic, or at least not on a grand scale that will forcefully make her part of it; however, thanks to the small space they are in, said “action” will indeed be realized. A few Defects have taken notice of the Hero, running up to him with devious intentions, ones that they will never be able to make it true or accomplish as they simply are far too weak compared to him to be able to do. Though, she has noticed this after all, he sure is making quite the commotion as he understands that she’s potentially the target of those despicable beings.

  “(He’s shouting… Isn’t he?)”

  Fire noises!

  “(Ah, his magic energy is also increasing rapidly… There’s no need for such but...)”

  I still can’t make a single move.

  I don’t understand why, but my body refuses to move. Is it because I know that those Shadows can’t harm me? That must be the reason. I think? Maybe it’s because I know he will take care of them before they even come closer to me? Do I trust him so much or… Is it my wistfulness making me do so? No, that can’t be it, he’s currently about to use a spell, one that I have no clue what it is but, from what I’m sensing it is a Pyro spell, several times stronger than the Shadows. I doubt they will even be able to react to the speed of the spell, let alone be able to defend themselves against it. Maybe this might really be the reason why my body refuses to move a single muscle.

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  Maybe?

  I hear a few explosions once the spell hit the Shadows or more so, the arrows of it as it gained said shape the very moment they were expelled from the magic circles. I shouldn’t be this shocked at what he did, while my knowledge might be focused on black magic. He’s the Hero, he should know several types of spells and yet… Somehow I can’t stop feeling in such an odd way. The first time that he was in this Bubble Universe he used at least three different elements but with the sword of his, that increased to four. I wonder, how many spells does he actually know? What is his strongest spell? What type of element he has the most affinity for? It should be light magic, no? He’s the Hero and the weakness of black magic is light magic, something that the Demon Lord has the tendency to be quite proficient at, so it would make sense. There’s so much more that I want to know about him.

  But…Why?

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  Ah, it’s beating faster yet again… And here I thought I was slowly calming it down by thinking of something else. I truly want to know more about him and the more I think about it, the more my heart races and my desire for such grows even… Why? Why do I want to know what type of foods he likes? What is his favourite colour? What does he do in his free time? Why did he become the Hero? Was he forced by the gods? Or did he accept it willingly? But, if that is the case then, why? Why does he feel the need to save Kiana, even though he does not know her at all? Is it because he’s the Hero or… because that is who he is? I want to know him better, what he likes, what he does not like, what it bothers him, what does not bother him.

  But…

  But!

  But!!!

  Why do I want to know all of this?

  “Hey, Miranda, are you ok? I kind of went a little overboard…”

  “Ye-Yes, I’m ok… Don’t worry about it.”

  That was such a simple question from him and yet, I could barely answer it. Why did my voice quiet down at the end? Why did I stutter at the beginning? I’m feeling so hot but, it’s much more so on my face… I feel like my cheeks are burning from how hot they have become, however, the tip of my nose for some reason seems to be suffering the same if not even more. Ah no, I can’t look at him, at his face. Is he… looking at me though? Why do I want that? I can sense him looking directly at me but, since I have faced my face sideways, that might be the reason for such and not something else. Is he confused about what I’m doing? If I am beyond clueless to what’s happening to me then, I can only imagine what’s going through his head and what he might be thinking of me. He stays quiet for a few short seconds however, I noticed that he wants to keep going but he seems to be hesitant in doing so.

  Is it because of what I’m doing? Am I troubling him?

  “Uhm, can I ask a question?”

  “Hmm, hmm.”

  Now I can’t even speak let alone properly, only allowing for a humming to be formed. I feel like if I open my mouth my heart will jump from it, speaking nonsense once it does so, all directed at him, the main culprit for me shutting my mouth tightly. I want to ask him all of those questions, I want to see him, how he looks, how he feels like to touch… I know that I’m not normal, while I’m not a monster but I’m not a human either. I was constructed by my Empress and “her” however, I also have something extremely influential inside of me, something that allowed me to exist. Allowed me to have a soul, reason, thoughts, feelings… All of what I can feel, my independent thoughts and desires, all of them are possible because of it. Can he sense that? Can he sense the core inside of me? I have no clue but, why am I worrying about that now? What if he knows about it? What is the problem? Am I… afraid that he might look at me differently if he knows that I’m a freak? Wait, a freak? Why am I now thinking like that? He already knows that I was constructed by my Empress. I told him the first time we met but at that time, I didn’t care about it. And now, I’m feeling like this. Argh! I simply cannot understand these thoughts of mine…

  The girl gently brings both of her hands towards her chest, slowly resting on top of it as she cannot fathom what her heart is asking her mind, let alone what he’s feeling.

  Although, that will change quickly.