Devin almost screamed when the pain in his guts flared up. For a few minutes, all he could do was hang on and try to breathe. Finally, it faded enough for him to talk.

  “I’m not going to make it,” he said.

  “Nonsense,” the dog said. He trotted ahead of the mule with the reins in his mouth. “You need to access a more positive attitude.”

  “Positive attitude,” Devin said. “Right. I’ve been teleported into a world with killer trees, crazy farmers, and talking dogs, and I’ve got a hole in my stomach the size of a cantaloupe. There’s absolutely no reason to have a positive attitude.”

  “If it makes you feel better, you’re not in immediate danger of dying,” the dog said. “Infection won’t set in for days, and while Tree Rot is incredibly painful, it won’t be fatal as long as you reach the healer in time.”

  “If this is supposed to be an inspirational speech, it sucks,” Devin said. “What’s your name anyway, dog?”

  “I’m Milo. But I’m not actually a dog. I’m a cat. I’m just taking the shape of a dog to avoid attention.”

  “Of course. A talking cat taking in shape of a dog. How did I not guess that?”

  “I sense a certain amount of sarcasm in your tone,” Milo said. “I’m not sure it’s appropriate for the situation.”

  Devin’s head swam. He buried his face in the mule’s neck. “Appropriate?” he said in a muffled voice. “It’s not like there’s a chapter for bleeding to death on a mule in the etiquette manual. I just want to die so I can wake up from this stupid nightmare.”

  “You’re not going to wake up,” Milo said. “This is your life now.”

  “No, it’s not. I must have had a stroke or something, and now I’m in a coma.”

  “If you really think that, why did you bother getting on the mule?”

  Devin groaned but didn’t answer. He rode in silence for a bit.

  “So, if it’s not a coma, what is this?” he said.

  “What do you think it is?” Milo said.

  Devin thought about it. Nothing made sense, except …

  “Is this like one of those books where people are teleported into a game world and have to survive?” he said.

  It was a few seconds before Milo answered. “Honestly, that’s closer than I thought you’d get.”

  “That explains the text in my brain,” Devin said.

  “Updates,” Milo said. “Your default interface is set for haptic and text-based alerts. They aren’t really text, of course, but that’s how your brain interprets them.” He paused. “This isn’t a game, though. This is all real. You need to come to terms with that right away or you won’t make it.”

  Devin groaned. Part of him wanted to roll off the mule and let it trample him to end whatever this insanity was, but the pain stopped him. Maybe it wasn’t real, but that didn’t mean he wanted to make it worse.

  “Tell me about these updates,” he said.

  “I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific,” Milo said.

  “What are you, a customer support bot?”

  The dog raised its nose to the air and sped up, pulling the mule faster.

  “Milo?” Devin said.

  Milo ignored him. Devin called him a few more times, then he gave up.

  “I guess I’ll figure it out myself,” he said. “Hey, um, interface ... can I see the updates again?”

  He felt like an idiot, but it worked. Letters popped up across his line of vision. He started to focus on one, then paused. They were mostly capital A’s, but there were a few other symbols.

  “Show me all of the A’s,” he said.

  Text filled his vision.

  Achievement Unlocked! Doctor Do Little – You got some good advice from a talking animal – and you were smart enough to listen.

  Reward: 2 Universal Knowledge shards.

  Achievement Unlocked! Ignore the Roar – You resisted a sonic roar attack intended to paralyze you, deafen you, knock you down, knock you out, or all of the above.

  Reward: 1 Fundamental Forces shard.

  Achievement Unlocked! Animal Cruelty – An animal sacrificed itself so that you might live. Do better.

  If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

  Reward: 1 Life shard.

  Achievement Unlocked! Dog’s Best Friend – You saved the family belonging to Milo, the talking dog. Well, he claims to be a cat, but he looks like a dog to me, so let’s stick with that for now.

  Reward: 2 Universal Knowledge shards.

  Achievement Unlocked! Turn the Other Cheek – Lee’s brother tried to kill you, but you kept your promise and didn’t hurt him. It may not have been the smartest move, but at least you’re one of the good guys.

  Reward: 1 Life shard.

  “Go away,” he said. Everything disappeared.

  He experimented with thinking the commands instead of saying them out loud. It took a few minutes to get it right. He had to think in a certain way that he couldn’t put into words. It was sort of like trying to understand how he moved his arm. Soon he was flipping through windows without too much trouble.

  He wondered if there was a main menu, and when he did, the representation of a notebook appeared to fill up a quarter of his vision. The words ‘Character Sheet’ were scrawled across the front in Devin’s own handwriting. A line of tabs ran down the side. Tabs labeled ‘Achievements’, ‘Advancement,’ ‘Attributes’, ‘Boosts’ and ‘Crystals’, glowed softly.

  He opened the ‘Attributes’ tab. Twelve Attributes were listed, six marked as ‘mental’ and six as ‘physical.’ Some, like Might and Agility, were familiar from games, while others, like Concentration and Logic, were new to him. They were further divided into six ‘Primary’ and six ‘Secondary’ Attributes. Four of Devin’s six ‘Primary’ Attributes were physical, which made sense if he was a fighter-type class. His Primary Attributes were all in the 50s and his Secondary in the low 30s.

  Despite his wretched condition, Devin felt a surge of interest. He’d always been one of those nerds who loved learning new gaming systems and rules. Giving him a character sheet was like handing backstage passes to a Swifty.

  “Milo,” he said. He opened his eyes, then closed them again when the dizziness got worse.

  “What do you want?” Milo said. He sounded … offended? He couldn’t still be mad about the customer support remark, could he?

  “These are my actual stats?”

  “Yes.”

  “So, what … I’m in a game?” Devin said.

  “I already told you this is no game,” Milo said.

  “Then why do I have a character sheet?” Devin said.

  “It was determined to be the most familiar way to present the information to you,” Milo said. “Perhaps that was a mistake, but your lifelong interest in tabletop and video games provided an opportunity to hasten and encourage your transition to Senarci.” He sniffed. “It’s the same reason I’ve taken the initial form of a dog. Your history shows that you are a … ‘dog person.’”

  Milo’s tone suggested that was somewhere between mass murderer and IRS agent.

  “I like cats,” Devin said. “I’m just allergic to them.”

  “Well, not anymore,” Milo said. “Such minor ailments disappear with enhancement. You have a chance to redeem yourself.”

  “I …” Devin shook his head since he couldn’t think of a more pointless thing to talk about right now. “How many tabs are there? I see an arrow at the bottom for a new page.”

  “There are as many tabs as you need. Keep in mind this interface hasn’t been personalized to you yet. It’s a thousand times more advanced than anything you’ve ever dreamed of. You could spend years personalizing it. Fortunately for you, that’s unnecessary. It will adjust the settings based on your choices. Eventually, it will become what …”

  “I get it,” Devin said. “The AI learns, like autocorrect on a smartphone. Can you be quiet for a few minutes? I need to think.”

  Milo gave a loud sniff. Devin closed his eyes. There was no way any of this was real. He’d had a stroke or a car accident and was in the middle of some coma dream. The pain must be from his injuries. He should ignore all this insanity and concentrate on waking up.

  He spent ten minutes trying to wake up - or at least change his dream. All he got was a headache to go along with the pain in his stomach. He gave up and returned to studying his character sheet. None of this was real, that was obvious – but why not enjoy it while he could?

  “What level am I?” Devin said.

  “Silver,” Milo said.

  “I assume that’s the lowest.”

  “Copper is the lowest, then Silver. They’re the two basic levels. You were able to skip Copper altogether.”

  “How did I pull that off?” Devin said.

  “That falls under the category of things I can’t tell you,” Milo said.

  “All right. What’s my next enhancement level, and how long is it going to take me to get there?”

  “Gold, and you’re a long way from there. You need to max out each of your Attributes by using your abilities. You'll max a lot of them out by fighting, but you may find you have to do other things to get all of them.”

  Devin scanned his Attributes. Sure enough, there was a maximum number next to each. The Primary Attributes maximums were 150 and the Secondary were 105. But …

  “Why are there two different numbers for each Attribute?” he said. “Wait. I get it. The larger number includes bonuses and stuff, right?”

  “Correct,” Milo said. “The smaller number is your base Attribute, not including bonuses. Those are the ones you must max out to level.”

  Devin switched over to the ‘Abilities’ tab. Each ability had between 1 and 4 Attributes listed next to it.

  He checked to see which ones were highest. There were two that were tied.

  Melee, Knife – (Deftness and Reaction) - 33

  Melee, Short Sword – (Agility, Might and Reaction) – 33

  Devin frowned. Something didn’t add up.

  “I seems like the abilities are supposed to be an average of all the Attributes, but they’re only about half of them,” he said.

  “It’s an average of what’s called the ‘modifier,’ which is half the Attribute, rounded down.”

  “Why is it only half?” he said.

  “’Why’ is usually the wrong question to ask me,” Milo said.

  “I ... whatever.” Devin wasn’t that interested in the math behind the system right now. “Do abilities only raise all the Attributes they use, or only one of them?”

  “Critical successes can raise more than one, but one is the norm,” Milo said.

  “Is the Attribute that’s raised random?”

  “Yes. Mostly.”

  Devin chose to ignore the qualifier. “Can you give me some sort of benchmark for what the numbers mean?”

  “Twenty is the highest possible Primary Attribute for a normal, ‘unenhanced’ human, while 10 is the highest Secondary Attribute.”

  Devin whistled. “So I’m more than twice as strong and quick as a normal human?”

  “Yes,” Milo said.

  Devin considered that. He was getting more excited, to the point where he was almost forgetting how much pain he was in.

  “Do you think I should use a dagger or a short sword in combat?” he said.

  “I’d suggest you use both,” Milo said. “You want to raise as many Attributes as you can, and that means using as many abilities as you can.”

  “Oh,” Devin said. “Oh! That’s … I get it. I increase my level by increasing my stats, and I increase my stats by using associated abilities. So, I want weapons and abilities that have a bunch of attributes associated with them.”

  “Correct,” Milo said. “Using abilities isn’t the only way to increase Attributes – you can raise them by doing things that use an Attributes, or even through Achievements - but it’s by far the most reliable. Especially with Secondary Attributes. It’s much harder to get those to their maximums, even though the maximums are lower. They’re what holds up most enhanced from advancement.”

  Milo sounded like Devin’s high school science teacher when a student had gotten a hard question right. Devin opened his eyes and lifted his head to look at Milo. He chuckled.

  “What?” Milio said.

  “I was just sort of expecting to see a cat,” Devin said.

  Milo’s tail lifted higher, and his ears perked up.

  “Good,” he said. “That means you’ve internalized the most important lesson - that I am superior to any stupid dog. If you keep listening to me, you might survive this after all.”