Gildebrak looked at me like I’d just asked the dumbest question imaginable. “We'll just order in. There’s round the clock room service for everyone who lives in these temp quarters. The cafe and areas like those are for people who want to be social, or want a fresh meal instead of something that's been traveling for fifteen to twenty minutes from the kitchens.”

  “You mean to tell me that in the realm between that there's some big commercial kitchen with a menu you can order from?” A lot of things about the mystical world I'd been introduced to we're amazing, but that was perhaps the most impressive and simultaneously impossible thing I had ever heard.

  “Yes and no. There's no menu. You just tell them what you want, and they make it. Now, there is a limit, like if you ordered a seared blue lobster with foie gras made from phoenix liver, they’d probably say no. But as long as you order something semi-normal, it should be fine.”

  I was already salivating, and I didn’t have one ounce of shame about it. The idea of eating anything I wanted was truly harder to wrap my mind around than the fact that a god had quite literally given me a powerup.

  And Gildebrak clearly picked up on my growing wonderment, because she laughed once again and held a hand up. “I just want to remind you to keep it realistic, as I don’t have a fridge for leftovers. We can order again after you sleep if you’re hungry again.”

  I nodded eagerly. “Got it! Now how do we order?”

  “That phone in the wall,” Gildebrak said, pointing. “But why don't you let me order for us so you can see how it’s done? Just write down what you want.”

  She reached over to the small coffee table next to us and picked up a stack of sticky notes before tossing them to me. I caught them and couldn't help but marvel a bit at the normalcy of the apartment. Other than the obviously lacking kitchen, it was completely normal. Perhaps a lot more organized than I expected, but normal. There was even a quite large TV in the living room and a couple of gaming systems connected below it.

  “Now you cannot tell me that the PlayStation Network has reached all the way into other realms."

  “What? Oh, haha, it doesn’t. We have our own spoof of Internet here. It's not actually technology, it's magic, but it's meant to mimic it. And if I'm being honest, I'm pretty sure it's just an enchanted version of a VPN that makes me look like I'm in Oregon. Or maybe Washington.”

  I couldn't help but chuckle, shaking my head. It was so funny in my mind to imagine a group of Reapers coming from a particularly tough mission and collapsing on the couch together before booting up some MMORPG. But that was the thing wasn't it? Reapers were all just people after all, and people were going to do what people were going to do. I was sure that there were some Reapers who never really wanted to leave the era they were born in, but in order to be effective at their job, they likely had to learn how to at least be functional in modern society in order to navigate it. “You've got to know that's crazy, right?”

  “Maybe, in the grand scheme of things. But to be honest, I don't think about it very often. Now let’s get that dinner order of yours so we can get you to bed!”

  Right. Food! I was surprised that anything had distracted me from that. Trying to keep in mind that it was only what I could scarf down in one sitting, I ordered a tomahawk steak, blue rare, extra butter and in the style of a bald chef that I like to watch on YouTube. Did I know if they could do that? Of course not, but I figured it didn’t hurt to ask, and if they had the fake Internet that Gildebrak said they did, it wouldn't be too hard for them to look it up.

  That wasn’t all for my dinner order, though. I also asked for some fresh pineapple, coconut chunks, and a spinach-arugula salad with strawberry vinaigrette. It was a dish that we'd had at the diner for a single summer two years back, and it was utterly delicious! I'd been craving it every summer since, but we hadn't been able to get it back again after our strawberry vendor changed, and none of the customers really seemed interested in our salads beyond the classic Caesar and side dish.

  “You sure you’ll be able to handle all that,” Gildebrak asked as she crossed over to the white phone hanging from the wall. Speaking of anachronistic tech, it was strange to have magical high-speed internet but also a landline. “Don’t get me wrong, reaping and initiation burn a whole bunch of calories, but if you’re not used to eating a lot…”

  I wasn’t surprised that Gildebrak questioned my dinner order. There was nothing wrong with being naturally slender or fat, but I was a mid-size person who just wasn’t getting the calories my body wanted for financial reasons. It sucked, but when it came to rent or food, I paid rent. I could always swing by a food kitchen if I got a big enough gap between my jobs, but shelters in the city were packed out and I had a natural sort of reluctance to go to any temples for lodging. They said they were open to anyone in need, but I knew what they meant was that they were open to anyone who was willing to be preached, proselytized, or otherwise evangelized to.

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  “I promise I can handle this, and if not, I’ll eat it when I get up.”

  “Alright then, I’ll trust you on that.”

  Picking up the phone, she held it to her ear with her shoulder and for a moment, I had a bit of a flashback to my childhood and how my mother used to stand the same way. I realized that it wasn’t exactly a unique pose, but given the prevalence of cell phones, it was one I hardly ever saw anymore outside of the old phone at the diner.

  It didn’t take long for her to order, and I was a bit intrigued when the smaller woman ordered brisket pho, a spicy chicken sandwich with coleslaw and pickles, and three scotch eggs. I raised an eyebrow when she turned to me, but she just smiled blithely.

  “Us Reapers usually need to eat a lot after a mission, and I’m used to meeting my caloric requirements, so no judging.”

  “I wasn’t judging!” I totally insisted even though both of us knew I absolutely was.

  “Uh-huh. Wanna hit the shower while you wait for it to get here? Should be about twenty minutes.”

  A shower? Wow, that suddenly sounded like possibly the most amazing thing I’d ever heard. Sure, I was exhausted and wanted to collapse into a puddle and not move again for a good long while, but a hot shower? Now that was the real magic.

  “Yes please!” I tried not to sound like a kid seeing their presents lined up at Christmas, but failed pretty spectacularly.

  “Down the hall and to the right. You can’t miss it. You can use my robe on the back of the door. It’ll be a bit short on you, but otherwise should be pretty roomy.”

  “Are you calling me flat chested?” I countered, hoping to surprise her with a bit of snark out of nowhere. But Gildebrak was completely unflustered.

  “Pointing that out would be incredibly rude of me and goodness knows I’m never rude.”

  “Definitely not ever,” I agreed with a laugh before hurrying in the direction she told me.

  The bathroom was easy to find, and while it was in no way lavish, it was certainly much larger than the tiny one in my studio apartment. And perhaps the pièce de résistance was the deep, deep tub with jets in the side.

  I desperately wanted to just jump in, but I was filthy and still had far too much of the alley all over me. In fact, the only part of my body that was clean was where I had been injured and then tended to by the medics. So, it was a shower first, which I kind of rushed through as best I could, making sure to scrub every bit of me, before beginning to fill up the tub.

  The hot water felt amazing against my skin, a deluge of relaxation and comfort. Interestingly enough, all of Gildebrak’s hygienic supplies were scentless, but they worked so I certainly didn’t complain.

  Unfortunately, the bath was only halfway full when a knock sounded on the door and suddenly, I smelled the most delectable scent and my salivary glands went into overdrive.

  Oh dear.

  It was the last thing I expected, but suddenly I was very much torn between the luxurious bath and the delicious smelling food. I supposed that I could just bathe after I ate, but I was pretty sure that the moment my belly was full, I would pass out and fast. But if I bathed first, the food would be cold. Would it still be delicious? Of course! But not as delicious and I was so looking forward to a hot meal.

  It was a low stakes conundrum, but I found myself locked in indecision.

  “Uhhh…” I said to the knock, which wasn’t exactly a coherent response.

  “The food’s here!”

  “Yeah, I uh figured. I didn’t quite finish up in here.”

  There was a bit of a pause, and when Gildebrak spoke again, she sounded amused. “You wanna take my bath for a whirl, don’t you?”

  “Yeaaaahhhh,” I admitted.

  “Do me a favor and put my robe on for me. I’ll get you set up right.”

  “O-okay.”

  I was a bit baffled on what that could possibly mean, but I hurried to do as she requested. I figured that Gildebrak hadn’t lead me astray so far.

  So, still quite wet and dripping a puddle on her floor, I put on the robe and opened the door. Gildebrak stepped in, a large tray in her hand with several covered plates like it was fancy room service at a hotel. Setting it on the sink, she went to the small, narrow closet tucked into the wall and pulled something out. I wasn’t sure what it was at first, only seeing a flat of polished wood, but after a moment I realized it was a special sort of tray that was wide enough to span the bath and even had silicone grippers on each side.

  “Sometimes a girl just has to pamper herself, ya know?” she said, grinning as she set the tray over the tub then returned to the closet. Within a few minutes, the food was on the wooden tray as well as a candle, a long-necked lighter, and a large bottle of bubble bath. I noticed that this one wasn’t scentless, but pomegranate.

  “There you are!” Gildebrak said, looking proud as she finished her preparations. “Oh wait, a drink! Do you want some wine? Water?”

  “Water,” I said quickly. I wasn’t against drinking, but I figured now was absolutely not the time for it. “Cold if you have it,” I added quickly, remember that Gildebrak didn’t have a fridge and ergo no ice.

  “Yeah, there’s a faucet in the kitchen for that. It’s not like earth water, so you don’t have to worry about it being filtered.”

  “I wouldn’t care even if it was earth water. I drink from the tap all the time.”

  “That’s my girl! I’ll be right back and then you can settle in and enjoy a meal and a soak at the same time. Truly the lap of luxury.”

  I kind of felt like I was suddenly being spoiled and I couldn’t help but wonder if Gildebrak felt a bit bad for me after seeing my tiny studio, my worn down bike, and her comments about me not eating enough. Well, if she did, I still wasn’t going to turn down a fresh meal and a hot bath.

  It didn’t take her long to return with the water and with a promise to check in every half hour to make sure I didn’t accidentally fall asleep in her huge tub, she showed me how to use the jets then exited. Closing the door, I shed the robe and sank into the frothy water that somehow didn’t splash up onto the tray.

  The phantasms were scary, and the gods were something else entirely, but I knew I could really get used to such nice treatment.