The carriage grinded to a halt. Kip looked out at the line of servants. He turned to the crew he was with, “Let’s… all be on our best behaviors. Okay?”

  Everyone stared uncomfortably. They shared glances with each other and stole glances from Akun. Akun nodded his head, smiling, “Yeah. Let’s have some fun, huh? I’m ready to have some fun!”

  He grabbed Tamas by the horn and pulled him up, “Right, tubby?”

  “Ahh.”

  There was a knock on the cabin door. Jasssper wrapped his tail around the door handle and opened it. They were greeted by a portly man, old, with a balding head and permanent rosy cheeks.

  “Evening.”

  “Evening!”

  “It’s a pleasure to welcome the Lord of Shangra to our humble abode. You really are smaller than they say. Come in. Come in.”

  “Thank you!” Said Kip, “Everybody, step outside.” he said it nervously, not sure if anyone was going to comply. Akun rubbed Tamas’ head and was the first to step out.

  “Nice to meet ya!” He stuck his hand out. The man stared at it and shook his leathered glove, “Names Akun.”

  “Akun,” Said the rosy cheeked man, “I am Danver. Danver of Riverwatch. Akun, is that… Kashuvian?”

  “It’s Pit Fiend. Fiendish for ‘Peacekeeper.’” He slapped Danver’s shoulder too hard as he walked by him.

  Jasssper bowed his head gracefully as he dismounted, and offered his tail to Lala. Lala thanked him and lowered herself.

  “My, an elf!” Said Danver, “Where did you pick one of those up?” He asked Kip.

  “Oh, haha,” grimaced Kip, “She comes with the castle.”

  He nodded, “I am Danver as mentioned, Danver of Riverwatch. I am one of the King’s most trusted advisors. And I imagine that the correspondence I’ve had was with you, Jasper?”

  “Jasssper,” Corrected Kip.

  “What?” Asked Danver.

  “Jasssper,” Said Lala.

  “It’sss quite alright.”

  “What? You’re supposed to say it like a snake? Are you joking?”

  “Ignore it, whatever name you can pronouncccce iss fine by me.”

  “Jasper. You’re the king’s council?” Danver asked.

  “Yesss,” Said Jasssper, “Pleasssed to finally meet you.”

  “Stormbristle is also my council,” Kip said.

  Storm floated out of the carriage, “How do you do!”

  “An enchanted storm boar! My my, you lot are quite interesting. And a faun!”

  “A satyr,” said Tamas as he grabbed his head and outstretched his hand, “How do you do?”

  “Quite well. So, I suppose you should be meeting the king soon. He is, unfortunately, indisposed.”

  “Madam, I don’t believe I caught your name?”

  “Lala, charmed.”

  “Right. So… Tamas, Stormbristle, Jasper, Akun, Lala. And of course… the lord himself, Lord Kip. I bow to you, sir.” He bowed deeply, and Kip could see the rosacea on his scalp.

  “No need, really. We do not do that sort of thing.”

  “Why, I should hope your subjects offer you the same respect.”

  “To us, the role of the dark lord, it is a custodial role. I appreciate the bow, but a handshake will do all the same.”

  “Oh, right.” Said Danver, “Yours was not chosen by the gods. It was… won in a wager.”

  Kip, Jasssper, and Storm all exchanged a microscopic glance.

  “Not quite,” Storm said, “He has won …. But he was chosen by the dark lord himself to be the ruler of Shangra.”

  The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

  “Chosen by the devil himself. Then a bow is most appropriate,” He gave another bow, this time lower than before.

  Kip waved his hand, embarrassed, “Please… no need.”

  Danver stuck his head back up.

  “So, shall we be off to see the king?” Kip asked.

  “Yeah!” Said Akun, “When are we meeting the big guy? Surely he would be here to meet with your big guy?”

  “He desperately wanted to. I assure you,” Said the advisor, “But as it stands, he will be indisposed until dinner. Until then, he has entrusted to me the duty of your care, and I take it most seriously. I hope that will suffice.”

  “So… no king?” Asked Akun.

  “No, but we have set up a series of games at the Altar for your entertainment.”

  “What Altar?”

  “Oh, of course. You’ve never been to the capital of Ulmund. It is the name of Budder’s coliseum. Affectionately known as the Altar. Shall we away?”

  “Away… yes. Sounds fun! We shall… away.”

  “Wondrous!” Said Danver of Riverwatch, “Let us away!”

  Danver took them down the row of bowing servants.

  Danver walked them to the Altar. It was a large amphitheater dug into the ground. The skybox that Kip and his crew were in gave them a view of the crowd. The masses were like a speckled wallpaper that surrounded The Altar. The population seated likely rivaled half of Shangra’s entire population.

  The first game was two knights jousting for their amusement. Each had a different mount. One rode on a champing maw and the other was riding high-snooted slorse. Each mount behaved differently and the game was accompanied with nonlethal magic. The two knights crashed against each other, one narrowly avoiding the other and the high-snooted slorse used its thorned tentacles to wrap around the other knight’s champing maw, who of course used their many teeth to fight back. The knight raised his hand and cast a projectile spell, hoping to knock his opponent off.

  Kip watched in horror as the champing maw got the best of the other mount, their jaw unhinging and fitting the entire leg into their mouth. Akun had a glint in his eye the whole time.

  He turned to Danver, “So… how often do you have knights and exotic mounts partake in this… fun game?”

  “About once a week. It’s important that the king stays entertained. A happy king means happy subjects and vice versa! We have many more games to show you! As you can see, the kingdom has much love for games.”

  Once the mount was fully ingested, the knight who won took their bow. The audience cheered as the knight stuck up their hand and cast fireworks into the sky.

  “Who is that?” Lala asked.

  “That’s Ironwood. Powerful knight. Never takes their helmet off, even in the presence of the king! Boorish, but the audience loves them.”

  Ironwood took their champing maw and led them away. Groundskeepers came out and set up the next game. They set up bars and wooden crates, creating a playground of sorts.

  “I know your kind likes hide and seek, this is a different sort of game.” Said Danver.

  “What?” Asked Jasssper.

  Storm glanced at Lala. She could read his glance and started making small talk with Danver. Kip took a subtle step away. Storm leaned in to talk to him.

  “Our ‘kind’ does not ‘love’ hide and seek,’ Said Stormbristle, “I, in particular, hate it. You and Zeke like it and this all but confirms that they got their info from the spies sent.”

  Akun leaned in, “What are you guys talking about?”

  “Do we talk about it with them?” Asked Kip, “Hey, we killed your spies, sorry about that? My bad?”

  “My bad what?” Akun asked.

  “Akun,” Said Storm, “Could you nab us some snacks? I am parched.”

  “Tell me what you’re talking about first.”

  “Private,” hissed Jasssper.

  “You guys can tell me.”

  “Ahem,” Danver spoke up, “The game is called ‘The floor is lava,’ an invention of ours. The rules are simple: if you touch the floor, you die.”

  “Ah,” Kip said, “Our children have a similar game.”

  “Really?” Danver asked, “You play with children? We are not so cruel.” Danver turned, the orange glow on his face drowned out the red of his cheeks as the lava filled the coliseum.

  The players were all released, and they attempted to navigate through the course in groups of threes. Kip flinched as he watched a sprite fall in, her wings weighed down by the heat and her tiny arm stuck up as she sunk into the lava.

  Kip shivered and looked away. Danver’s face was one of captivation. The first team won, if only by default. The other team had all fallen into the lava.

  The lava did not sink away after the game, instead, the platform raised. The groundskeepers came out again and cleared the remaining metal obstacles. Ironwood once again appeared, beckoning the audience’ cheers. They had to face an ogre twice their size with a sword.

  “The final game,” Danver said, “Is a one on one match. We do love our sport here. What’s wrong, Dark Lord? Don’t tell me a monster finds this all quite cruel? Oh, the irony in that.”

  “I understand,” Said Kip, “There are different cultures. We handle things with fighting too, but… it’s still hard for me to watch needless death.”

  “Needless? Why, dark lord, look out at the crowd. Hear their chanting. Their rallying. That is not needless. The populace is satiated. A happy subject means a happy king and vice versa.”

  “That’s a mighty big ogre though,” Said Kip.

  “And a mighty small knight,” finished Storm.

  The ogre charged at Ironwood with their club. The club was a freshly uprooted tree being held from the roots. It smashed down on Ironwood, who rolled out of the way. They stuck their hand up and cast a projectile spell. Flashes of white slapped against the ogre. The beast stuck his hand up. Just then, Ironwood was in his blindspot. The knight lurched up, several feet into the air and stabbed their sword into the ogre’s hand. The ogre cried out in pain. He took his bludgeon and slammed it into his palm. While Ironwood was no longer there, the blade remained.

  When the bludgeon struck the palm, it stuck the blade even farther inside the ogre. Ironwood had run up the arm and made it to the shoulder of the ogre. Ironwood reeled their arm back, cast fiery palm and jabbed their hand into the ogre’s ear. The fire penetrated the orifice of the ogre, and the fire came out of all the other holes. Fire ejected from the ogre’s nostrils and ear. Their eyes glowed orange. The ogre’s eyes rolled back and fell down. Ironwood leapt off and landed on their feet. They approached the ogre, now dead, and pulled the sword from the palm. Ironwood stuck their hand up and the crowd went wild.

  “Our best performer,” Said Danver, “Now… off to see the king.”

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