I wake… for the first time in what feels like forever. Although I can’t remember a time when I was awake before. I stand up, seeing the carcass of a dying fire glow softly in front of me. Why can’t I remember where I am? Or who I am? Every thought I have here, feels slow. Almost like dragging a stick through sludge.

  My eyes start to sting at the light from the dying fire, so I turn and start to walk towards the trees. It infuriates me that I know what a fire is, what trees are, yet whenever I turn my memory to myself it is simply blank. I walk for a while before my legs start to wobble, so I sit at the foot of the nearest tree. I close my eyes and try to think of anything from my past, and I can recall nothing. Until suddenly I get an impression of something…

  Feeling so, so there was such violence, such brutality and I remember blood… and screams. But then it is gone, and I am left empty again, like a blank slate. I try to think of that anger, do I feel anything else?

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  The rush of emotion that accompanies trying to access my feelings, floors me. If I wasn’t sat already, I’m sure I would have collapsed under the wait of it. The immense rage is their, ever burning, but the other two dwarf it in scale completely. I feel such sadness, such loss and sorrow. It almost feels impossible for it to exist on such a scale. How could someone suffer so much loss without everything that exists disappearing?

  The final emotion eclipses even the sorrow I feel, it is a mind shattering, heart numbing loneliness. It feels like I have been alone forever, despite having no memory of anything connected to this. I simply long for connection, yearn for it, yet am constantly denied.

  I can feel the sorrow and the loneliness turn back on themselves within my very being and become fuel for my rage. I shake with rage and sob with sorrow as my emotions threaten to wipe me away. I cannot take anymore of this, I will the world to end this suffering but nothing responds. Nothing ever responds. I simply sit there in silence, shaking with my suffering, until consciousness slips from me and I know no more…